stuck and do not know what to do (job)

[mummy4]

evening all

few months ago i applied for a job as a home carer for the elderly. i went for the interview, had a crb check and they also needed a letter from my doctor.

today i had a phone call to say all is fine and i can start my training on monday :ohmy: its training on mon wed thurs and fri (ill also be going out to work with someone tues evening and sunday morning) the training is office based and will be from 9-4 on the days ive said.

i really want to do this job so much but i just dont know i can. just the thought of being sat in an office for 7 hours fills me with dread and i have such bad panics at times that i just want to run away (and sometimes do) my anxiety is so bad and i even have trouble doing day to day things at times such as taking my 4 children to school.

oh i really dont know what to do. my hubby has been laid off so child care is not the problem its my dreaded anxiety which ive had for 9 years now :weep:

[margaret jones]

Mummy Congratulations on getting such a worthwhile job. The office training will be part of the training that you need and unfourtunatly is needed .Is it the fear of being in the office or what is scaring you ?

[mummy4]

hi its just the not knowing i cant escape nor run away if that makes sense?

[margaret jones]

Mummy hi There will be breaks for drinks and lunch and some of the training will be practical ??? i think My get out card is to have a cough and ask to be excused for a while .Take a bottle water in with you and sip if you feel anxiety rising Breath in and out through your nose a few times . If the anxiety gets to much just go to the loo I hope you can do the office based training as i am sure you will enjoy the work .Best Wishes Margaret LET US KNOW HOW YOU GET ON XXX

[kazzie]

Hi Mummy:D

Ages ago before I was disabled I had the same job:yesyes:

Had the training etc when my panic was at its worst

I was fine and you will get breaks etc

I even found one of the people teaching us had had panic etc too

Please do it.....will be the making of you I promise

Wish I was still a carer but became disabled so now Im an undertaker:whistles:

If Ya cant help them bury them lol

Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:

[mummy4]

Hi

Kaz your reply at the end did make me chuckle!! Im sure I would love the job and I am more than willing to train for the job its just the feeling of being 'stuck' in a room that I cant get out of very easily and it makes me feel panicky just thinking about it!

Margret I have taken your reply on board.....the coughing then leaving the room for a moment thank you.

Oh I really still do not know what to do. It was only last Fri I went to my docs and he suggested upping my meds because I am not coping too well so how the hell can I do a job where I need to care for others though I really want to if that makes sense

[margaret jones]

Hi Mummy

It is difficuly when you feel so scared , but by looking after others maybe just what you need ? Give it a try if it is not for you at least you will have given it a go

Take Care Margaretxxxx

[alihud]

I agree with Margaret,give it a go and see,i tried starting a college course a few weeks ago but i wasnt well enough but at least i tried and will go back to it again when im ready.Regards the home caring,it is a very worthwhile job but i did find it mentally and physically exhausting,if you feel your pushed with all your kids at the moment is it the right time to do it hun?I know from experience overloading yourself with things is not good,just be aware of how much you can deal with and just dont do too much,i think we all run around doing far too much these days and then end up wondering why we r physically and emotionally exhausted.
Ali xxxxx(not doing a heck of alot these days and liking it)

[chickpea]

I know it's easy fpr me to say, as I'm not in your shoes right now,but my advice would be to do it.

You will only know there is nothing to fear if you face it head on.
The only way I have survived the last few months and am getting better is by never allowing anxiety to stop me from doing things, even when I have felt dreadful.

Yes, you will feel awful on the first day for a while...but stick with it and it will pass, I promise. Accept the feelings, don't be scared, try not to run away. Don't fight them, don't fear them - keep telling yourself that you are stronger than you think.

:hugs:

[mummy4]

omg ive still not decided what to do feel really panicky tonight too and quite light headed

[mummy4]

oh im feeling so on edge dizzy and well a drunk feeling even though i do not drink. im feeling awful :(

[mummy4]

well i have failed and did not go. really feeling like rubbish now. had awful nights sleep only had about 4 hours. i did ring them to say i could not go in but i said because of childcare but thats not true as my hubby is here. oh will my life ever get better :(

[everglades]

i really feel for you

i have occ health this morn (again) to see if i can return to work
trouble is my anxiety has increased massively and this meeting is in a different place with a different person

i agree its the horrible fear of not being able to get out, and not knowing the place

i am really sorry you couldnt face it, but try not to beat yourself up, as there will be other opportunities.
perhaps you could arrange for your hub to come with you another time, just for the first visit, until you find your feet.

i do wish you well - and just getting the offer of the job was a huge achievement - and a big step in itself
xx

[marie1974]

hi Mummy, please dont feel bad, u r not a failure, anxiety is a terrible thing and its very hard to b strong and just go for it sometimes, because we face a constant battle, i am the same.

i am doing a course and helping in a school and have so much stress going on and suffering terrible anxiety that i really feel like giving it all up, i try hard to stay strong and carry on, but i will not push myself too far, because i may end up making myself worse, so please dont feel bad, mayb u need to do something but mayb start small and build up as u start to feel more confident, but dont push yourself to far when u suffer bad with anxiety. huge hugs xxx

[mummy4]

thank you so much.

how did the meeting go everglades?? xx

[everglades]

rubbish!
she said no work for forseeable future
and she thinks it has been so long they should terminate my contract as the worry is continuing to make me ill

[mummy4]

oh no im so sorry to hear this. but you should be proud of yourself at least you went!!!

i had phone call this afternoon from another care company i applied for few months back inviting me for interview this wednesday! i asked about training and she said i will have to be trained but it is spaced out over a year!!

[everglades]

thats good
i wish you well

[munkeyinblack]

You had the courgage to apply for the job and even a letter from your doctor did not stop them offering you the job. You clearly have the skills and the ability and just think how good youll feel after youve done it !!

How would you feel about telling them the situation? that way they can support you! IM sure youl be fine just stay in touch and let us knowhow you get on!

Munkey
x

[joolsukuk]

hi congratulations on the job, i kow exatly how you feel, anytime im somewhere where i feel i cant escape! but you know what i do... i say to myself if i need to leave i will, so what! better to go and give it a try then stay in and wonder if you would have been ok....when i first went back to college i was so low, i got talking to another woman (we had both sat right by the door) turns out she has panic/anxiety too!..what im saying is go share your worries with someone there if you can if not just remember you CAN leave if you want to, i bet you wont and wil have a fab day. best of luck, look forward to hearing how it went xxxxxx

[mummy4]

hi just to update you all......

i went for my interview this morning it lasted an hour and supprisingly i did not panic once :yesyes:

felt really good when i came out as i was having doubts about going in the first place.

it will be to start on mon 11th jan and will be 22 hours a week so its a lot more than i expected which i dont know is a good thing or not as i do have 4 daughters!! it will be working 4 eves a week one week and 3 the next plus every other weekend.

the training is spaced out throughout the year which is good thing.

will find out tomorrow if i will be offered the job so fingers crossed xx

[kazzie]

GOOD LUCK:yesyes::yesyes::yesyes::yesyes::yesyes::yesye s:

LUV KAZ X X X:bighug1:

[mummy4]

thanks sweetie xxx

[sue681]

good luck x x x

[munkeyinblack]

Good luck Mummy4. And well done for taking the step!!

Munkey x

[mummy4]

i had a call today offering me the job and i accepted!!!!! its 22 hours a week (not worked that many hours in years due to kids) ill start second week in jan. all i need to do now is 'sort myself out' somehow x