Going crazy......

[Desprate Dan]

For awhile now i fear i am loseing my identity and going crazy..

I ask myself

WHO AM I ?

WHATS MY PURPOSE IN LIFE ?

AND WHAT DO I WANT FROM LIFE ?

WHATS THIS LIFE ALL ABOUT ?


I have no answers to these questions, i keep running them over and over in my head and i feel like i cant concentrate on anything else, i feel so lost and dont know what to do with myself and i feel like i am going out of my mind..

I am currently doing CBT and i have been given a mindfulness CD to listen to so when thoughts come into my head i have to switch them off my concentrating on my breathing, the thing is if you keep switching them off how do i ever answer the questions and get a solution (If there is one).

Does anyone else suffer constant anxiety about themselves not knowing who they really are or what they really want from life it seems i have no real desires anymore...

Please help

Dan

[pembrokeshire lady]

Hi Dan ,
I have been feeling this too . Do you have family and friends that love you , cos I do and to be honest it makes the whole thing even more crazy as it seems impossible that a woman like me should feel this when I have all them.
Things that other people look forward to , I dont . I dread holidays , my anxiety just forced me back from a holiday after one day. My poor family had to drive me home, in disbelief that I hated it , the look on their faces was making the guilt worse . I feel like I live in a lonely bubble that noone else understands , so I do understand you , do you take any tablets ? I take seroxat and its the only thing keeping me going . Its helped me to enkoy things a little bit , without seroxat I would probarbly have not left this house for ten years.

[Desprate Dan]

Thanks for your reply Pembrokeshire lady, I have my Mother and Sister and a small group of friends, who i feel so guilty for burdening them with my trouble as they dont really understand so i tend to keep it all locked away inside and not let them know how bad i am feeling.

I have lost all my desire for life and the enjoyment i once had for my hobbies, i constantly feel so tired and exhausted i get very little sleep and have terrible nightmares and strange dreams, and i too feel like i am in a lonely bubble and i cant see an end to it..

Yes i am on medication, i am on 40mg Citalopram and 80 mg Propanolol once a day but to be honest i am not sure how much good they are actually doing, i have been on meds since April, i was really hopeing for a vast improvement but really feel as if they arn't really doing the job, yes it maybe has taken a bit of the edge off my Anxiety but feel so tired with no enthusiasm to do anything, it really worries me.

DAN