my story - require help and support

[alexm]

Hi guys - first of all let me thank you for reading.

My story began 3 years ago when i broke up from my partner at the time (see was a crank) i was 22yo.

I had to move back with my parents, at the time they were on holiday.

i moved all my stuff back to my old bedroom and to chear myself up put my computer in the spair room to play on. i wanted to get on the internet and my folks didnt have broadband so i was looking for the phone socket and found it behind the book case. while knelt on the floor pulling the roof hight book case away from the wall i wabbled it too much and a solid silver candilarbra fell off the top and cracked me on the head. i didnt pass out just fell forward and felt crap as you can imagine. i went to look in the bathroom and i had blood all over my face.

Stoopidly i took it upon myself to drive to my grans. who cleaned me up and patched the gash. went back home and had a good sleep. on the way to work the following day i found it realy hard to concentrate and nearly blacked out a few times. once at work i called NHS direct and the nice lady advised me to go to casualty.... which i did.

They checked me out and said i was fine... and that i may have the feelings for a few days.

i know you're sat there thinking ... what has this to do with anxioty.. but please read on.. im just filling you in on the background.

after a week i still felt odd so i went bacl and they checked me again and told me i was fine.. i felt better a reassured.

as a month went by and we were approching christmass i felt terrible most of the time at work and while out with friends. dizzyness and problems focusing and a couple of random panick attacks at work. many times i had gone out and had to come home because i felt soo bad. once home i was fine. i convinced myself i had a brain tumor or blood clot on the brain.

i eventualy whent to the doctors and was tested and diagnosed with anxioty related depression due to recent events. they put me on some anti-depressants which realy fixed me.. i felt great and was on them for 12 months. i found it hard to come off them... well not hard becuase i didnt want to but because of the nasty side effects.. after a few months i did and was fine for a few months.

the dizzyness/balance and focusing/odd head aches/shortness of breath returning. i knew what it was so it wasnt as bad and i thought i could control/live with it.. since then its got worse. and the past few weeks have been very stressfull and strange.. i seem to have almost lost the dizzyness/focus/balance etc. instead i now feel the folloing

*my ribs feel sore all the time
*heart occasionaly races/pounds
*short breath - breath taken away feeling/heart in mouth
*tingling etc
*pains in my chest like someone stood on me with high heels in the center or left or right

i am also having problems sleeping

i have now convinced myself i have a heart condition.

these probs i have had in the last month seem to manifest themselvs at work towards the end of the day

while preparing to go out with friends.

i just need a lil support and guidance.

thanks for reading (appologies for spelling and grammer) [8D]:D

[trac67]

Hi ALex,
Firstly welcome to the forum, you will get a lot of good advice and make some great friends here.
The symptoms you have listed are all typical anxiety ones, especially the shortness of breath, the heart racing, the chest pains, ok all of them are lol. Anxiety is a wierd thing the symptoms we feel change from day to day, we get reassurance of one thing and then something else pops up to worry us. Be positive assure yourself these are anxiety symptoms and they will gradually disappear, don't let them take over who you are.
Pm me if you ever need a chat anytime.
Take care
Trac xx

'Live your life with arms wide open, today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwitten'

[lara100]

Hi Alex,

I get all those symptoms with panic. Have you ever thought the reason why you get the symptoms before you go out with your friends is because you expienced other symptoms while you were out with them previously. Another thing that was pointed out to me recently (I am having councelling for binge drinking related to anxiety p.s I am not suggesting you are a binge drinker but the situation is similar x) is that I only tend to drink alot when I go to the pub where I have friends but it is a social situation where I dont feel safe for many reasons i.e. I dont know what to talk about, will I do something stupid etc etc. This makes me anxious and therefore I drink more to combat it (subconciously apparently!). I can easily have people I trust at my house wher e I (subconsiously again) feel in control and safe and I dont fell the need to binge.

Might it be that you are having some of these feelings and not be totally aware of them and this is making you anticipate that you will feel anxious? Once you anticipate anxiety the good old autonomic system kicks in and the physical symptoms arrive. Maybe thats why you get the symptoms of panic while you are preparing to go out.

Lara x

[alexm]

hi guys, thanks for the replys.

let me give you a lil more background..

when i was in my early teens i used to get some wierd reactions when in public places. when shopping in town with friends or parents and it was realy buisy i used to get realy hot and start itching uncontrollably and to make it pass i had to go stand in a shop.. eventualy as i reached the end of my teens it stopped happening.. i have always been shy and reserved anyway..

Im not a heavy drinker.. maybe on special occasions such as birthdays etc. and i dont drink through the week nor do i go out much with my friends anymore. they all got kids or have a large thumb on there forehead. so the majority of people / friends i socialise with now are work mates etc.

some little extra detail on my original post..

when i was 15/16 my grandad died and i fount it very hard.. being quit reserver even with my parents i greaved on my own.. i still find it upsetting to think of him although i still do most weeks and sometimes talk to him.

when i was 22 my uncle died unexpected and i found it extreamly hard (he was like a cool uncle that i got on with) as i was in a bad realationship with no one to turn to.. when i went to his funeral i found it hard to drive and do thing as i was soo upset.. my parents were on holiday at the time so i was attending my uncles funeral on my dads behalf.. which was extra hard.

shortly after my nan died (it wasnt much of a shock as it was kind of expected as she was very ill).. i dont remember crying and i thought i was odd for not doing so..


so just a lil extra background there.

[Meg]

Alexm

Your story of developing health anxiety is not unusual especially with the background of bereavements.

You can either ask for some counselling to explore your fears in, get some specific CBT or try to manage it yourself.

http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/symptoms.htm
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/healthanxiety.htm

First Steps to overcoming Panic and Anxiety (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=942)

Lets try to keep our thoughts in perspective (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=283)
Mind Games (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1789)
obsessive thoughts & anxiety (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=3096)
Still suffering this damn "suggestive" thing.. (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=4288)
How to CURE yourself ! The definitive guide here.. (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=5357)




Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

[alexm]

thanks for the help guys.

[april tones]

hiya, pm if you want as i find it easier to take time to post. i have had this, having again at moment because of various things! not nice. im sure its anxiety! not nice xxx

apriltones

[boy]

My story's similar! I won't go through it all but my list is long like yours although I've yet to have my first panic attack, I pricately cry it out instead.

[Aprilfool]

Hi Alex,

I know exactly how you feel .... chest pains, racing heart, ectopics, high anxiety.

Just had all the heart tests known to man .... and you guessed it! I have a healthy heart. Apart from the ectopics that the cardiologist picked up (he told me they are awful, unpleasant, uncomfortable but completely harmless .... remind me of that when having a run of them !)

I really do think this is all Mr. Anxiety rearing his very ugly head, time and time again.

I am trying to control it, very difficult though, my breathing is not too hot which causes symptoms I know, but the chest pains aggggrrrhhh!!

I really hope I have helped to alieviate your fears a little, you will get through this, promise!

Take good care XXXXAPRILXXXX