Never been so scared

[Ireni]

Finding it hard to type this at all.

Lately it's been much harder to go outside because of HA, but I've always been able to do it with my 'safe person'. Something happened last night and now I can't leave the door, I'm completely terrified by being left alone. I cannot leave the house, which makes things complicated seeing as I can't go to college AND I can't even go to the doctor's.

I can't explain what happened in words, but it was very physical and didn't feel anything like anxiety. It's impossible to say ''I had x symptom'', but I'll try! I was sitting on the computer at about 4 AM (insomnia) and suddenly I felt really overhelming nausea, I was about to be sick. I got up quickly, feeling as though I was on fire. I felt as though my temperature had gone up and I was feverish. It was so sudden. Then I felt as though - this is the hard bit to describe - I was going to have a seizure. I was 110% convinced I was going to start having a fit there and then. It was a bit like something had gripped hold of my arms and body and was controlling me. My body felt as though it had been poisoned with something metallic. It was the worst thing I've felt in my life and I've had anxiety for years. It only lasted 3 minutes at the worst part but it seemed like hours. It took me longer to recover afterwards from the anxiety (i couldn't talk or stand up and was shaking and everything was swaying). It must be epilepsy. I can't think of anything else it could be. Now I'm scared in case it happens again. I can't see the doctor because, like I said, I can't go out.

What happened? Please, please, please help. I feel in a state of complete terror. I've never felt anything like that ever. Help.

[Anxious_gal]

can you be more detailed?
It really sounded like a panic attack.
for me I shake, I get dizzy, my body twitches and jerks, i can't breath, i feel too hot and i always think something must be terrible wrong.
one thing that helps me is taking my temperature because then i know its anxiety and i'm not really sick.
sounds like you have just hit a bump in the road. you need help now with your agoraphobia as soon as possiable, for me the only cure is leaving the house.
do you have any support?
maybe the doctor can come to your house?
maybe some sedatives for a day or too while you try to leave your house and go outside might help.
sorry your having such a bad time.
im on my way out the door soon, so ill check back with you later.
hugs x

[sandramick]

hi i agree with mishel it was probably a big panic attack , if your not sleeping things will feel a hundred times worse , i remember having one that soundslike this i was so hot thought i would combust , i no its really hard and takes a lot of getting over but try tobe strong we will not let anxiety beat us :winks:
all the best
sandra
xxxxx:bighug1:

[Ireni]

Thanks so much for replying. :flowers:

I don't think it was anxiety, though. I've had it for years and I'm sort of able to separate the 'real' symptoms from the anxiety ones. I know that the symptoms I experienced afterwards (e.g. the shaking, the swaying objects) was totally caused by panic; however, the feeling itself is something different and didn't follow the usual anxiety pattern of dizziness, palpitations and breathlessness. I do have some support, I just called my psychologist. I can't call the doctor out although I want to. They already think of me as a hypochondriac and if I can't explain what's wrong it'll be even worse.

More detail: It felt like a feeling in the pit of my stomach, like a wave of something that was going to rise and engulf me. I know this is hardly a factual description, but it's the only way I can explain it. I was not dizzy and I didn't feel faint, but it was as though I was on the verge of blacking out and losing control. I really don't think I can say anything more. It's so frustrating because the symptoms are nothing like anything you can put into words. If it helps to know, I used to have petit mal epilepsy or 'absences' when I was a child. They tested me years ago and told me I'd grown out of it. I suppose I have a lingering worry that they got it wrong or that I now have epilepsy again, but this time it's worse.

Thank you Sandra, I know lack of sleep makes everything worse.

[Bubblegumpixie]

Hi there
I don't know if this will help but I kind of get two types of panic attacks. One type is mild in comparison to the other. I get these on a daily basis and it is your typical over breathing, trembling, feeling really scared etc... But the other kind I don't get too often but they are horrendus! I had one yesterday and I was in a terrible state. I was shaking violently all over my body, my heart was pounding almost through my chest at an unbelievable rate (I was at my Dr's at the time of this one and he was amazed how fast my heart was going!) the colour literally drained from my lips and face and I was making no sense as I couldn't talk properly. When I tried to walk I was falling and stumbling all over the place and my body felt like it had been cut in two. From my waste up was light and weird feeling and waist down was heavy and felt wobbly. This lasted for about half an hour and it was so scary. It didn't feel like a regular panic attack but it was just one of the horrible ones that creep up on me occasionally. I know that this is a panic attack as my Dr has seen me have two of these and he said no matter how weird and not like a panic attack it feels, it actually is one.
I actually didn't stop trembling until the early hours of this morning!

I don't know if this will help but I hope it does as I was agrophobic for 18 months and I know how it feels hunny.:bighug1:

Bubblegum xxx

[Panic33]

This sounds like a major panic attack. I seem to have the major ones when I wake in the night. They are always less serve in the day.