My ex had anxiety and I couldn't deal with it

[Rachelle]

Hi,
I have not joined this forum as a sufferer of anxiety, but as the former partner of a sufferer. I'm 32 and I went out with a guy a year older than me for 8 months. He began suffering from panic attacks 6 months before we met. The first three weeks he suffered major attacks, including at night, he couldn't go to work and was confined to his house with short term and long term medication. By the time we met he had stopped taking the short term medication (Clonex) and was on a low daily dose of anti-depressants. The attacks came back, albiet not as strong as they were before, about 3 months into our relationship. It was terrible seeing him suffer from these attacks. He also had anticipation of anxiety and it was worrying when we went out somewhere, like a restaurant or a play or meeting friends. I don't think I was competent enough to deal with his anxieties and it was one of the factors that weighed in to our break up.
I'm interested to know from members of this forum how your anxieties have affected your relationships and how your partners dealt with it. Thanks

[diane07]

Hi Rachelle

A huge warm welcome to nmp.

You'll get loads of advice and support here and make some lovely friends along the way.

Best wishes

[mandyclare]

Hi Rachelle.. first of all what a wonderful person you must be for caring enough to find out more about a condition that doesn't affect you. Don't feel badly about not being able to cope with your ex partner's condition... it really is a hard thing to understand i'm sure if you don't suffer from it yourself.

I worry constantly when my anxiety is bad about going out.. the thought of a theatre trip for me at the moment (suffering from regular palpatations) is just horrendous and I consider myself to have mild general anxiety disorder compared to most.

Nobody i know in 'real life' can fully support me because they just cannot understand the condition and I understand that. I think this site is wonderful for people who suffer from these problems because it gives them a chance to talk to others with the same or similar symptoms and makes you feel less alone with it.

I think reading the threads here will make you see that anxiety can be very disabling to people's lives.. I am sure you will recognise symptoms some of us mention from those you saw in your partner.

Maybe if you are still in touch with him you could give him the link to this site.. it may help him.

All the best

Mand :)