Self Esteem

[barbn]

Okay - tell me I am not the only one that feels like they don't deserve anything "good" in their lives...I have both GAD & HA and I just hate myself sometimes. Now I am working on this, it isn't easy....I just feel terrible about myself, like I can't do anythign right! Or its like I have to feel terrible because that is all I deserve....I constantly look for "signs" that something is going to get screwed up....

[LisaLisa]

I totally relate to this. I posted on another thread earlier abou this too. I think that HA and gad might even be based on , or at least rely on low self esteem to exist. For me its like an underlying fact that i dont deserve good things and I am contunually awaiting punishment for every 'bad' thing that i have ever done and incidently there is noooooooo forgiveness ever when it comes to me!!! lol
Its horrible. Thats how my GAD feels and HA is just another guise of it. Its just a way to beat myself up i think :mad:

Lisa
xxxx

[amu]

Been there, done that, got the T-shirt... I feel the same way. That I don't deserve anything good in my life, eg. happiness in my relationship, money, a good job, my family. As soon as something good happens I freak out, and I feel that I am in one of those overdramatised films about how someone is incredibly lucky and then suddenly dies or their child is abducted or something.

If something good happens I try to look for something bad in my life (as if HA & OCD wasn't enough, :doh: ) to prove to myself that it's ok, I still have all kinds of crap around me so I don't have to wait for doom... argh.

Also when something good happens, I feel that I didn't deserve this, that this happened to me accidentally and why didn't it happen to someone else and I feel guilty. While when something bad happens I feel it is perfectly normal as this is what I deserve.

[Desprate Dan]

I can relate to this aswell, i always feel infearer to others as if i am not worthy, although people have said i am the kindest freindliest person they have met, i dont believe it and i find i have to tell myself i'm not a bad person.. I think being hurt by people very close to me in the past has brought this about...

Like at work for instance i feel bad if i get asked to work over and i cant i find it very hard to say no... i cant bear the feeling of letting someone down and feel bad about it... Crazy but i think more of others than i do myself.

[amu]

Dan: it's the same with me and I often feel that I am selfish and horrible. And I care too much about what other people say and think about me.

[LisaLisa]

Amu

You could be writing about me OMG

Its rubbish isnt it......what should we do?

Lisa
xxx