Is this Anxiety?

[Joellie]

Through reading symptoms of anxiety i dont seem to have it. However what else can i have that causes me to worry to the point where im crying over irrational thoughts of doubt and fear. I get this horrible gut clenching fear in me whenever i get these "attacks" i get them randomly and sometimes when i think about my relationship with my boyfriend, sometimes when i think about my future and its sometimes accompanied by depression which is at the moment also random!

Im worried im trying to blaim my doubts onto anxiety but i dont understand why i would doubt my relationship i love my boyfriend and i want to be with him, i never want to leave him but my head is telling me that i need to think about what ifs and is this love and am i just going to ruin this in the future.

I feel like a crazy person, i feel like my thoughts arent my own and that some horrible thing has come over me and is telling me that what ive felt the last 4 years is wrong and that i wont ever be happy with anyone else and that what if im not happy now! How can i argue with myself? it really is frustraiting.

Im off to the doctors tomorrow to tell him why i think im not feeling.. right

I litterally feel i dont think i can live feeling these things for the rest of my life. I feel liek il never be happy again.

What do you think??

[suzy-sue]

I think you definately need to see your Dr ,he/she will be able to diagnose you properly .You do sound anxious and the thoughts you are having are just a product of that they are just irrational thoughts .Depression can also make you doubt things too .Both can be treated and you can get well again . and feel happy again . Take care and let us know how you get on .Hugs Sue xx:hugs:

[Joellie]

Thanks sue yeah il post here tomorrow how it goes. Im nervious that i wont be able to explain how im feeling, everytime i try to explain to someone how i feel i just get really scared and cant find the words and im afriad he will turn me away and say im just being hormonal or somehting

[marcc64]

Sounds like a bout of anxiety to me too, people with chronic anxiety (thinking about stuff 24/7) for long periods of time usually develop physical symptoms to my knowledge.

[Joellie]

I don't think its chronic, I deffinately cant switch off or stop thinking about things but theres a difference to being anxious about things like driving tests etc and what i feel randomly. I worry about things in the normal way alot but theres certain subjects that bring on the "bad feeling" and its horrible, i just feel guilty for my boyfriend, I dont know why its targeting my relationship and i wish it will go.

[Bill]

i love my boyfriend and i want to be with him, i never want to leave him

am i just going to ruin this in the future.

Sometimes when something feels very important to us or we want something very badly etc, we end up putting alot pressure on ourselves because it creates a "fear of losing". This then creates emotional stress which then triggers our "worrying" so we then focus on all the "what if's" it all goes wrong.

We are sensitive people who are often intense and we also lack confidence in ourselves and our own abilities so any extra stress we experience will trigger "self-doubt".

This fear then runs into a loop because we then add extra pressure on ourselves by worrying that we're ill and because we feel so ill, we'll actually make everything go wrong which then compounds our worrying making us feel even more ill and so on.

The key to the "cure" is to learn how to remain calm and relaxed when we feel pressure or add pressure on ourselves.

There will be events in our lives that will Always feel Very Important at the time and in future years we often look back and think "what were we worrying about?". It's just anxiety that loves to torture us!

Try not to think of "what if's" but instead focus on "it Will be ok's". You love your boyfriend and he obviously loves you. Your only enemy is yourself and your "thinking processes" but if you learn how to relax, become less intense and believe in yourself as much as I'm sure your boyfriend believes in you, everything Will be ok because where there is love and trust in each other, nothing can come between you.

Try not to worry about 50 years down the road but instead think about enjoying "today" and let whatever will be, be........and you'll then have a long and happy life together.

Try to stop putting pressure on yourself by not worrying aout the future and you'll feel much better and everything Will be ok because you won't then create self-doubts for yourself.:hugs:

[Joellie]

Lol im terrible though, i cant switch off, ever. I always have to have plans, and its kind of an obsession, i have to plan things in advance or i feel unsettled in what im doing. Car journeys to places ive never been before are so bad, i have to memorise the directions or i freak out.

I just worry about my relationship but with the bad anxiety feeling it seems to make it worse, everyone has worries, these ic an handle just when that stomach feeling happens it feels like my life is over.

[Fran74]

Hello Joelle ,

You might be justgoing through a stressful time and might need
to look
inside you to find the reason why , as for my experience the more i try not to face my problems the more the anxiety takes over me -:)
I am sure your doc will help and let us know how you get on
p.s you r not going crazy

Take Care :hugs:
F

[Joellie]

I will do, im waiting for a call back at th emoment lol

I thought about whether its an underlying fear of something,but then i think what is there to face to get over it? I dont think i doubt my boyfriend, when i dont have these wierd attack things im perfectly fine and its all good. I feel like this problem is pressuring me to leave him when thats really not what i want.

Im glad that there are other people around who have been trhough this it makes me feel better. I was getting to the point of not trusting how i felt and so was getting myself upset because i was convinced that underneith i didnt love him but then my head was telling me that it cant be right because thats not how i feel.

[Joellie]

Just came back from the doctors, He has prescribed me some medication to slow the release of adrenalin to try and stop the horrible feeling from occuring.

[Panic33]

Gald you have seen GP Joellie. Out of interest what med did he prescribe?

[Fran74]

The problem with anxiety is that we r always thinking too much and questioning too much how we feel ..how we look..what we should or shouldnt do until we r not sure of anything anymore ...the medication will start working and you will feel the benefit so you will clearly see that what you want is staying with your partner ..so enjoy your happy relationship instead of questioning it
take care -:)

[hellbelle49]

Hi Joellie
So sorry to hear you are suffering this way, but I wanted you to know you are not alone. I also 4 and a half months ago was stuck down with total anxiety over my relationship.
We had a small insignificant argument and suddenly by brain told me he looked different. That uneasiness suddenly turned into full blown anxiety less than a week later and suddenly
I was having every nasty thought under the sun as to why we shouldn’t be together. I just suddenly felt we were really different, liked different things (even though this is true but we also like a lot of the same things) I thought our personalities were different, that he reacted differently to all my friends, basically anything became a trigger. It got so bad that I couldn’t go to work, couldn’t eat (still having trouble with that) and I couldn’t shut off all the thoughts in my head. Two weeks ago we broke up as the pressure and the state I was in got too much – I am not saying this will happen to you – but I also know that deep down I don’t want to let him go and have been in contact with him pretty much a lot of the time since we have split…its like I cant trust myself whilst I feel like this to go back there – but I must say that from joining this forum and by looking at another one called stuck in a doorway – my behaviour and symptoms point to OCD and I stumbled across something called ROCD – relationship OCD – check out the other forum and you will find posts on this.
Basically try not to worry – I know easier said than done and I cant really take my own advice as feeling like this for 4 and half months everyday really gets you down but we all got to keep going
If you want to private message me go ahead as only mentioned a tiny bit of stuff here.
Take good care
Hellbelle

[Joellie]

Hey everyone, Im on citalopram 20mg atm and its working a treat :) Ive been feeling much much better rarely any attacks at the moment and the relationship is really great at the moment too!

Thanks for the replies :) Dont worry hellbelle im sure you will be ok :D