Help! I'm in the middle of an anxiety attack

[dizzydruid]

Hi,
I am feeling really really anxious right now and cant seem to calm myself down :( I'm not entirely sure where it has come from but...
I have had a really stressful day running round trying to let my son enjoy his birthday but I feel generally crap about it and that I have failed in giving him a good birthday.
I also went out on my new bike today, having not been out on a bike for 15 years and since cycling round my legs have been really hurting.
My boyfriend came round before he went to work this evening and I had a little cry because I felt so down and then my legs strated hurting me so I started getting anxious about that. He talked to me and said it is because I have been cycling for the first time in years and my muscles arent used to it. I know this is why but as I was struggling to get the excited birthday boy to bed I suddenly felt as though my throat closed up, it feels blocked like its packed full of mucus and any minute I wont be able to breathe.
I had this a few months ago and it passed and I though I had beaten it but I had just forgotten how real it feels. I cant swallow, I'm on my own with my two little ones in bed and I'm scared.
sorry for going on :(
lucy x

[carlin]

Hi Lucy,
Sorry you feel rough right now, you will not stop breathing, however much it feels like it at the moment, take deep breathes (easier said than done) you have had a very hectic day, Your legs ache because you have not cycled for a while and muscles that you never knew you had have been re-awakened, i'm sure your 'birthday boy' had a wonderful birthday. The feelings passed before when you had them and i promise you they will pass again soon, take things easy and keep in touch. xx

[Tan The Man]

Hi Lucy

You are probably feeling anxious because you are being too hard on yourself. You said that you feel like you have failed in giving your son a good birthday. I am sure that that is not true as you later say that you put the EXCITED birthday boy to sleep. So I am sure he has had a great day.

Also you are feeling anxious about the muscle soreness in your legs. I can assure you that anyone who goes cycling after 15 years is gonna feel sore. You should be congratulating yourself on such an amazing achievment. Well Done.

Don't be so hard on yourself. You have done great.

Watch some telly or a DVD, this should keep you busy and help you relax

Take care
Tan

[dizzydruid]

thanks for your replies :)
I guess I feel bad because he really wanted a party but with my anxiety and feeling depressed I really didnt feel up to having loads of kids round so I feel bad because its just another example of how I affect my kids plus this year I am a single mum and couldnt afford to get him the things I would have like to so I feel bad about that. It upsets me because I feel as though I hold my son back compared to his friends because of being depressed.
I'm now even more depressed due to the fact that I thought I had begun to get over anxiety but just as I feel better it sneaks up and bites me on the bottom :s I had forgotten just how real it all feels when it hits. Its seems as though I can tell myself over and over it was just anxiety when its not happening but as soon as it does all reasoning just flys out of the window and its so hard to think rationally when you feel as though you cant breathe.
Anyway thanks and sorry for going on, i always feel as if I write a novel each time I post but I guess I'm just a lonely mother who does get to talk to anyone about how I feel :(

lucy x

[Sax]

Hi Lucy,

You are giving yourself a hard time here and as others said should be looking at your mega achievements of going out cycling and putting an 'excited' lad to bed means he enjoyed his day! Wow, well done you.

You mentioned being alone and a lonely mother, how about coming into chat to distract yourself - either to chat, listen or just be amongst people who truely understand.

Take care Lucy and I think you've done really well today and now the children are in bed think about yourself and give yourself a break. Having a nice bath and pampering yourself helps, listening to some 'chilled' thought provoking music of your choice or joining friends in 'chat' room just might help you feel a little more settled.

Tomorrow will be a better day for you i'm sure!

Take care and pm me if you need to talk, i'm willing to listen.

Sax xx P.S. going into chat myself later! [8D]

[JPF]

Keep posting Lucy - it's what we're all here for - to listen and help.

