Feeling like a freak

[fishman65]

It was my son's wedding day yesterday.I managed to drive my wife and youngest daughter to the church but sat in the car while the wedding went ahead.I sat and watched the guests arrive,all chatting merrily....the kids excited etc.All the happy people,happy normal people.And then there was me.The oddity,the freak,the cripple....sitting in his car while his son get's married.What a wonderful illness this is isn't it...and then there was the reception and once again I'm isolated by going straight home on my own.

What I normally do in these situations is to get round it by using alcohol.This time I didn't want to risk it as I'm still trying to get my meds stabilised after starting on seroxat about 9 weeks ago.Well next time I'm expected at a social event I'm drinking and to hell with the consequences.Anything is better than that feeling yesterday :weep:

[gypsywomen]

what A SHAME YOU COULDNT GO IN THE CHURCH ,BUT YOU CANT HELP IT I AGREE THIS ILLNESS IS HELL WHOEVER INVENTED IT WANTS SHOOTING LOL SORRY I FEEL FOR YOU BEEN THERE GOT THE TEASHIRT

[JohnBliss]

I know the feeling and have been there countless times -my solution is to have a stiff drink to settle my nerves -for me it's just about managing the way I am -better this for me than not being able to join in and enjoy the social situations
Regards
John

[Maj]

What a shame you couldn't enjoy your son's wedding but you are not a freak!! You are a very sensitive person in an anxiety state and it takes a brave person to deal with this. It's easier to have a drink and get p**** but you chose to forget the drink and carry on with your treatment. You deserve to get better. Don't be too hard on yourself. This illness is just awful and affects peoples lives in many ways. If you have an understanding family then they would know what you were going through yesterday. Hope your meds work for you and you turn a corner soon.
Myra:hugs:

[JohnBliss]

No way I would get p----d this is certainly no answer to anything but one
drink for me just takes the edge off my nerves and enables me then to enjoy the occasion. I should add that I'm not on medication
Regards
John

[fishman65]

Thank you guys for your wonderful,supportive replies.I think I just had to get this out of my system.As you all know,its awful how this illness separates us,and yesterday has just got me so fed up with everything.I do indeed have an understanding family,but sometimes I just want to be normal?But then so do all of you guys.At least I know I'm not alone when I come on here,so thank you for making me feel just that bit better

Hugs, Fishy

[marie1974]

Hiya, i just to let you know, i understand how u feel, i am the same and my brother is getting married next year and will b a big event, lots of people and i cant go, i just cant. i am not close to my family anyway but have terrible panic and anxiety and if i went i would need a good drink and if i did that, i would prob ruin the wedding so i not going. dont feel bad is all i will say, u got to do wot feels right for you. hugs xx

[maxine]

It;s taking me a day to reply to this topic.... I would normally get p%ssed to deal with this.. I'm on day 5 of Seroxat and felling like death and to be comepletely honest 've beeen getting drunk most nights just to feel normal so I admire your courage and self disipline , you are doing so well.

I know you must be feeling like crap to miss your sons wedding but he knows what you are dealing with and that is the main thing.

I admire your courage and bravery so much.

:hugs:

Maxine

[looking4answers]

Sorry you are feeling bad and here is hoping you get to feeling better real soon..Michael

[summersmum]

honestly i dont think he minded.. he understood..