so stress at work

[alba]

i am so depressed again, i am really trying to cure myself but things always happen, always i am stress at work, i am so terribly bored and sick there, ther's alot of bullies there, previously as in my past post here, i am attacked by nacrissim office person that stress me till i am in depression. now i am attacked again by my other superior, i make some mistake in the report, and i have been trying my very best to do it well, and i 've checked it over and over so many times, but still there's mistakes, can't this person just correct me, sometimes i dont understand why there's ppl that r so so mean, so rude and so cruel that rather shout at you esp in front of alot of ppl to demoralize me, like shout in front of office ppl that i am very bad in work, useless, can't do easy job like that, like bringing me so so down, making me feel like s**t, or rubbish, yeah it hurts, becos i have been trying to do my best but i dont understand why must shout and scold. i feel quite down hearted and so low and so small when it happen, but i don't feel angry or upset, i just feel no feelings except for feeling how cruel this person is, and how low the person is, and i tried my best to understand this person position and keep quiet all along the way, but each time there's mistake this person jump and jump and i admit i may not be that good in my work, but i've never been appreciated in my work at all and never got any work promotion obviously i am not good in my work, what does this person expect me for, i am not high ranking executive i am only a small person, but it do hurts, it make me feel i am so stupid, so low, so down and so useless. i am feeling why is this world so cruel, there's no love and peace. i hve always been bullied beos i find it hard to express or explain myself. is it all my fault. but really at this workplace i 've been alot of hardshipl saddness, pain and hurt and disgrace by those inhuman ppl, i really wish i can stop working there and not work there anymore, i am making myself so thick to hv to meet them again next day, they knew they r all high position ppl so they can do anything. it's sad for me. i am really depressed and keep on thinking abt it, i don'tknow how to stop thinking of abt it, i can't sleep and no mood to talk to anybody , i feel so lost and alone. i am thinkign so much, should i stop working, but i can't i needed money to live, no way i can find job.

pls help me, what do u think i should do ? i am thinking of taking up course to upgrade my self to prove that i am not useless as what thi sperson and all said abt me. i hope to improve myself. i always feel myself so stupid useless and can't think, brainless, i can't think well.

or should i just resign andstay home and take care of my kids andhubby but my inlaws prefer me to work to get income, or should i change my jobscope, i would like to take up course on fashion mktg and change my line, take course and start new, but hubby say i can't study i am stupid. what should i do, i can't sleep tonight, still can't forgt the humilation i suffered today, i want to think what should i do to bring up my morale. i have long suffered depression all my life, now i am trying to combat this with peace in my heart.


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[Maj]

My goodness, your post gave me a lump in my throat. How much can a person take? It is very difficult to get a new job nowadays for anyone, it doesn't matter how many qualifications you have, but your workplace seems absolutely awful. It's one thing having a horrible office bully but it seems like a horrible workplace - full stop! No wonder you feel so low. It can't do anything for your self-esteem. I would seriously consider moving on, if you can. It's so difficult, I know, in this climate. You have to think about your health and well-being though and I can't see any reason why you should have to stay and put up with this. If you feel that you would like to study, why not? Don't let anyone put you off. You are not stupid. You only have one life - do it!! Think of yourself for once.
Kind regards
Myra:hugs:

[PanicOver!!]

Hi

Dont put yourself down
I work as a management consultant and only too often see managers bullying staff, its because they are inexperienced in management, the trouble is most of these people reach management positions far too early and think shouting at people is a strength when in fact it is a weakness. A good manager would discuss the problems in private and help coach you to acheive, so next time the shout try and remember it is only showing how bad they are as a manager x

[den68]

i feel for you. Im sort of in the same vote but im the manager and have 2 members of staff making my life impossible. Today i visited the doc and he signed me off and said i need to take antidepressants. Long term i am not sure that i can go back to the situation i have found myself in but like you cant afford to leave. I have never shouted at a staff member and have never had any problems with them in the first 5 years i worked there but now due to my sister in law having a personal issue with me its getting impossible and im gettingaccused of things that i simply havnt done. i never suffered such despair even when my brother died i feel totally hopeless to do anything about this situation. Sorry i cant give you any advice but if i figure things out ill let you know.

[PanicOver!!]

Hi Denise

Not sure about your circumstances but staff can bully too
what made the situation arise only after five years? (if you dont mind me asking)
Please feel free to pm me if you want to

[alba]

thank,i am so streesss and depress andhaving headache now. i know i am not good at my work, so i never ask for pay raise or promotion becos i know everyone there feels i am useless, not capable, becos i am shy quiet person, so i keep things to myself. i was builled badly by nacrissim person(i cna't spell) i did post it here previously and suffered. now this person it's been few times i am treated this way by this different person mayb e a superiror, i know this person got very bad temper but i tried my best to do well, but still bad, no choice, but sadden me this person shouted and humilated me in front of everyone of my incapablility. it's sad, i tried to control, i felt so numb inside, i feel strong and hurt, i am lost, i don't know what i felt but i know i am humiliated. i don't know what to do now, pls help me, open up my distress and i need to be happy again, ican't take it, but no one understand me esp at home esp with families, they expect me to be successful at work.

i want to take up courses and forget abt all this bad expereince, but they say i need money and can't run away from bad things, i must fight , but tell me how to fight all this emotion?