Try to take a bit of time for yourself to relax and take your mind off the negative thoughts for a while. Stop beating yourself up, you're doing well and dealing with a difficult condition. It comes and it goes but in the long run, you'll beat it, hang on in there, smile and believe in yourself. The worm will turn :)

J

[carlin]

Hi again Lucy,
How old is your son? I am sure he has had a lovely day, don't compare what others may do, i have had that over the years, my kids are all older now, and the two youngest (who i felt would have been affected by my anxiety) have only good memories, so what he never had a party? he had his mum!!! Now you must stop blaming yourself for something that has not happened, most of us here are the same (well i am for sure) when the panic sets in, most of our logical thoughts go out of the window, i have been good lately on giving out advice, i wish i would listen to it myself! You are not going backwards, it is just a minor hiccup, take care and keep on touch, i write long posts too eh xxxxx

[Tan The Man]

Hi Lucy

Feel absolutly free to ramble on as long as you want :D . We are all here to support and listen to each other.

Many of us with panic/anxiety feel that we are holding back those we love as we are not able to do many of things that others take for granted. So we end up feeling utterly useless. But this is not always true. You know that you did the best you could given the circumstances, and no one expects more than that.

There is no need to feel depressed over the anxiety returning. It will not always be there. You are feeling it today because you have had a stressful day, and that can make anyone anxious. Look at the positive things you have done today.

I bet that tomorrow, your little boy will wake up still excited about his birthday :D . So enjoy the moment with him.

Take care
Tan

[meatybuddy]

hi lucy

try and relax a little it loks like to me that you are giving yourself a hard time, try and erlax and try and start and think positive thoughts also try to stop beating yourself up - you are doing well at dealing with a very dificult condition (or illnes) whichever it is im not sure..


this site is very good and a lot of understanding ppl on here more than willing to help

you will beat it

all the best


darren

There is light at the end of the tunnel its just fiding it thats the hard part

[dizzydruid]

thanks all, although my throat still feels a bit blocked it has cleared a bit so have calmed down and now just feel down.
Thanks for all your replies they mean a lot to me :)
As for coming into chat I would but I'm too shy[8)] plus I'm so down I will probably depress everyone in there and just whinge about life plus I'm scared of being ignored and not having anything to say:D I'm such a scardey cat :D
thanks all :)
lucy x

[Tan The Man]

Hi lucy

Glad to hear that you are calming down. It goes to show that the feeling will pass. Just relax and help it along its way.

Tan

[Meg]

Lucy,

You're doing just fine.

He's had a lovely birthday and you're doing better too now.

Well done for getting on a bike and having a ride round- no wonder your legs hurt, whole new set of muscles being used.

Keep yourself occupied.





Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

[3faces]

Hi there dizzydruid...[:I]

The only thing I wanted when I was little was love and affection. I bet you give your little boy so much love, kisses and cuddles and those are the important things....not material things. I'm sure you gave him a lovely birthday and did the best that you could for him, that is the important thing.
You sound like a lovely, caring mum and I'm glad your physical symptoms are calming down....you have done that for yourself, you've taken control of them.
I feel the same way about the chat room, too shy and worry I won't have anything to say but we're all in the same boat. I'm happy to chat anytime, I have three boys and used to feel guilty like you when they were very young....it gets easier with time. LOL[:I]

Jem xxx

[Piglet]

Hi Lucy,

Aww I felt like I could have written your post - I've felt just like that on many occasions (I'm single mum of three).

I go in the chat room when I can and it always gives me a lift. No-one expects you to talk or join in unless you want to, there are plenty of just 'listeners' in there.

Also about the achey legs - when I first started on my rebounder my legs were really achey and yes even though my common sense told me it was ok I still worried about it.

You are doing fine, more than fine, we all get bad days, or up and down days and this was one of them. I get just the same on birthdays and Christmas as I want to give my children a magical childhood. One thing I do know though, my children always know I love them and so do yours.

Big hug:)

Love Piglet


"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.

[pips]

Hi Lucy,:)

Don't worry I'm sure he had a fantastic birthday. [Wow!] You have been doing great it's just a blip that's all. I hope your throat clears soon and you feel better.

As for the cycling [Yes!] it can hurt! I pushed myself a few months ago and cycled 22 miles along part of the tarka trail. Boy did i cry when i got home thought i was a gonna! LOL[xx(]

Take Care,;)

Love PIP'S X X