Pretty upset

[SleeplessFog]

I went to see my therapist with who I am doing CBT with...have been for the past 5 months.

I have been trying very hard to do this without medication. I am a huge pharmacophobe. For those who don't know, I also suffer from PTSD as a result of my sister's death. She died from complications of an organ transplant after having a lung disease all of her life. She took up to 40 meds a day, and it was a lot of drugs, and a lot of those drugs made her susceptible to other stuff....so that's why I am a pharmacophobe.

Anyways, my therapist had me authorize her to talk to my GP about medication. I am so afraid of taking anything...especially since I tried Lexapro in April and it was horrible! I had hallucinations, multiple panic attacks in my sleep and a whole bunch of other crap that wasn't happening before that. I only took 1/2 of a 10mg pill too.

I am so low about myself right now....I will probably have to have a medication evaluation now. I don't want to do this with meds...I am so afraid of medication. I just had my first breakthrough (I feel) about a week ago when I was able to successfully shut down a PA while I was driving.

Someone please reassure me I can get through this...I don't want to take anything like an SSRI....not after what happened to me before. I usually don't take any medication unless someone is around to make sure I am okay. My therapist doesn't think I have depression...its just a lot of anxiety.

:weep::weep::weep:

[Cell block H fan]

I went to see my therapist with who I am doing CBT with...have been for the past 5 months.

I have been trying very hard to do this without medication. I am a huge pharmacophobe. For those who don't know, I also suffer from PTSD as a result of my sister's death. She died from complications of an organ transplant after having a lung disease all of her life. She took up to 40 meds a day, and it was a lot of drugs, and a lot of those drugs made her susceptible to other stuff....so that's why I am a pharmacophobe.

Anyways, my therapist had me authorize her to talk to my GP about medication. I am so afraid of taking anything...especially since I tried Lexapro in April and it was horrible! I had hallucinations, multiple panic attacks in my sleep and a whole bunch of other crap that wasn't happening before that. I only took 1/2 of a 10mg pill too.

I am so low about myself right now....I will probably have to have a medication evaluation now. I don't want to do this with meds...I am so afraid of medication. I just had my first breakthrough (I feel) about a week ago when I was able to successfully shut down a PA while I was driving.

Someone please reassure me I can get through this...I don't want to take anything like an SSRI....not after what happened to me before. I usually don't take any medication unless someone is around to make sure I am okay. My therapist doesn't think I have depression...its just a lot of anxiety.

:weep::weep::weep:
I cant take meds like that either sleeplessfog :hugs: And to be honest, I dont want to now. I took 2 doses of 10mg years ago, & the side effects had me thinking I was dying. Never would try it again thats for sure. I think some people cant take things like that, & some cant, end of.
You have already proved you can cope with this without any meds. You're not depressed, as you say. Stay strong, keep reminding yourself how you dealt with the PA, & eventually it will become easier hopefully xxxxx

[SleeplessFog]

Thanks for the reply. I just think I am really too sensitive to prescription meds. Antibiotics seem to be okay. When I took the Lexapro I had a lot of dehydration and a lot of visits to the loo. Not fun.

Maybe when I go for the med evaluation...they won't have to give me anything. Trying to stay positive....sigh.

[PanicOver!!]

Hi

Remember you dont Have to take anything its your body
anxiety can be beaten without meds as there is no "magic" cure its something we all have to work at
the meds make it easier but they do not cure it even if you take meds you will want to come off at sometime so if you can beat this without then go for it

best of luck xx

[SleeplessFog]

Hi

Remember you dont Have to take anything its your body
anxiety can be beaten without meds as there is no "magic" cure its something we all have to work at
the meds make it easier but they do not cure it even if you take meds you will want to come off at sometime so if you can beat this without then go for it

best of luck xx

I know I don't have to take anything....I know there is no magic cure...I just feel like it will be a temporary fix and then when I am taken off of it, it won't solve the problem, I have to solve the problem.

I guess I am being too hard on myself. :blush:

[Alisonj]

I am so sorry you are struggling. I use to be terrified of meds and I am still uncomfortable with any new ones unless I do alot of my own research on them.
Your sisters death was such a horrible tragedy in your life, the same with my dads death. I am not the same person I was before it happened and never will be. What I have begun to realize lately though, is that I am not sure if I properly grieved my dads passing. It was all such a blur and destroyed me so much that I dont believe I have taken the time to grieve. I am not sure if that is the case with you and your sisters passing at all but it may be something to consider especially with PTSD. Sending you lots of hugs and strength.