Anxiety showing at work for first time

[samj09]

hi,

i dont know if this is the right section so if not can an admin move please :)

Today at work I had a meeting, with two people i work with and three new people. this kinda worried me but to be honest i wasent too bad. anyway to cut a long story short I was walking into the room holding a glass of water and for some reason my hand started to shake and i couldnt really control it. This kinda freaked me out a lil bit and im so embrassed now as im sure even thou no-one said anything they all noticed it. I had to actually hold the glass with both hands and put it down on the table. i was mortified to say the least. Its really shook me up and im not sure what to do about it - Ive never been like that before, normally im fine with meetings and meeting new people etc.

I dont really know what else to say except im so embrassed to see these people again in case they think im some kinda of weirdo - this is probs the first time my anxiety/stress has shown so obviously. does anyone else get this?

[kate1]

Hi Sam,

1st of all, it dosent matter.

Have you felt this way before in any situations?

This can be nipped in the bud

[Maj]

Hi,

The last thing I'd think if I saw someone's hand shaking would be 'weirdo'! Don't place too much importance on this as anyone can have shakey hands. With or without anxiety. Having a meeting with new people would have been daunting for anyone. Please don't beat yourself up about this. It's a common anxiety symptom and doesn't mean it'll happen again.
Regards
Myra x

[samj09]

hi, thanks for your reply - im just worried about what these people think, i have to keep a good working relationship with them - im hoping they just thought i was rushing about or something stupid or didnt pay attention but im sure they did.

And not really - no where near this bad anyway. Ive felt nervous/anxious about stuff and got worked up before but nowhere near that bad - never shaking that much.

Also normally i get worried then a bit stressed out but i got nothing to start with - i walked down to the meeting room feeling fine and then i was all shaky - there was just no warning, no build up etc which i would of expected.

[samj09]

thanks myra :) it dosent either - it just shook me up abit as ive never had this before.

[kate1]

Hi Sam

sometimes things just hit us out of nowhere, we are not expecting it, it just happens. Unfortunately the mind can play tricks. Its a bugger the old head. But ultimately, nothing is going to harm you, nobody is going to pass any judgement, its only us battling with ourselves. Sounds like you have a really good job Sam, dont let these feelings change what you have acheived. Keep going

[Meewah]

Ummm...I am not so sure.

I am a very proud individual that even though I feel I dont fit in sometimes I hate being judged as this makes me feel useless which is in actual fact what I feel from time to time. I sometimes wonder why I am here? What can I offer to society?

The problem is I already have a low self worth. When I am out in groups I can come across as full of confidence. I wonder why I am here, what can I offer to society??

Combine this with a teenage incedent where I was so nervous that I spilt a hot cup of tea all over the floor and scoulded myself in the process and suprise suprise I developed a fear of being in front of others while holding a cup, glass, plate etc... almost anything that I can make a fool of myself if I drop it or spill it.

Now I fear that if I had the experience and knowledge I had today I would of exposed myself over and over to similar situations as quick as possible and keep doing it until I convince myself it was a one off.

The problem is I never did that. I ran away. I avoided holding anything hot or full. I used to use the excuse that I had sensitive hands and can they put the cup down on the table and I will get it. I would wait and bide my time before I found a space in the anxiety to take a drink and reduce its volume.

Now I live with it everyday it has spun out of control to the point that I cant eat a meal in public unless I feel totally relaxed with who I am with or I have had a few drinks.

It has spoilt my social life as I avoid those situations because I see the problem as so big now that I cannot expose myself in my current social circle. I would need to go far away and expose myself to complete strangers and make a total fool of myself and my ego just wont let me.

Please please please do this glass of water walking through work collegues again and again. Stand there and spill a little. Fill it to the top and walk through the office making full eye contact with everyone. Do not concentrate on the glass. Do it again with a hot cup of tea etc.... Repeat repeat repeat...

Take my advice you felt strongly enough about it to mention it on this forum so it has already had a lasting effect.

If you had a scary landing in a plane a shrink would tell you to repeat the flying experience again and again as quick as you can after the event, so start today, tomorrow.

You will destroy this thought. definitely.

Take Care.

Mee

[Lion King]

Top advice Meewah,

I have similar episodes with anxiety at work, I still get a little bit now but I try not to place too much focus upon it or dwell on it as this can impede my progress, as mee says, repeat the event, stay in the situation and the anxiety will fade away in time, you just need to prove it in your mind, just remember nothing bad will happen!

Take Care

LK

[Anxious_gal]

no one will think your weird! I personally can't hold heavy drinks in one hand as the weight always makes my hands shake, I just laugh it off n say i have shaky hands lol.
it's just a random tremor you got nones gonna think it was anxiety

[Meewah]

Mishel - Laugh on the outside and feel very small on the inside, yes??

I laugh when it happens to me but feel totally humiliated on the inside, it makes me more self conscious which focuses me on my issues and so the cycle starts again taking all the enjoyment out of an evening.


Mee