weeza
14-10-09, 19:57
Hi everyone This site is great cant believe i didnt find it sooner! Anyway this is my story. Im 31 and ive been suffering from anxiety for about 16 years. It all started when i was 15 and sitting in a french lesson, i started to feel really faint and thought i was going to pass out although i didnt. From there i started not going to french lessons as i associated it with the feeling of passing out and things just got worse soon i was avoiding places and situations where i had had panic attacks. I even stopped getting the school bus and started getting public transport to school. Once i left school and started college things calmed down but when i was 19 i met and moved in with an alcoholic and the panic and anxiety got so much worse. I lefft him after 6 months and moved back home but one day everything became too much and i had a huge attacke and was convinced that if i left the house i would die. Up untill this point i had never told anyone about the anxirty etc. I rang my mum at work and poured everything out to her, she came home and took me straight to the gp. He gave me Valium to clam me down and put me on citalopram 20mg. I went home and became really agraphobic but with the support of my mum and my cpn i got better. Soon after i met someone and moved to wales to live with him. By this time i had come off the citalopram and was doing really well. I fell pregnant and then miscarried, again the anxiety and panic got really bad so it was back on the pills. I carried on taking them for the next 5 years or so coming off them once in this period but getting so anxious i went more or less straight back on them. Follwoing a marriage and then divorce i moved back to surrey and came off the tablets in 2005. I was off them for approx 9 months before i had another episode of anxiety and couldnt cope so i went back on them. I have been taking 20 mg of citalopram since then.
However my anxiety has been getting increasingly worse. My "thing" at the moment is that im going to drop dead. In the past its been fear of passing out or being sick.
Anyway what i really wanted to say is that anxiety has controlled my life for 16 years. In the last few days something in me has clicked and im not prepared to accept that this will be my life forever. Im going to the GP on monday and im going to ask for an ECG and im also going to talk to her about my tablets. I do believe that anxiety will always be with me but i now feel that i can be in control i just need to know how to deal with it and i think this site is going to be a big paret of that. Anyway sorry for going on but its actually helped me to write it all down. One of my other "things" has always been that if i dont talk about anxiety and panic attacks they arent really happening. Not anymore! Anxiety and panic have ruined the last 16 years of my life but im determined they wont ruin anymore! I will keep you updated on how im getting on, please feel free to chat to me or say hi. Also i work with people who suffer with all different health conditions anxiety and panic being a high % of this. I support people with returning to work. If anyone would like any advice if they are looking to return to work or if they are having problems with their employer etc then im willing to give my advice (totally my opinion only though)
Thanks for listening love Lou xxxxx:)
However my anxiety has been getting increasingly worse. My "thing" at the moment is that im going to drop dead. In the past its been fear of passing out or being sick.
Anyway what i really wanted to say is that anxiety has controlled my life for 16 years. In the last few days something in me has clicked and im not prepared to accept that this will be my life forever. Im going to the GP on monday and im going to ask for an ECG and im also going to talk to her about my tablets. I do believe that anxiety will always be with me but i now feel that i can be in control i just need to know how to deal with it and i think this site is going to be a big paret of that. Anyway sorry for going on but its actually helped me to write it all down. One of my other "things" has always been that if i dont talk about anxiety and panic attacks they arent really happening. Not anymore! Anxiety and panic have ruined the last 16 years of my life but im determined they wont ruin anymore! I will keep you updated on how im getting on, please feel free to chat to me or say hi. Also i work with people who suffer with all different health conditions anxiety and panic being a high % of this. I support people with returning to work. If anyone would like any advice if they are looking to return to work or if they are having problems with their employer etc then im willing to give my advice (totally my opinion only though)
Thanks for listening love Lou xxxxx:)