returning to work after being signed off [Archive]

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coco81

02-09-09, 17:29

Hi, I have suffered anxiety and depression for as long as I can remember (i'm 28), however I only recently went to see a GP about it as I felt it was really affecting my life. I was signed off work 2 weeks ago to see if that would help matters as I was quite stressed at work. I'm due to go back to work tomorrow, but I have a GP appointment first. I'm sitting here physically shaking, my stomach is in knots, I feel sick and I'm starting to get a headache - all for the thought of going back to work! I do hate my job, but I get on with everyone. I mostly hate it because I sit there doing nothing while everyone seems really busy around me - You're probably thinking how that can stress me out, but it does! I also hear about how people talk about people that are signed off and I saw on a colleagues facebook page she was moaning about people being off etc.

The first week I was signed off, I was feeling good, I cleaned the house up a bit, painted the walls and felt less depressed and anxious and certainly less stressed. But this week I've sat on the couch all day watching daytime tv, not even motivated to get up and go to the loo or eat! (although I do go) because the thought of work is constantly on my mind, I lie awake at night worrying about it.

I keep telling myself It's probably best to go back to work tomorrow because if I have any longer off, it will be even more difficult to go back! But I don't feel ready - but will I ever feel ready?

What usually happens at the 'end of sign off' period with the Dr, do they just ask how things are going? Do they ask if you want to go back etc? This is my first time in my life I've been signed off, so not too sure of the process?

With your own experiences, what's the best thing to do?

What's also not helping is I also get very nervous about going outside, I don't know if it's a mild form of agoraphobia or what, but the thought fills me with dread - even taking the bin out! I hate being seen in my own home too, I will hide if anyone goes past the window!!
I haven't left the house alone in the 2 weeks I've been signed off - will be a struggle walking to the Dr's!

Sorry I went on a bit. Thanks!

angiebaby

02-09-09, 20:41

Hi hun, i understand what you are going through.
I was off for 7 months and it was very difficult for me to go back, but i did it and i dropped my hours to make it easier for me.
Been back now for about 20 months and i still struggle each day, but continue the best ways that i can. I am still here to tell the tale, lol.
I did find that i was getting scared of leaving the house at one point and would have been quite happy to just stay in forever. But i had to force myself to leave the house as i was scared that it would turn into a more severe phobia and then i would never leave the house again. The more that i left the front door the more i thought that it would get easier in time and believe me it has. It's funny how i feel comfortable leaving the house through the front door now but i still struggle with going into the back garden, i don't know why that is.
I also found myself hiding from people coming to the door and if i had no choice but to answer the door then i was a wreck inside, if it was a visitor and they had to come in and i had to make them a drink, i went through hell. This has also improved with time.
You may have your GP appointment and they may think you need more time.
Do what is best for you hun.
xx

JohnLuke300

02-09-09, 21:37

The reason you felt less anxious/depressed the first week you were off work was because you were active. Anxiety is created by negative thinking, if you are active your mind is distracted away from negative thoughts. The second week you were inactive and you probably dwelt more on the thoughts that make you anxious. This is common if you have an inactive or structureless life style.
You mentioned you think you might have a mild case of agoraphobia. Agoraphobics generally believe if they will have a panic attack if they leave the house. You state that you hate to be observed, even through the windows of you house. This is a typical response of a social phobia sufferer (I should know I have been one for over 30 years. :wacko:), although it is common for anxiety disorder sufferers to have some of the symptoms of other disorders.
The fact that you are clearly concerned what others might think about you based on your actions is also typical of social phobia.

My last job I had for 14 years and pretty much felt as you feel now. I chose to quit, which resulted in my phobia becoming worse and I became totally reclusive for 6 years. The only way to overcome the condition is to understand it, expose yourself to it and stop avoiding situations that make you anxious.

coco81

03-09-09, 11:43

Thanks for your replies. I agree it is best to face your fears than shy away from them.

I've come across another problem. I was so sure my Dr appointment was for 10am today, as when I phoned to make it last week, the receptionist said there was nothing available for last week and the next one was for another week. Anway, I turned up at Dr's this morning and they told me that the appointment was for last week! Which was really humiliating and everyone was staring! Plus I had just walked for 25 mins in pouring rain to get there, only to find I had to go straight back again!

Anyway I don't know what to do now, do I go back to work as my medical certificate said signed off for 2 weeks, or do I stay at home? My next appointment isnt until tomorrow 3pm - so do I go back to work tomorrow? I'm so confused! I've informed my linemanager but he didn't make it very clear what I should do - he's new too, so I don't think he's sure either!

sandy35

03-09-09, 13:19

My advice would be to wait until you see your g.p. before going back to work. Your g.p. can always backdate your sick certificate. To be honest it doesn't sound like you are ready to go back to me but make sure you get out of the house even if it is to go for a walk or to the local shops. Also you will need to ring in sick to your work tomorrow and explain that you are seeing the doctor later.

coco81

03-09-09, 14:05

Thank You so much for your reply - it has helped a lot. I don't really feel ready to go back to work, but I just feel the longer I'm off the harder it will be to go back - double edged sword!

I called my work so they know I won't be in today or tomorrow. I emailed my line manager too (he doesn't work in our office) and he asked me to send the amended certificate, so hopefully I'll get one tomorrow! If not, I'll probably just take it as unpaid leave.

Thanks again, it's put my mind at rest. My family don't know I'm signed off, so I didn't have anyone to ask in person about it all!

JohnLuke300

03-09-09, 14:40

You're right, the longer your off the harder it will be for you to go back. That's anxiety for you. By the way, feeling humiliated for missing your appointment and believing everyone was staring at you are classic social phobia symptoms.
And I know exactly how that feels but believe me you have no reason to feel humiliated. People miss appointments often and it just means your a little absent minded at worst. Secondly it is highly unlikely people were really taking much notice of you. The feeling of being stared at is one of the fundamental aspects of social phobia. The only person who will have remembered the event after a day or two is you. Trust me I have a lot of experience in these matters so don't beat yourself up about it (which by the way is known as the post mortem phase of social phobia :wacko:).

coco81

03-09-09, 15:23

Yeah I hate going out with my husband's family and meeting new people and just any social situation. I used to avoid them when I could and always say 'no'. Yeah I really do beat myself up about situations like today, would be great to just laugh it off, but sadly that never happens! Maybe one day!
Thanks again

sandy35

03-09-09, 15:25