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mick_uk
11-01-10, 00:30
Unsophisticated 98 year old man with interchangeable toupees and
highly unpredictable obnoxious flatulence, seeks older woman who would love to share my passion for naked bungee jumping and Polynesian nose flute playing.

Anyone?

Going home
11-01-10, 00:47
First time ive laughed out loud in a while...no offense to you :D but very nice to meet you mick.

GH xx

Ronny
11-01-10, 03:11
You made me laugh he!he! i am looking for a sugar daddy.......but i think you may have trouble pushing my wheelchair he!he! :D

weeble40
11-01-10, 03:46
Mick lol ya mad head, good to see ya xxxxxxxxxx

Veronica H
11-01-10, 11:12
:roflmao::bighug1:you have high expectations from this older woman Mick.

Veronica

Ronny
12-01-10, 00:46
Hi again Mick,.......was thinking if you have not found someone yet i am willing and able.It is so hot over here i would'nt mind a trip over there it would be so nice to snuggle under a doona,I hope you can keep up with me he!he!................have a good day:D:hugs:

hoppipolla
25-01-10, 01:44
If only I were a woman! :D

Ronny
25-01-10, 05:31
Have you found any takers yet Mick?:D

mick_uk
25-01-10, 11:11
No takers yet Ronny :weep:
I've had a couple of suggestions but one was physically impossible and the other is illegal in most countries :scared15:
Your wheelchair wouldn't be a problem Ronny, I have a motorized Zimmer frame. We could whizz through the shopping centers in no time.
I do play the drums at two in the morning. Would that be a problem?

I have a spare nose flute Bev :winks:

Mick (at the moment searching for his false teeth in the aquarium)

bottleblond
25-01-10, 15:26
No takers yet Ronny :weep:
I've had a couple of suggestions but one was physically impossible and the other is illegal in most countries :scared15:
Your wheelchair wouldn't be a problem Ronny, I have a motorized Zimmer frame. We could whizz through the shopping centers in no time.
I do play the drums at two in the morning. Would that be a problem?

I have a spare nose flute Bev :winks:

Mick (at the moment searching for his false teeth in the aquarium)


LMAO MICK :hugs:
Where you been mate? you ok?
Awwww i fair missed your humour about the place!
So glad to see you here
Lisa
xxxx
:hugs:

mick_uk
25-01-10, 17:35
Hiya Lisa,
I'm doing really good thnx, hope you're doing well blondie.
Just touting here for a girlfriend :D
Minmum requirements: a pulse :wacko:
Take care

Mick

xx

bottleblond
25-01-10, 17:58
Lmfao i'm quite sure you don't need to tout for a girlfriend mate, you'll have them falling at your feet with that hunour! :yesyes:

Ronny
25-01-10, 22:30
Howdy there Mick,he!he!
I play the bongo,s in the nude around mid night with my Bob Marley wig on,and a hooker ( smking Pipe).You are lucky you have choppers I ain,t got none all false like my boobs lol.I will see you over there as soon as I can,may i bring my dog?I must tell you I can still walk a touch,so watch out.......................Lovey dovey Ronny xx:D

eeyorelover
25-01-10, 22:58
I spit my tea across the room!
It's not hooker....it's hookah!
The later wouldn't get you put in the clink (well I guess it could depending on what you have in it!) but if you were playing bongos, naked with a hooker now THAT might get a charge put on ya!
LOL

Louise21
25-01-10, 23:03
Lol!
Thanks for that, Mick!
x

mick_uk
26-01-10, 08:43
I had visions of seeing Ronny sitting naked, no teeth, false boobs, playing the bongos dressed as Bob Marley with smoke rings coming out of a hooker sitting in the corner :wacko:
Even on Prozac I never saw that !

Jaco45er
26-01-10, 08:51
lol Mick, you always give me a chuckle bud, I hope you are well fella :)

Buttons81
26-01-10, 10:36
This thread really made me smile, thank you Mick x

bottleblond
26-01-10, 15:10
To all condenders...It would also help if you had hairy feet.
Mick has a foot fettish ya see :winks:

Look Mick, i even painted me nails for you this time....

http://www.alleycatscratch.com/lotr/makingem/Makeup/Feet/FeetComp/Texas_close.jpg


Boooooootiful :winks:
PMSL
xxx

diane07
26-01-10, 15:16
Nice feet lisa:winks:

SueBee
26-01-10, 15:42
I'm in the running, you sound like a catch Mick...... I'll even let you chew my toenails :roflmao:

http://img.jokaroo.com/images/foot.jpg

mick_uk
26-01-10, 16:54
Oh they are so gross. :roflmao:
But then again ..........

