mum2four
29-10-05, 02:56
It was shopping day day today and despite my 5am stress about what to do and what to bye spending more that $200 on the shopping I seem to have done better. I wasn't watching every around me so much. I was afraid to stand in the ile to find what i wanted. I wasn't concerned that i was talking to long and thinking I might be in some's way. I wasn't trying to talk my self out bye something that I new I needed. I was more relaxed about bying 2 of some thing to get ahead because I had extra money this ft. I was scared of running in to people when i tuen the corner to go to the next ile. I didn't keep checking the time or get frustrated at my son(asperger) for repeating price's and talking about thing that might bug other around me. I didn't panic as much when he was pushing the trolly that he might run into someone or the shelf's. I was still reminding him to be carfull but i didn't have to count or remind my self to breath and relax if i sow him doing some thing that might end up causeing him to crash the trolly. At the cheack out I was more relax about talking to the lady I didn't feel the need to plan what i was going to say. I didn't plan anything before I got the cheack out incase I made a mistake. Normal I would be reminding my self to say hello and getting all my card's out or checking how much money I had on me. I didn't reasses the thing's I got incase I really didn't need some thing. I didn't keep checking the price on the screan or worry that i wasn't unpacking fast enought or putting the bag's in trolly fast enought. I didn't feel like I was stacking the stuff on the counter badly. I didn't have to remind my self to concentrate on putting mt pin into the eftpos machine. My heart didn't jump out me cheact when I got distracted by my son and didn't put my pin in at timely fashion. I was worried about my son ringing his anuty about picking us up like she always dose. Or thinking about if I'm putting her out or something.
Over all far more relxed and didn't feel like the world was pulling me 1000 direction's. I could talk to my son better cause I wasn't trying so hard to focus on what i had to get. I didn't forget anything that i so far can tell and I normaly forget at least 5 important thing's. When I got home i didn't feel like i need to relax before putting the shopping away. I didn't feel my brain was to fried to deal with tiding up the cupbourd that my darling partner messes up when ever he cook's lol:D. i didn't feel like it was too much effort to clean out the fridge to put the new thing in. I didn't get frustrated that some one or my self a had made more mess for me to deal on top of the shopping. I just got right into it with out having to have a motavational speach to my self that could take up hour to finaly get me to just do it with out thinking. I'm sitting here now with knolage that when i walk in to my kitchen there is no mess waiting for me at all. MY KITCHEN is so CLEAN and that feels GOOD. I'm not sitting here avoiding my kitchen and not eating untill I decide that can handle cleaning it. I dont have to walk in to my kitchen and telling my self to ignore mess and I'll deal with later. I'm not stressing as much that my kids will make a mess of the kitchen after I cleaned it. My son just came to me to ask for a snack and I didn't have't to remind my self to not stress about the mess he'll make as much. I still have a niggling thought that he might make a mess but i didn't have to take a deap breath and tell my self to chill out.
Feeling good about my shopping day so far I'm not over thinking about what if i need that extra money for something els. The thoughts are there a little bit but no where near as intence as in the past. :D
Over all far more relxed and didn't feel like the world was pulling me 1000 direction's. I could talk to my son better cause I wasn't trying so hard to focus on what i had to get. I didn't forget anything that i so far can tell and I normaly forget at least 5 important thing's. When I got home i didn't feel like i need to relax before putting the shopping away. I didn't feel my brain was to fried to deal with tiding up the cupbourd that my darling partner messes up when ever he cook's lol:D. i didn't feel like it was too much effort to clean out the fridge to put the new thing in. I didn't get frustrated that some one or my self a had made more mess for me to deal on top of the shopping. I just got right into it with out having to have a motavational speach to my self that could take up hour to finaly get me to just do it with out thinking. I'm sitting here now with knolage that when i walk in to my kitchen there is no mess waiting for me at all. MY KITCHEN is so CLEAN and that feels GOOD. I'm not sitting here avoiding my kitchen and not eating untill I decide that can handle cleaning it. I dont have to walk in to my kitchen and telling my self to ignore mess and I'll deal with later. I'm not stressing as much that my kids will make a mess of the kitchen after I cleaned it. My son just came to me to ask for a snack and I didn't have't to remind my self to not stress about the mess he'll make as much. I still have a niggling thought that he might make a mess but i didn't have to take a deap breath and tell my self to chill out.
Feeling good about my shopping day so far I'm not over thinking about what if i need that extra money for something els. The thoughts are there a little bit but no where near as intence as in the past. :D