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View Full Version : Depersonalisation won't go away!!!



Alicat
13-09-09, 01:11
Hi,

I joind this forum in July when I'd had a suicidal episode and started experiencing depersonalisation. It's been lingering ever since, It went for a while. I went on holiday for a week 2 weeks ago and I was ok the whole time I was away. Also, if I'm really busy or in a situation I'm surrounded by people I feel close to, I seem to be ok...and it's such a relief! I was at the physio today and felt 'normal' the whole time I was there!

I've started thinking about all the reasons why I shouldn't be here (mainly disability related), then humans in general and I've started thinking it about other people when I see them! It's really disturbing me! It's not like me at all. I like people and value others but I just don't feel in control of my thoughts!!! It's so horrible! :unsure:

Just wanted to share with people who understand.

I've e-mailed the counsellor I see so I should have an appointment soon. Also I'm going back to work and starting a college course next week after 2 months at home so that should help... hope!

Thumbelina
13-09-09, 07:44
Hi Ali,

Depersonalisation is very scary and it makes lots of weird thoughts go through your head.

With the episode you had recently it is not so surprising that you feel the way you do. You battle inside, because you hate to believe that what happened to you was the tryth, you are denying that, and trying to distant yourself. But its sticks harder, so just ttry and let it go, and say its ok to feel and think the way i am now. "We not always can control what goes through our heads but we can control the way we react to it".

Just let the mess, sadness and gloom be there for a while and when it will see that you have no reaction to it - it will pass.

Take care,

Alicat
14-09-09, 02:39
Thanks. Makes sense.

I've had a horrible day. I couldn't stop crying and felt scared. I tried to keep myself busy reading and things. I felt better by the evening. My stupid neighbour is keeping me awake, which really isn't helping.
I have an appointment with the counsellor in 2 weeks, which seems like an eternity. She's on holiday.

I've decided I'm going to try and improve my bad habits (my coffee is going in the bin) I'll probably be alright at that while I'm at work and have a routine.

I'm glad I have this forum. It's so nice to have people who understand!

emmalami
14-09-09, 16:37
what are your symptoms of depersonalisation?? How does it make you feel?

Alicat
15-09-09, 22:48
Well...when it's at it's worst, I feel like I'm in my own world and watching everyone else but not really part of it. As others have describes it-like I'm in a bubble.

At the moment, it's more just a state of complete confusion. Like I can't make sense of anything and I'm wondering again what others are doing and why I can't just get on with life like I do when I'm ok. I've been wondering why everyone is doing things...what I'm doing here...what anyone or anything is doing here. Not living and engaging in things like I would normally. I feel like an outsider. Driving myself crazy.

emmalami
28-11-15, 16:47
Do you take any medication for your dp?