panic attacks and new baby

[lard]

Hi all
i suffer from ocd but a few weeks ago i suffered a massive panic attack and my ocd zeroed in on it and i spent weeks worrying about how i felt and my feelings.
After a sleepless monday night my wife gave birth to our second child, a boy, it was an amazing experience but extremely tiring(for her and me!)
They came back from hospital yesterday and our first night didnt go to well, the baby did as babies do and cried loads and was up most the night.
i ended up feeling angry and wound up, then i felt guilty for thinking that.
Anyway today i've felt odd all day and have just experienced a mini panic attack, i dont know what triggered it but it was horrible.
I am now worrying that it will last for ages like before, this is ment to be one of the happiest times of my life but my ocd seems to want to ruin it.
I love my daughter and new son so much and want to be the best dad i can but i worry my ocd will affect this, i hate it and dont deserve it.
I seem to feel a bit calmer and better now but dont want it to come back, any ideas as to what i should try?
thanks.
lard

[fishman65]

Hi Lard,I suffer with panic/general anxiety/social anxiety/depression.Becoming a father is one hell of a responsibility for any man let alone one like us who suffers with these kinds of disorders.After my daughter was born in 1999,I felt smothered by the responsibility and yes guilt that I should have been happy at what is supposed to be a happy time.Please try to remember that to feel panicky at this new baby in your life is TOTALLY natural.However,believe me it does get better in time.I soon learned that as long as a baby is fed,cuddled and its nappy changed,then thats all that is really needed.There are no special tricks etc.,just love your baby (which I'm sure you do) and all the rest will fall into place.Trust me I've been there.Please feel free to pm me if you like ok?You hang in there mate,

Take care now, Fishy