Adelle
20-08-09, 02:24
Hi, I am so tired of my health issues. Im driving myself crazy. I know what Im doing is not normal but I cant stop. I check my body about 10 times a day for new spots or changes. I actually have a mild panic attack when I go for a shower as I m scared Ill see something new in the mirror. I try to talk myself out of it but out of nowhere I will be googling symptoms ( i know not to do this ). I m so scared of getting cancer and not being here for my baby son. I know its getting really bad now because the first thing i think about in the morning is "how am i feeling today?" I thought I was getting better and I have moved house 3 weeks ago and I promised myself that I wont google or look at my skin all the time but its worse than ever. I have a great life and am very happy. Its like I need to find something to worry about when Im really happy. Ive had health anxiety on a small scale for as long as I remember. I thought I had AIDS when I was a child and had my first panic attack because of those scary adds that first came out with the grim reaper. Ive been to the doctors and had many moles removed (all were OK). I was put on anxiety meds but had a bad skin reaction to them (typical). Im trying to help myself and have ordered many self help books which I hope arrive soon. I need it. In the meantime I hope this site will help me a little. Thanks for reading this. Take care. :)