Google Is Not My Friend

[lamentinglaura]

I've been googling symptoms again and have myself near hysteria. Why can't I stop doing this to myself? I know that googling will only upset me yet I feel compelled to search out reasons for the things I'm experiencing. This fear is horrible. I spend every waking moment filled with horrible thoughts. Sometimes I think I should go to the ER but then I realize that I'll probably wait for hours to see a doctor and then I'll be sent home without anything being done. Our local hospital isn't the greatest. It's driving me nuts to know that I'll have to wait forever to get tests done. I wish I could go to bed and sleep for a few hours but I'm wide awake and my nerves are too bad to relax. I wish I could go see my family doctor. She's as dumb as a stump (in my opinion) but at least I could tell her all my fears. This is terrible.

[Gazman]

don't be too hard on yourself! It's human nature to want to know and find a reason for your suffering / symptoms.

And google is a friend to nobody, it's difficult and i've been there, especially researching neurological symptoms / diseases, auto immune diseases etc, but you MUST stop. Where does it get you? You have no idea if you have this or that symptom as most symptom lists for diseases on the net are taken out of context, all you end up doing is reinforcing your fears.

You clearly know what your doing is wrong, you need to have stronger will power not to google.

I know from reading your previous thread that your certain something neurological is going on, but that might not be true and even if it is neurological, it doesn't mean it's the serious neuro diseases, so many people get neuro symptoms and they jump straight to ALS or MS (me included) as google throws up the worst case scenarios but 95% of the time it turns out to be something far less serious.

Try to hang in there and if i were you i would go see your doc as soon as you can to get things sorted.

All the best - Gaz

[KK77]

I know how you feel. I was feeling so bad once I decided to go to hospital A&E. I waited 4 hours to be seen by a doctor and I was all over the place. The doctor was beyond useless and said there was nothing he could do. He said that I was well enough to walk into hospital so nothing was seriously wrong... I got up and kicked the chair over and said "Oh I feel better now". Funny thing was ... I DID feel better for venting my anger.

There comes a point where you say enough is enough. I still get weird symptoms but I don't take any notice. I've kind of written it off. I won't let it control my life anymore I suppose.

[lamentinglaura]

Thanks Gaz. I don't think I can go to my doctor because I've been there every week for an eternity. We did complete blood work twice and all was fine. We tested stool specimens because I was having diarrhea out of the blue, even through the night. Everything turned out fine with that. I'm due for complete blood work again next month so I'm not supposed to see her until then. She already sent me to an Orthopedist who I have to see again next month. My next step is to ask her to refer me to a neurologist. She'll flip if I show up in her office again. I'll just have to suffer this out. The first thing I'm going to do is delete my bookmarks for symptoms sites. I have to get rid of this google addiction.

[lamentinglaura]

That's what would happen if I went to the hospital, Melancholia. I'd just be blown off. What I find hard is that I notice every little twinge in my body now. I don't know what's from anxiety and what's from something else. I think I'm really losing it.

[Gazman]

i'm the same, i'm at the neuro on wednesday, i notice everything, from internal vibrations to twitches all over my body, i've had problems with swallowing, burning, cold hands and feet, losing 2 stone,having diarea, right hand feels stiff and clumsy, feeling like i can't talk properly, blurry vision... you get the point hehe.

I too have had loads of blood tests, stool and urine samples and also ECGS, CT scans, endoscopy, several trips to A&E numerous trips to the doctors, several physicals, seen several different doctors too... all come up with the same conclusion.... anxiety / somatization disorder.

But i've been sent to the neuro now for peace of mind :winks:

Your not alone and your not losing it :D

[lamentinglaura]

I feel better, Gaz, thanks so much. I'm experiencing the same things as you ... trouble swallowing, weird nerve twinges all over, etc... Now I'm worried that I'm not breathing right, can't seem to take a deep breath, my eyelids are twitching, I'm not sure if I'm walking right, feel like I'm about to topple over, my toes are getting cramps, I find it hard to talk at times, my speech is wonky, I wake up through the night with weird pains all over, oh frig the list goes on and on lol. This afternoon I have an appointment with an eye doctor, I need to complain about my blurry vision (I wear glasses anyway). What I need is to be put in the hospital and have a scan on every part of my body ... though if everything turned out fine I'd be back in 6 months freaking out again. lol