SO SAD.................

[linjane]

This is such a hard thing to post. I went to my midwife yesterday and my worst fears were confirmed, the babies heart had stopped beating. She couldn't find the heartbeat so sent me to hospital for a scan, where the confirmed my fears. We are both devasted and can't believe this has happened again. Even at the hospital the midwife said s**t happens to good people. I have to take a tablet on Thursday to start the process of delivery and go back to hospital on Friday for it to happen. I wanted to let you all know, because I know there are people on here who have been with me, in a way, throughout this pregnancy.
Linda.x

[eeyorelover]

oh Linda -
I am so sorry to hear that!!! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this time. If you need someone to talk to just let me know.

Sandy
(eeyorelover)

If the world didn't suck... we'd all fall off :)

[tygwyn]

Linda I am so so sorry to hear about this. I know through bitter experience how devastating this can be. If you need to chat please feel free to email me.

I will be thinking about you this week.

Take good care of yourself and take time to grieve.

You're in my thoughts

Rach xxxx

"True acceptance means 'facing and relaxing' - it is submission" (Claire Weekes)

[pinkscrumpy]

Linda

I am so sorry to hear this. My thoughts are also with you.

I to know though bitter experience how hard this is to go through.

Lots of love

MANDIE XX

Will I ever escape this?
Will I ever be free?
Wake me up from this nightmare.
Please just give me the key!

[nomorepanic]

Linda

So sorry to hear this as I know how excited you were about the baby:(

My thoughts are with you and we will help you get through this.

Sometimes these things just aren't meant to be and I know that is no comfort right now but I am a great believer in "what will be will be".

Thinking of you

xx

Nicola

"Nearly all happiness comes into our lives through doors we don't even remember leaving open"

[hunny]

Hi Linda
Im so so sorry to hear of your loss.
I experienced a loss too and know how hard this must be for you.
Take care of each other
Love and huge hugs
Hunny x

[trac67]

Linda,
I am so sorry to hear your sad news, I know that nothing anyone is going to say is going to make you feel any better, but we are all here for you, and our thought are with you and your husband right now.
Take care hun.
Trac xx

'Live your life with arms wide open, today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwitten'

[mazz]

hi linda iam so sorry to hear your sad news .my thoughts are with you , take care xxx

[Quirky]

Linda,
I am so so sorry to hear your sad news. I don't know how you must be feeling I can only imagine but I really feel for you right now.
Thinking of you, take care,
Love Lisa x x

[Holly]

Linda,

How awful, I'm so very sorry this has happened to you. I'm not on here often so you won't have chatted to me before, but I just had to reply by way of support, I had a tear in my eye when I read your post. Take care,

Holly xxx

[carlin]

Linda,
My thoughts are with you xxxxxxxxxxxxjean

[Meg]

Linda,

How utterly devastating.

I am so sorry, my heart sank as soon as I saw the title of your post and I opened it willing it not to be this news.

We are all here for you and I shall be thinking of you until we hear from you again after these next few harrowing days.

Love

Meg xx

[angieb]

Dear Linda

I just don't know what to say, sorry just does not seem enough somehow.

My thoughts are with you darling.

Angie x

[chucklehound]

Hi Linda,

I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. Please feel free to PM me if you want to chat.


Take Care

Chucklehound

xxxx

[kate]

Linda,

So sorry to hear your sad news.

Kate x

[rhowes2000]

I dont know you and I havent experienced anything like that but I just wanted to say I am very very sorry to hear this news. Really hope you manage to cope ok through a very difficult time. Take care.

[Karen]

I'm really sorry to hear your sad news Linda. Will be thinking of you these next few days.

Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

[alexis]

Hi Linda, I am so sorry I know what a hard time you have had, I am so sorry, you know where I am if you need me, take care, try to be strong, will think of you on Thursday,Love Alexis,xxxxx

Alexis

[linjane]

Thankyou all so much for your lovely kind messages.

Nothing ever goes to plan......When I got back from work yesterday, I went to get the kids a McD's, to save cooking, so I could just rest. I got out of the car and realised I had started bleeding. My friend, Joanne came straight here to take me to hospital and my mother in law came to
look after the children. Basically, I had already started the process myself. They kept me in yesterday and my 'labour started properly about 3am this morning (thursday). I had my baby at 2.20pm this afternoon. Although it is not yet 100% definate, we think we had a baby boy and we have called him Reece. The hospital is doing lots of blood tests for me and we have agreed for a post-mortem for Reece. I am back at home now and should go to bed as I haven't slept properly since I found out on Tuesday.

The midwifes at New Cross, in Wolverhampton were second to none and their care was excellent. Also, my friend Joanne spent every possible moment she could with me. My husband couldn't face any of it. I can't explain how I feel right now, cheated, upset, angry, sad.....I did cry early this morning, which is good for me and the tears are easier this time almost as if this has helped me grieve for Cory too.

I feel as though I know some of you on here and your words were lovely. Thankyou again.

Love, Linda.xxx

[alexis]

Hi Linda, just to say thinking of you all, you, your hubby, your dear friend Joanne and all the midwives, so glad you have had good care at such a difficult time, it is good you were able to cry and of course it would bring back memories of Cory.
I hope you manage to get some rest, you all need it, take care and remember we are all her with you as much as is possible.
Take care, be in touch soon, Love Alexis,xx

Alexis

[Meg]

Linda,

Glad that you did it yourself , saved being induced.

Thinking of you lots this week and we are here for you as much as you need.

Cry if you get the urge , it is healing.

Love and a huge hug

Meg

[pinkscrumpy]

Thinking of you loads Linda. Am pleased you have good people arround you

Love

MANDIE XX

Will I ever escape this?
Will I ever be free?
Wake me up from this nightmare.
Please just give me the key!

[3faces]

I was so upset when I read your message...I can't even begin to imagine what you and your family are going through. My thoughts and love are with you. Take care of yourself and we are all here for you if you need us:(

Jem xxx

[Quirky]

Thinking of you and your family Linda.
Take care,
Lisa x

[carlin]

Hugs, cuddles and love to you xxxxxxxxxxxjean

[lin]

Hi linjane

It was so sad to read your message i hope you are all ok. I am thinking of you.

take care
linda xxx

[linjane]

Just to say thankyou, again for all of the kind messages.

I'm in limbo at the moment. I haven't got the energy to do anything, but I keep wanting to just do normal stuff but end up just sitting about or sleeping or talking on the phone. My hubby is very quiet, he spent yesterday putting up a new bed for our daughter and then got angry because it is faulty and also the mattress we had for it is too big! We haven't talked much since it happened and he has just left for work this morning. I hope we can get through this after all the other things we have been through together, but it might be hard. He is obviously hurting too but not sharing his grief with me anymore.

The children are still at his moms and I am missing them terribly. I thought he would have collected them last night as my other friend, Lynda is coming this morning to be with me today, but he said he will get them when he finishes tonight, which isn't till 7. I know that they are ok but also that they really need to be at home.

My thoughts are all over the place, with what ifs, but I'm sure I couldn't have changed what happened. I had given up smoking and drinking (not that I over indulged in either that much, before I was pregnant) I didn't eat tuna or pate and didn't even have any peanuts. Maybe we will get some answers from all of the tests the hospital has done. I feel really let down by the consultant I saw when I was nearly 14weeks. I had asked and asked for a scan then and they said I didn't need one and they said they had heard the baby with the thing they put on your belly (don't know proper name for it). But I didn't hear the baby myself and because Reece was so small they have said that although I was 17weeks pregnant that he was not a 17week baby. He could have stopped growing at around 12weeks and died then or could have just stopped growing and died later, but if they had scanned me this would have been picked up then. Again, the post mortem might answer these questions but I am going to make a complaint about what happened at that appointment. Surely with my previous history, they should have been much more careful.

My labour was so strange, because of the drugs they gave me to help with the pain, I felt strangely happy. I had co-codamol to begin with at 5.30am then by 10am the pain was really bad again so I started on the gas and air and they gave me an injection of pethidine about 11 because it was just unbearable. The pain relief from that doesn't last long so they then topped me up with morphine which greatly relieved the pain and didn't wear off until long after I had delivered Reece, which was 2.20pm. I was chatting to my midwife like she was a long lost friend but the 'happy' feeling was strange because I knew it was such a sad time. I was even anticipating giving birth, half expecting to have a live baby, which really deep down, I knew I wasn't.

I've rambled on enough now, for one post.
Speak to you all again soon,
Love, Linda.xxx

[alexis]

Hi Linda, you havent rambled at all, it will do you good to write it down and that is why we are here, for you, to listen as much as we possibly can.
Just to say still thinking of you, I will not pretend I know how you feel but take care, and pm if you need anything, love Alexis,xxxxxxxxx

Alexis