[alba]

Hi Denise

Not sure about your circumstances but staff can bully too
what made the situation arise only after five years? (if you dont mind me asking)
Please feel free to pm me if you want to

i don;t know it just happen, there's this person who is very bad tempered and it's been long throw temper at me, but this is the worst, with humilation, previously not bad, just simple anger, but nowadays really humilating me in front of everyone, for small mistakes.

and another one that is very poisonous person that is very inconsiderate that bullies me and wnated to bring me down badly when i did nothing wrong to this person just a small misunderstanding , this person is full of ego and think too highlyof itself so got angry with me for something and continued to attack me till now also shoutinjg and throwing things at me. so now i got 2 attackers. i really hate going to work, but i got no choice. all these had happened more than 5yrs ago, it is on going till now.

[alba]

i don;t know it just happen, there's this person who is very bad tempered and it's been long throw temper at me, but this is the worst, with humilation, previously not bad, just simple anger, but nowadays really humilating me in front of everyone, for small mistakes.

and another one that is very poisonous person that is very inconsiderate that bullies me and wnated to bring me down badly when i did nothing wrong to this person just a small misunderstanding , this person is full of ego and think too highlyof itself so got angry with me for something and continued to attack me till now also shoutinjg and throwing things at me. so now i got 2 attackers. i really hate going to work, but i got no choice. all these had happened more than 5yrs ago, it is on going till now.
I AM SO SORRY I THOUGHT U R ASKINGME, YEAH ME TOO MORE THAN 5YRS HAPPNEING TO ME, ON AND OFF, SORRY, I M TOO STRESS TO READ YR POST PROPERLY U R NOT ASKING ME, BUT I JUST WANT TO SHARE.

[alba]

I Am So Distressing Until I Can't Breathe Properly, I Can't Think, I Got No Mood To Talk When At Home, I Am So Lost, I Can't Do Anything, I Feel Like I Can't Swallow My Food, My Heart Is Beating Fast, I Can't Sleep All Nite, There's So Manythings In My Brain, I Am Sure All Those Other Bullies Must Be Laughing Happily To Hear I Am Humilated. I Am So Sick Now. Sometimes I Feel This World Is So Cruel.why Must They Bringpain To Others, My Head Feel So Hard And Stiff. Actually Ia M Not Angry With The Person, I Am Just Wnating To Think What Am I Suppose To Do Now, Stop Work, Find Course, Upgrade Myself, But They Say No I Can't Run Away From Problems, Do U Think So?

[den68]

alba can you go to docs and get a sick note. It may give you some space to think about what to do in the long term

[Maj]

Yes, if you can, go to your doctor and explain how you feel. An understanding doctor should be able to help you. It is the person at work who has the problem - not you. Just because you are quiet and shy doesn't mean that people have to bring you down. You are better than this. If I worked there I'd always be making mistakes because I'd be a nervous wreck!! Listen to your heart and know that you are not stupid and you deserve better treatment and understanding from people. I hope that you get this all sorted out.
Kind regards
Myra:hugs:

[alba]

i couldn't sleep at all tongiht, it is bad, i turn and turn still cannot sleep, eyes so wide open and brain is full of stuff, i keepon thinking what i will do if i m not working, where to getmoney and how> i am so worried how to survive. i am so stress now. i am thinking of giving myself 8more months to work to ern a bit, then what can i do. what will u all do first if u r in my position? will u still continue working there? i just couldn't take it, my brain is exploding, but my families all counting on me to work, help.

[alba]

i have been stress at work on Monday get scolding * shouted at and it hurts my feelings and morale badly. i am do sad abt it, i tried not to thinking abt it, but sitll it is is always in mymind.
on wednesday onwards, i start to feel sick, thursday nite last night i cannot even sleep, actually i can't sleep on that monday nite itself, tues also i can't sleep well keep thinking alot, wednesday start hving headache, and a bit chest discomfort. the wrost is lsst nite i feel so sick, at night when i lie down to sleep i started to think so much, then i feel chest so pain, and so heavy feeling linke a heavy huge thing reting on my chest , i feel pain and breatheless and really chest feel so tight, heavy and discomfort till today firday,. i am so tired, sleepy and headache. and chest pain, hate this feeling, it stop for a while esp during my holiday from work.

when i ask the doctor he say it is fearing at work that cause u to feel chest pain, don't understand what he say

[suzy-sue]

Alba ,your Dr means you are feeling like you are because of the anxiety it causes you thinking about your job.Your job is causing you a great deal of worry and stress .It is anxiety that is causing all these symptoms .You do not get any support from your family about this , either which is not helping .You really need to think very hard about whether this job is worth feeling so unwell.Its a terrible situation when you need the money ,but im afraid things will never be any better whilst you work in such a bad enviroment ..Take care Sue x