View Full Version : relapse
I havent been on here in a while, ive been hiding away in my own world, ive had every test under the sun but i am convinced i have everything,.
Im sitting here right now without a doubt that the pain in my side is appendicitus and that i have cancer everywhere in my body. Its taking over. Im back on medication and having councelling again soon, my doctor has been so helpful, but nothing works.
I dont know, maybe i just need some comforting words by people in my situtation.
I have an infected wisdom tooth and i know i will die if i have the operation and my toungue got infected from it, which is why i keep thinking my appendix is about the blow. How are you coping with it? can anyone offer me any help, nothing has worked, ive tried everything, im making myself ill with worry and im cutting again which i suppose is lowering my immune system, i feel so run down.
Thanks xxx
Hi, sorry you are feeling so awful :hugs:
I too am feeling a little anxious about my health at the moment :( the only tests i have had are chest x-ray, ECG, oxygen tests, BP and blood tests. And that was about my breathing a couple of months back, now i know my lungs and heart are fine i have found new worries like my brain and any Neurological illness as i have not had them tests. Is it the same for you? which tests have you had??
Take Care. Marc
well ive only had blood tests, pressure, sugar etc. i figure if i had the dreaded cancer my blood would show some sort of abnormality, but that comforts me for seconds only, ive had x-rays in the past but only on my mouth, mostly just talking to the doctors, i would love to have a full physical with every test going, but i know it would do nothing to help.
I have actually made myself ill with the stress, i havent slept properly in weeks. i had a panick attack so bad the other day i collapsed, my boyfriend was so scared he called an ambulance, which was really embarrassing. At the moment i seem to be fixated on breast cancer, normally for me its blood clots, but i am at the point where i am so convinced i am dying, that things seem pointless, i dont feel joy anymore. Im on a waiting list for the councelling
Sounds alot like me to be honest. I too am waiting for some counseling, well done for getting some help anyways :yesyes:
I not going to even say to you "don't worry, try to not think about it" because I know it's so much harder than that, because I am going thu the same thing right now, thinking I am dieing 24/7 and its bloody horrible, i wouldn't wish it on anyone. I wish i could offer more advice but I am in the same boat as you right now, so lets hope we both get better soon :) :hugs:
thanks, its nice to know im not alone, ive had councelling before, im 23 but ive been like this since i was kid, its been a living nightmare.
Im only going for the councelling again so stop me bugging my poor doctor all the time.
It really frustrates me when people say `oh just snap out of it, your fine` i get it alot from my work friends, they dont mean to be horrible, but its hard when people dont take you seriously, or they think your some kind of attention seeker.
Yes i know what you mean, my brother is a prime example lol he knows i always worrying about my health and that, and he says is "well stop thinking your dieing because your not" lot easier for people who have never experienced this HA to say because they don't know what physical symptoms we get that mimic so many horid diseases out there. It's so hard to let go and get on with stuff when you think it's your last breath every 24/7.
Take care
I remember going through a time when for 2 years everytime i went to sleep, i was convinced i was going to die. In the end i drove myself mad and thought everyone was trying to kill me. its amazing what we make ourselves think
Yep, i too had a sleep problem (still do to be honest) I was scared to go to sleep fearing i would not wake up the next morning :( and this was before my physical symptoms appeared. This resulted in me staying up all night and day and only going to sleep when i was exhausted. I once stayed up for 3 days and nights lol
yeah i still have trouble sleeping, its worse these days, i keep getting really tired, my eyesight is bad as it is, but i kept thinking i had hypoglycemia. Ive been on a diet for almost a year now, mostly i gained alot of weight on my medication, which also made me quite ill, ive lost about 3 and a half stone so far, healthy, im still slightly overweight, but i even started to worry that i was going to die just from dieting. its a nightmare, everything leads to illness, i read somewhere that u can become hypo. from loosing alot of weight quickly, so thats on my mind alot lately.
im going to bed now, thanks for the comforting words
No worries :) Ironic talking about going to bed LOL
Have a good sleep :D
Hi Sweety,
I just wanted to tell you that we all know exactly how you feel. I am currently not experiencing health anxiety (well not terribly anyway) but I return here to try and help others. My 2 pieces of advice that I would give to you would be to NOT, I repeat NOT Google under any circumstance. And also, try to distract yourself. Try reading, playing a game on the computer, talking on the phone, chatting, or even reading others' posts and trying to help them. Posting on here for myself was a great help, but I think that posting to others and trying to help them was one of my biggest anxiety relievers when I was at my worst.
Don't mind others in your life who tell you to "Suck it up and deal with it!" because they don't understand. Health anxiety is a very REAL psychological problem that none of us can help! Jeez, they wouldn't tell a schizophrenic to snap out of it, would they? NO! Just chalk it up to the fact that often times hypochondria is looked at as a joke. Those who do not have irrational fears, phobias, etc. won't understand us. It isn't their fault, though. Maybe we are normal and they aren't, LOL! :) I wish!
Hope I could offer some comforting words to you. **hugs**
Thanks, reading over this thread has made me feel a little better, im still ill as it were, but my appendix thing has faded significantly.
Im still preoccupied with the dreaded C, but the infection in my mouth is clearing up, the only solace i can give myself is that if i had cancer, my immune system would be so low, the infection wouldn't heal? I have to say this site has been a bit help, now and in the past, i value your words of comfort, just to know i`m not alone, is a big relief, i hope you all get some relief soon, health anxiety is a bloody nightmare. I have found a small lump in my breast which is eating me alive at the moment, i dont want to make a doctors appointment since ive been there 3 times this month already, and the lump is only small but has been there for ages, i dont want to wait but i dont want to drive my doctor mad, he has always been very patient with me, and helpful. I know its rare at my age, but that doesnt help much :(
Hi, glad we could be of help :D
I wouldn't worry about going to the doc if I was you, it's their job to see you, don't matter how many times you go. If it makes you feel better than go as many times you want LOL
yeah, i figure since the lump has been there so long, if i just wait till the councilor phones, i could mention it when i`m there, since the councilor is at my doctors surgery, a few more weeks cant hurt, can it? the stress is killing me but that's nothing i haven't had to deal with before.
Thumbelina
18-08-09, 21:20
relapse - is a big one
lapse - is a small one
my doc likes to say - that i have lapses, he is so sweet.
Boosts the confidence though.
I am in LAPSE now....:)
my boyfriend has persuaded me to see the doctors tomorrow morning to sort myself out, i`m literally going mental with worry
Your be fine :D
Good luck with it all :yesyes:
I have a lump in my breast too. I had an ultrasound on it and a mammogram. I was really scared when I first found it about 3-4 years ago (only 21 years old then) and couldn't sleep I was so scared! But anyway....it turned out to be a bit of denser breast tissue than the rest of my breast. It never changes or anything. I'm sure you are fine :) Especially if you've had it for quite some time and it hasn't changed...it's probably just denser breast tissue, too! Always safe to get checked, though!
Hope you feel much better after you doctor's visit today/tomorrow! I always got some temporary relief for a while after seeing the doctor.
:bighug1:
well i didnt go to the docs today, i had no sleep last night and i was just too tired to make the journey, but tonight im getting an early night and heading straight there tomorrow. I am terrified, its small, about half the size of a marble and rock hard :( I developed a mole around the same area, only a small one, no change in size or shape, and i randomly lactated there about a year ago, but i was coming off citalopram then, all this together and im am royally kacking myself.
Thanks for your kind words, it feels so much better to be understood!!
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