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LisaLisa
26-10-09, 15:42
im so sorry for bothering everyone again. Im really scared again. about my cheek i read soething last week about a type of tumour that grows in the salivary gland in hiv and i have all the signs and symptoms of it. I just looked it up again and its seems so like what i have.

Can someone please help me i feel sick and cant do this again

Lisa
xxxx

PanicOver!!
26-10-09, 15:44
Hi Lisa

Sorry you are feeling down again
Dont ever think you are bothering people we are all in this together
You really must sto self diagnosing if you are thet worried go and see a real doctor
im sure there are 100 things it COULD be but you only find the worst ones when Googling

Take care x

rebeccad
26-10-09, 15:48
Lisa you really do need to stop reading medical articles and google!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I seem to remember a reply that you sent to me about not seeking reassurance from the internet?? your idea not mine lol. You are not a doctor and you cannot diagnose yourself from something which you have read, if that were the case why would docs need to go to medical school for years and years and then gain lots of work experience before they are even alloud near a patient. I know im sounding like a hipocrit(not sure on spelling lol) and i have done it so many times always thinking you will find something to reassure you but instead you find something that scares the living day lights out of you. I even used to visit the ms groups on facebook how sad is that lol. Lisa seriously there is no way you could have HIV how could you with all those tests. You would have to be about the only person ever to have so many tests and still have it. I have a gland in my neck that is raised and have done since i was about 13 i also have one behind my ear, i had my doc look at it and he said it was fine. Have you thought about going back to docs and asking for some more help and really explaining how bad you actually feel?
Take care hun

xxxx

LisaLisa
26-10-09, 15:58
thanks both of you. I know google is not a dr but why does it have to sound sooooooo like what i have and why is there nothing i read that it could be instead?

Im so very worried for my baby. She is one next week and i cant handle this anymore. Whay is this happening. If I dont havehiv then why isthis thing in my cheek. Why dont i have the courage to go to the drs and find out for sure. Why do i stupidly just keep trying to reassure myself that my tests cant be wrong.....

am i crazy or just not brave enough to face up to this? Im so selfish becuase if my baby needs treatment im just doing nothing about this

Im so sory to go on and on i just cant take anymoer

rebeccad
26-10-09, 16:04
Lisa you are not selfish and your daughter does not have hiv. As for the doctor thing i know how you feel because i cannot bring myself to take the mri that my mom is offering to pay for its that feeling of what if they actually do say ive got it. But ask yourself could you feel any worse? probably not. Book yourself an appointment and just get them to check it the feeling of relief that you will get when they say your fine will be well worth it. Honestly Lisa you are fine and it is your anxiety that is making you feel this way perhaps they stopped your cbt to early?

take care Lisa xxx

LisaLisa
26-10-09, 16:33
Okay i checked again and i think i have misread it. It said it is in the salivary gland under the tongue. This is in my cheek so it cant be the same, so im back where i was before my stupid googling. I feel a lot better even though i still dont know what it is though.

Guys thank you so much foe replying. I really appreciate you answering me so quickly becuase i really have not panicked that much ina long time. Im starting to feel very depressed and i think its making the panic come quicker now.

M worrier im so very sorry to hear that happened to your sister and i will be thinking of you both until its resolved for her. Thank you so much for your kind words , speaking to people like you makes this horrible nighmare more bareable.

Thanks rebbecca i know you are right. why oh why cant i just be stricter with myself about this constant obsessing over my cheek. There is absolutely no way i can go to the dr, i am petrified. You shouldnt feel that way about MRI becuase you dont need it, you really dont becuase the dr has said. I feel like by not going back to the dr to have my salivary gland looked at again , is the only reason that the dr isnt telling me the worst.

Thanks everyone so much

Lisa
xxxxx

PanicOver!!
26-10-09, 16:34
Take care Lisa

And dont Google x x

LisaLisa
26-10-09, 16:41
Thanks marc

Yet another sharp google learning curve

Lisa
xxxxxxxx

PanicOver!!
26-10-09, 17:07
Hey dont worry we have all done it!!