View Full Version : My story so far....
Hi everyone, have been visiting this fab web-site for nearly 2 months now and i thought i would give a brief update of my 1st time experience with Citalopram [20mg], and indeed depression.
I am currently on day 44 of the meds and the first thing i would like to say [and this is only my personal experience], is that contrary to what the GP and info leaflet with the meds is that after 2 wks the SE's do not settle!! I began to see some real improvement during wk 5!
The first 28 days were pretty horrific to be honest, I was all over the place....coping [or actually not at all!] with the realisation that I was depressed and then trying not to lose my head with feeling worse then when i was orginally diagnosed!
Last week I had a really good week and felt I was finally coming back to my 'old self' and started to feel the benefits of what others had said on NMP.
Unfortunately, these last 2 days [Day 43, 44], I have slipped back somewhat and have major despair and really bad anxiety....I have a feeling that it might be to do with the fact that I am due my period on Friday???? Or is it just a very bad and long 'blip'???
Isnt it funny that on my good days, I have not needed to visit NMP - and now I am searching all threads for some hope??? Aint depression funny [or not???!]
PS Insomnia has never really improved for me on these meds....apart from last week when ironically it was my 'good' week....
Any support would be welcome xx:winks:
Well its been 4wks for me now on 20mg and its been pretty up and down. Week 1 was awful and I wouldnt have got through it without valium. After 2weeks I started to notice an improvement and was able to out and about seeing friends, doing shopping ect but last week I had a blip. Felt anxious and on edge constant, nearly jumped out my skin if someone came to the door or if the phone rang, was over emotional and generally feeling down. Started my period monday and had a really intense panic attack that day that seemed to last forever, however things are calming down again. Still not sure if meds are making much improvement as yet...Yeah I am definately less anxious and having less panic attacks but still tired alot and feeling like I have no motivation to do anything almost like I am depressed now (was prescribed meds for anxiety/panic not depression). My son is only 8wks old so I think I might have a touch of PND aswell. Have my postnatal with the gp on friday so will tell her how I feel and she might increase the dose. Hope things settle for you soon x
Hi everyone, have been visiting this fab web-site for nearly 2 months now and i thought i would give a brief update of my 1st time experience with Citalopram [20mg], and indeed depression.
I am currently on day 44 of the meds and the first thing i would like to say [and this is only my personal experience], is that contrary to what the GP and info leaflet with the meds is that after 2 wks the SE's do not settle!! I began to see some real improvement during wk 5!
The first 28 days were pretty horrific to be honest, I was all over the place....coping [or actually not at all!] with the realisation that I was depressed and then trying not to lose my head with feeling worse then when i was orginally diagnosed!
Last week I had a really good week and felt I was finally coming back to my 'old self' and started to feel the benefits of what others had said on NMP.
Unfortunately, these last 2 days [Day 43, 44], I have slipped back somewhat and have major despair and really bad anxiety....I have a feeling that it might be to do with the fact that I am due my period on Friday???? Or is it just a very bad and long 'blip'???
Isnt it funny that on my good days, I have not needed to visit NMP - and now I am searching all threads for some hope??? Aint depression funny [or not???!]
PS Insomnia has never really improved for me on these meds....apart from last week when ironically it was my 'good' week....
Any support would be welcome xx:winks:
Your story is almost identical to mine!
Even down to the increased anxiety around the time of your period - I had the worst night's anxiety last week...and bingo! my period arrived the next morning. I felt really depressed for the next 2 days (worse than I was before I took the citalopram), but this week (week 6) has been great so far - no depression, no anxiety.:)
I started off on 20mg, had horrendous side effects so immediately went down to 10mg, and have just upped to 15mg.
I spent the first 3 weeks feeling much worse than I did when I asked the GP for the pills - I really did feel like I was falling apart and losing my mind.
However, I can definitely see the light at the end of the tunnel now, and very much hope that my stay on citalopram willl be a brief one.:):):)
I did want to mention some advice [again this is only from my own point of view, and not scientific!!] that I found helped me to deal with the horrific SE's....
- drinking lots and lots of water to compensate the dry mouth
- breakfast - even though after 6 weeks it is still hard to have an appetite
- no alcohol
- yoga [my first time ever trying it]
- crying! Believe it or not it is cathartic - for me anyway!
- this one I am not proud of!! Smoking excessively....eek!
Unfortunately due to bad PMS, I need to talk myself into remembering that last week was a good week, and hopefully this is only a temporary setback. Thanks for the comments girls...x
Hi Waterfall
How are you getting on? Have you got over your 'blip'
Bexie
Hi Waterfall, how are you getting on? :hugs:
I can really empathise with what you were saying. When it says on the leaflet about the side effects calming down after a couple of weeks... :whistles::doh: No! For me I didn't feel settled for quite a while. As the weeks went on I wasn't exeriencing the side effects as strongly, but they were still there; that sense of tiredness, waking up in the middle of the night feeling frightened, lack of appetite and those ugh headaches, and things like that.
