Friend's 21st party

[alicat88]

Hi, this is my 1st post, I'm 21 and have been suffering from panic disorder for about 3 years.

At the minute I'm feeling constantly depressed. I'm currently on citalopram 20mg, but every day is the same. I feel so unreal at times it really alarms me. It's like I just can't "lift" myself out of this mood every day. Even when I am doing things (like horse riding) that are my passion, it's like I don't even care anymore.

I've went really backwards in terms of socialising. I just hate the thought of it now, not even due to the panic attacks (which are awful) but just this sense of what's the point?

Anyway, tonight is my friend's 21st birthday party. Not a massive one, friends and maybe a couple of people I don't know very well. The thing is, and I feel TERRIBLE for saying this, I just plain don't want to go. I'm afraid of dragging everyone's mood down, or just not having anything to talk about. Or even burting into tears or something.

Can anyone help? I've been listening to music all day to try and get me in the mood, but so far :(

[leelee100]

Hey there,

I know it can be really tough sometimes but try not to think about whats going to happen, or what your gonna say. Just take what comes your way. As for the panic-if it comes just breath and tell yourself you know its just the panic and anxiety and nothing more serious. You could end up actually having a really good night, or it might just be alright. But if your friends expecting you, think to yourself im gonna go for them-take the focus off of yourself and try and place it on your friend or others around you. you dont have to stay too long if it got really bad-just say you have a big day tomorrow. But try and go for a bit:whistles: