I did something horrible

[amu]

I entered into a detailed argument with someone who has cancer regarding the impact of what we eat on cancer. (because i hate those fake doctors who claim cancer can be cured by being on a raw diet or cutting out dairy from our diet and underpin their argument with false data - as my Dad died of cancer this fake info to sell their book stuff makes me angry.)

Anyway we argued over a certain issue in this theme and being a statistician I went further and further until I proved my point, to which he just replied thanks this is interesting.
And as he did not argue back I was overcome with immense guilt:

- why am I trying to "defeat" someone who has cancer in a cancer-related subject?
- why on Earth do I enter in an argument in a cancer-related subject at all, since I don't even have cancer and no one in my family currently has cancer?
- why do I know that much about cancer at all? And why do I research cancer? I am not a doctor, I should never ever again pretend I know anything about cancer.

I hate myself. Do you think I do all this because of my anxiety??? I am a horrible person.

[Thumbelina]

in my opinion

you must be still angry about the death of your dad,

that person that you spoke to - was associated with your dad
you are arguing with this person as you are trying to help your dad,

you feel guilty because that person has cancer,

but the good thing is that you at least made that person think more, and maybe he will look deeper into this area and who knows he might recover completely somehow due to this argument....

feel better?

[amu]

You are probably right... I think he is even the same age as my dad was when he died. It might be that I am trying to help my dad through reading and talking about cancer and what does and what doesn't cause cancer...

I need therapy!

[Thumbelina]

you are doing self therapy now

you know we are scared of many things - and by talking about these things we become not scared of them any more.

Therapy is good, but what you ahve done is only natural....