back in the shell

[HelenS70]

Hi, I have decided to go back in my shell where it is safe, where nobody can hurt me and I can't hurt anybody by speaking my mind, making a joke or just plainly saying the wrong thing. At this moment I feel numbness, I feel like crying but there aren't any tears so I get this empty feeling instead and a sadness that nobody will like me anyway and I might as well not live. I am sorry for saying the latter but it's true, I don't feel I fit in anywhere. I do have a wonderful family but I feel such a burden on them... I tried and I failed. :weep:

I do wish to thank everybody who has been so nice to me but I don't deserve it.

Love,

Helen

[Maj]

Hi Helen,

I noticed in a previous post you said your moods go up and down so treat this as a down mood which will lift. You'll get through this blip. I honestly wouldn't worry about speaking your mind, making a joke, etc. - that's life and we all do it - it makes us who we are. If your mood doesn't lift then speak to your doctor and get your meds reviewed, but I think it's probably stress because of the time of year. Christmas can be stressful for people - it's not all turkey and tinsel. I hope you start to feel better again. Keep in touch on here and people will see you through this blip.
Myra:hugs:

[crissy]

Hi so sorry to think your hiding in your shell, please try and have a peep out and know you are never on your own, I have just joined and find it reasurring so many others, last night I tried to write some poetry to change my frame of mind doing anything different takes the egde off, we all deserve hope just a tiny spark will come and rekindle your spirits. may knowing that we care help
love crissy

[Brianthesnail]

hi i only want you are going thought, the people around you love and care for you. that mean that you must go on. if you are lukly . thing will get beter soon for you.
just take care. brian

[HelenS70]

Thank you all for your kind replies...you are right it is my moods going up and down... I wish I could stop myself from writing these messages, is it a cry for attention? Am I really needy? I used to be so full of confidence years ago I could take on the world but now I am just a mess. I do love this forum, I have found people with the same problems I face, we are in this together and from now on I am going to embrace this gift given to me.

One thing what I hate though is having to wear this mask all the time, just today a neighbour said: "you are such a pretty and talented young woman, you should be out there looking for your soulmate, he is out there"! I just can't see it and I beat myself up, hating myself. I then return to my shell, rock back and forth hoping will change within me. I find it difficult to get close to people, the trust is gone my faith has disappeared... Feeling very low and then on a high it is wearing me out!

Sorry if this message doesn't make sense...

[Anxious_gal]

you deserve a little bit of attention! that's why this forum is here it's for support. it's the one place i can come and moan and wine , ask for advice and yet people are always understanding and supportive!
aw my neighbour said to me I was pretty i should have a few boyfriend, and it made me think whats wrong with me why dont i have a boyfriend!
so watching you negative thinking can help.
i like Louise Hay I really like her wisdom cards there have happy positive thing wrote on them and you say them out loud.
maybe try your doctor or concilling? you deserve to be happy.