I think it can be really a big blow to have a 'bad' day, after having some good days. I was talking about it with my mum recently and I said I get so frustrated and upset when I get into a blip, because I've known what its like to start feeling ok again... only to somehow fall back what feels like 10 steps! I told my gp about it a few months ago and he said to imagine my mood like a planet, and everytime I feel like I'm slipping into the 'night', to just hang on because 'day' will come around again :shades::blush:
Hi guys
end of wk 7 now and some better days thankfully....still feel disconnected/disengaged at times...like i am not still really myself if you know what i mean?? i have not really found many comments that relate to this - so maybe its just me!! my mind is constantly full of thoughts [like its on overdrive!] and i find it too difficult to watch the news or read the newspapers...they just fill me with more doom and gloom. I also get really frightened that my family might die; how bizarre is that????
budgie i liked the idea of what your gp said to you.
i have a mantra myself which my friend told me to keep in my mind "this too will pass" x
Waterfall! Its so good to hear how you're doing :hugs: I'm so glad to hear how you've had some better times :)
I can understand what you mean about the disengaged feeling. I often try to explain it to my family and friends, but its difficult to describe that sensation of just... sort of being there, but not there :unsure: Its like everything isn't 'real' to me at all. I still get like this, but not as often :) I used to find it so hard to concentrate on anything before I started taking the Cit, and then, for a while once I began taking it, I just couldn't focus on reading or watching tv, or conversations -- but!! I am so excited to say that in time this concentration WILL come back! :yesyes: I've started reading again since the summer and have gone through so many books! So I feel confident in saying that I think the fuzzy muddling situation you're going through at the moment won't be permanent, and I won't be able to find you because you'll be buried in newspapers! :hugs:
budgie, you are a star!!:hugs:
am looking forward to those days when i can be 'myself' again.
can i ask you how long you've been on the meds for? [you've prob said it already, but my memory has gone completely...SE's prob!!!] xx
Hi all my doctor put me on citalopram 20mg last wednesday but since taking them my anxiety has been really bad and ended up at the hospital sat night they told me to carry on taking the tabs but i feel so much worse racing heart shaking hot sweats not eating or sleeping out of breath and i feel i'm going mad i no its early days yet but did anyone else get these symtoms and how long did they last i don't think i can carry on like this:weep:
bluejeans17
27-10-09, 16:59
I have been on these meds for 6 months and it is really only the last month that I have been feeling normal again. The worst of the side effects lasted for several weeks - the worst was the feeling of anxiety when I woke up in the mornings and a tension headache started in week five which lasted for about 12 weeks but has gone now. I still have problems sleeping - I don't sleep right through the night any more but apart from that I feel pretty good. I think it is very important to eat properly - little and often is good advice and drink plenty of water. Another piece of advice is to keep busy. I joined the gym and exercise definitely helped me.
Don't give up - it may take longer than you expect - everyone is different. It has been a tough journey and I still have the 'not so good day' but that's pretty normal anyway! I used to dread the dark evenings but this year it doesn't seem so bad.
I agree this is a brilliant site - it really helped me through the dark days knowing that I wasn't alone in how I was feeling.
Keep the Faith!
BJ
budgie, you are a star!!:hugs:
am looking forward to those days when i can be 'myself' again.
can i ask you how long you've been on the meds for? [you've prob said it already, but my memory has gone completely...SE's prob!!!] xx
Hey rthere, waterfall! :hugs:How are you feeling today?
I've been taking the cit since the end of January :yesyes: I found it did take some time for them to get going with me, I think it was around July that I really started to feel so much better, when I raised my dose to 40mg, and since then I have been getting better and better! :yesyes:
hi Budgie
not a great day today to be honest....start of wk 9 today and anxiety is bad today....worried a lot today about random things - parents/brothers and sisters dying [death of loved ones plays a lot on my mind....dont know if this has happened to you?] i am thinking of going up to 30mg??? did you start on 20mg?
v glad that you are on the mend....was good to hear from you xx hope i am not annoying you...
bluejeans17
27-10-09, 20:45
Me too Waterfall - I thought about me dying, my partner dying...... really horrible but honestly it will pass. I just don't know where the random thoughts come from. That is why it is best to keep busy - keep your mind occupied.
Stick with it - think how bad you felt in the early days and look at how many good days you have now in comparison to bad ones.
I thought that that 20 mg wasn't working but it did eventually.
Hope you start to feel better soon.
BJ
You are right BJ - the rational side of me knows that!
thanks for your lovely message
i know that it is prob just a bad day....i just thought that after 2 months - the anxiety would have disappeared! [yesterday for example, i was thinking of dropping down to 10mgs!!] as the song goes "what a difference a day makes"....
here's hoping tomorrow will be a better day xx
Hi Waterfall!! :hugs:
No, of course you aren't annoying me! :D Its great to chat with you!
I'm sorry though, that you have had a bad time of it though :hugs:
I started at first on 10mg, and after a few weeks I went to 20mg, which I stayed on for quite a few months. I found I just wasn't feeling any benefits, and felt really down. I went to see my P about it, and wondered if this medication wasn't right for me, but he suggested trying 40mg, and, since then... :yesyes:
I still get anxious, though, even now. I think I have a lot of work to do on this side of things. I worry a alot about people dying. Some days, if my mum mentions going to the shop for some milk or something, I am freaking out until she's back at home! Or I will go with her just because I am so worried about something happening :wacko: :blush: Its so weird, because I go out in my driving lessons and don't even think about road dangers, but then at night I can lie awake for hours worrying about all kinds of bizarre things! I have told my doctor about this, and he suggests that when my CBT course eventually comes through, this might be really useful to change my thought/worry patterns. But in the meantime I keep myself as busy as I can with hobbies; omgosh, I bought one of those scale model kits last week, because they can keep a person busy for hours!
Hope you're ok -- keep posting!
Hi budgie!
i am exactly the same!! worried about my parents and family dying etc..............also the whole living my life like i am watching it as an outsider are symptoms i wish would stop asap!!!!
i started on 30mg today [was supposed to last month but was too scared!!]
am also waiting on CBT so hopefully that will help!! you keep in touch too xx
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.