lotus
20-11-05, 16:45
Well, now I'm thinking that I might have OCD as well as panic, anxiety and depression. [Duh!]
- I pick my skin, I bite my lips, I run my fingers through my hair, I scratch different places of my body, I over-blink, all of these happen especially when I'm nervous ... sometimes I do these things automatically without even thinking about them.
- I have a lot of weird, obesessive and unwanted thoughts, I worry that I may hurt myself or somebody I love, that I may become a killer, that I may become a psychopath, that I may curse somebody on the street, that I may start shouting, that I may go mad and do something crazy and horrible. Sometimes I think that I actually hate the ones I love and want them to die, which makes me feel like a very bad person, generally it takes me a lot of time to convince myself that I'm not a bad person. I'm also a perfectionist. For example, when I have to send an e-mail, I check the content and the recepient address many times because I want to be sure they're correct. Writing a paper for school used to take a lot of time because I wanted it to be perfect, I couldn't continue with the next sentence until the last one was perfect. As a kid I was always afraid that I could get AIDS or some other horrible desease, so I used to go through the events of the day repetitivelyin my mind, in order to convince myself that nothing that could cause me to become sick happened. I tend to dwell a lot when I start thinking about something, even when that's not needed, I think about a certain thing until I make sure that I have thought about it thoroughly and completely and have not missed any part of it. [Duh!]
- I don't like cleaning LOL ... recently I started thinking that maybe this is avoidance behaviour, because when I start cleaning/washing/doing any housework, it takes me so much time to complete it. I either overclean, or not clean at all.
- When I have even a little physical problem, I'm convinced that I will get very seriously sick and die. When I read about a physical ot psychological problem on the internet /and I do read a lot LOL/ I'm convinced that I have all of its symptoms.
I don't have a specific OCD issue that bothers me /such as keeping things in perfect order for example/, the things that cause me distress seem to change like every week. One week I'm worrying about becoming a killer, then the next week I read about a certain personality disorder and I'm convinced that I have it, then the next week I start obsessing that maybe I could've been sexually abused as a kid and not being able to remember it ... and millions of other things.
So are these obsessive tendencies due to anxiety, or do I have OCD?[8)]
- I pick my skin, I bite my lips, I run my fingers through my hair, I scratch different places of my body, I over-blink, all of these happen especially when I'm nervous ... sometimes I do these things automatically without even thinking about them.
- I have a lot of weird, obesessive and unwanted thoughts, I worry that I may hurt myself or somebody I love, that I may become a killer, that I may become a psychopath, that I may curse somebody on the street, that I may start shouting, that I may go mad and do something crazy and horrible. Sometimes I think that I actually hate the ones I love and want them to die, which makes me feel like a very bad person, generally it takes me a lot of time to convince myself that I'm not a bad person. I'm also a perfectionist. For example, when I have to send an e-mail, I check the content and the recepient address many times because I want to be sure they're correct. Writing a paper for school used to take a lot of time because I wanted it to be perfect, I couldn't continue with the next sentence until the last one was perfect. As a kid I was always afraid that I could get AIDS or some other horrible desease, so I used to go through the events of the day repetitivelyin my mind, in order to convince myself that nothing that could cause me to become sick happened. I tend to dwell a lot when I start thinking about something, even when that's not needed, I think about a certain thing until I make sure that I have thought about it thoroughly and completely and have not missed any part of it. [Duh!]
- I don't like cleaning LOL ... recently I started thinking that maybe this is avoidance behaviour, because when I start cleaning/washing/doing any housework, it takes me so much time to complete it. I either overclean, or not clean at all.
- When I have even a little physical problem, I'm convinced that I will get very seriously sick and die. When I read about a physical ot psychological problem on the internet /and I do read a lot LOL/ I'm convinced that I have all of its symptoms.
I don't have a specific OCD issue that bothers me /such as keeping things in perfect order for example/, the things that cause me distress seem to change like every week. One week I'm worrying about becoming a killer, then the next week I read about a certain personality disorder and I'm convinced that I have it, then the next week I start obsessing that maybe I could've been sexually abused as a kid and not being able to remember it ... and millions of other things.
So are these obsessive tendencies due to anxiety, or do I have OCD?[8)]