24-10-05, 20:03

About 7 years ago my mum had an affair and this caused a lot of arguments with my parents my dad got really depressed and ended up in a a physicatric hospital he was only in there for a few days and when he come out my mum and dad would argue a lot sometimes fight as well ive seen a lot i really shouldnt have seen my dad then went and had an affiar we went thorugh hell for about 18 months and then they seemed to get over it obviously still had their ups and downs but no where near as bad other than my mum still drinking (shes an alcholic) everything seemed to be normal with them. As a result of all ive seen i got ill and started suffering from severe anxiety and depresion which ive been on prozac for 3 years for and also gone counselling to deal with some of my issues i still suffer from anxiety but am learning to deal with it things were defintly looking i've even started to come of my prozac but now my dad has got depressed again and last night he got really drunk and him and my mum had a really bad raw like they used to have when things were bad and Im scared it all going to start again I cant go through all that again cause its gonna make me ill I really dont know what to do sorry its a long post just needed to get it off my chest hope it makes sense.


24-10-05, 23:05
Sorry to hear about this Lisa.

Hopefully your counselling has taught you some skills you can use to not allow this to affect you as badly this time if it continues


Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

25-10-05, 10:09

This sounds similar to my upbringing - I went through a period of very bad problems with my parents breakup when I was age 13-18.

I know how horrible it is to be so powerless as you sit and pray that the arguments are going to end and as you hope that everything will be OK. I am not surprised that you are having anxiety problems yourself because this situation is the one of the most unsettling things that can happen in a person's life.

How old are you Lisa? Do you have any family or close friends nearby that you could perhaps talk to about this? The absolute most important thing is that you find someone to talk to about this, and further to this it may also be a good idea for you to go to a family member's home to stay for a little while. Do you have grandparents, aunties, uncles nearby? It is important that someone close to you knows what is going on.

It is also important that you remember at all times that the fights are not about you, and that you personally are not in danger. Your parents are unhappy, it seems, but this does not mean that you have done anything wrong whatsoever. So often in these situations the people who suffer most are the innocent parties - i.e. you in this case.

Keep talking and keep opening up - it is vital that you give your emotions some expression, even if it feels bad to do so, keep nothing bottled up.

PM me if you want to talk more.


*** I think, therefore I'm anxious ***

27-10-05, 12:15
Hi Gareth,

thanks for taking the time to reply. Im 23 years of age so technically I could move out if i wanted to but i dont want to do that cause when we have good times they are good and for the last few years things have been good other than my own insecurites which i know was caused by the stuff my parents done and i saw them do. I do have an older brother and sister who i can talk to also my aunt is very good were really close and she knows whats gone on and is going on so i do have people to talk to its just soo hard watching the too paeople you love the most fight and argue it really hurts. my aunt said to me that if it starts again I have to move out cause I cant go through what i went through before mentally i cant take it but i also dont want to hurt my parents by saying Im moving out because of you. touch wood since the other night when they had a bad raw and my dad got really drunk things have been ok ive spoken to my dad and he says he isnt going to drink no more and that he is feeling a lot better but now i feel like there is a black cloud and im feeling insecure again not wanting to go out and leave them in case they start fighting, if im here i can stop it. hopefully its a one off and hings will be ok. I know they will have arguments cause all couples do and they are a very passionte couple i can ake the normal arguments its when drink gets involved and they start hitting eachother i cant take but hopefully that wont happen again and this is just a blip. thanks again for your reply if you ever need to talk you can pm me.