I think I've found my trigger

[Jamie_]

Just really wanted to get this off my chest and see if this could potentially be the trigger to my anxiety..

I was deep in thought (as you do) and while i was thinking about how s**t my life is atm the same thought kept popping up..I'm single and have been for years..I'm also still a virgin..I'm only 19..s'all good

Anyways..i think my fear is not death itself but dying without having truly loved someone..i mean..what was the actual point in your existence if you never experienced love?

Does anyone know what i mean?


This post has been automatically edited by the NMP post filter

[pinkcherryhearts]

Being loved is really important, when I was growing up I felt that my dad didnt love me very much, this had a big effect on me and made me very insecure, you are still young, you have plenty of time to meet someone, I know that anxiety doesnt help and people dont understand, but there are some genuine people out there who can overlook the anxiety and see you for who you are, sometimes relationships are stressful, I know this sounds sad and pathetic but when i was lonely i bought a rabbit and she helped me so much, she gave me a routine and made me happy. Sadly she died recently but im thinking about getting a cat so I have a small responsibility and it can take my mind off things, i know it sounds stupid but they are using cats in therepy now because they have a calming effect on people :)

[steveh31]

I know what you mean i spent last night looking at the dating sites and everyone i looked at i thought either they wont look at me, or they wont go out with an anxious person or picking the faults in their profile. I'm just too picky and as a result will never meet anyone.

[Bunnah]

Steve,

Im working on my triggers as well. And although they are not exactly like yours, they sound similar around abandonment. IE never getting love would mean you re unlovable. Have you thought about sharing these feelings with a therapist?

You say this " Im single and I have been for years". Im interested that at 19 you feel that you should have had the Big Love.. also maybe an indication that you have felt alone for years? I guess Im suggesting that its not romance that you are missing rather, its a good healthy attachment?

B x x x