Louise21
26-01-10, 17:03
Lol!

bottleblond
26-01-10, 17:10
mick, you will have to find a more pleasant fettish! :noangel:

mick_uk
26-01-10, 17:46
If I had a fetish it wouldn't be feet, especially those feet :roflmao:

bottleblond
26-01-10, 18:05
For anyone who hasn't seen Mick yet...here he is in all his glory....

http://www.commentbuddy.com/comments/Funny-People/seekcodes_938_29568.jpg


Doesn't he look great!?
:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:

Louise21
26-01-10, 18:06
Never say never!

mick_uk
26-01-10, 18:15
Lisa :roflmao:
That was when I was 18.....you should see me now, I've really let myself go :wacko:

bottleblond
26-01-10, 18:38
:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
Pmsl you crack me up!!!
xxx

Ronny
26-01-10, 22:57
It must be all that smoke,lol for my bad spelling after all I am old. Give me a break I am doing a computer course for dummies.Then watch out! I will see you soon Mick,do u still want me??even if I can't spell?:bighug1:
Love Ronny xxx

flapjack
27-01-10, 03:16
98 year old unsophisticated man, interchangable toupees ..... dad ? is that you ?????

Flapjack

mick_uk
27-01-10, 09:12
Flapjack, shhhhhhhhhhhh :whistles:

Ronny, ofcourse I do, yoo can borow my spelchekka.


PS: To all the other guys out there. A word of warning if you are taking Viagra! I tried one for the first time last night, got the tablet stuck in my throat, and had a stiff neck all night! So be warned.



Mick (Doing Tai Chi naked in the back garden)

diane07
27-01-10, 09:16
:roflmao:That made me laugh!

sb001f8994
27-01-10, 10:31
Hee, hee, just what we need on a miserable January morning, a laugh from mick! Hope you keeping well mick, take care xx

Ronny
27-01-10, 21:59
gee,Mick I am in lust.me and u we are a team.
(need new batteries for my kick starter)
your true Love Ronny xxx:D

mick_uk
28-01-10, 14:30
Hiya jaco and carol, I'm doing good thanks, I hope you're both well too.

Ronny :wub:

sb001f8994
28-01-10, 15:15
Hi Mick,
Im doing really well, getting out a bit, well as far as somerfield so we eat now!!!
Take care, lovely to see you here again.
Carol x

bottleblond
28-01-10, 19:46
I know Bev...i am gutted :weep: and after me growing me foot hair espacially too. Ah well i will just have to try to shift me beer belly and builders bum and try to find myself a new hot man!! :noangel:

Ronny
29-01-10, 06:17
Oh girls don't be jealous,we can all have our way with Mick.Viagra, he will keep us all content xxx
off to trim my nose hairs he!he!

mick_uk
29-01-10, 09:21
Girls, believe me, a night of passion with me will be the best thirty seconds you're ever had. :wacko:

sunshine-lady
29-01-10, 15:15
LMAO:roflmao:

found some tips for you mik lol!

Lovemaking Tips for Seniors



1. Sexy Seniors ... please wear your glasses to make sure your partner is really in the bed.

2. While attempting Seniors Lovemaking, set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Twilight Lovemaking ... set the mood with lighting ... turn the lights OFF!

4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.

6. Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.

7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.

8. Make all the noise you want ... the neighbors are deaf too ... oh MY!

9. Woo hoo ... if it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

10. Don't even think about trying it twice.

sunshine-lady
29-01-10, 15:21
I know there is a lot of competition for you Mick, but just thought I would show you my new pants... do I stand a chance? :winks:

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_i7Rd97SlZAc/Sry3T0Cs7CI/AAAAAAAAASo/jsM9e6EePTg/s400/granny+panties+2.jpg

mick_uk
29-01-10, 15:24
Oh sunshine :cloud9:

:bighug1:

sunshine-lady
29-01-10, 16:37
I am ready lol :roflmao:

http://angelstarcreations.com/special/uglyfrog_files/old_lady.gif

bottleblond
29-01-10, 16:54
LMAO:roflmao:

found some tips for you mik lol!

Lovemaking Tips for Seniors



1. Sexy Seniors ... please wear your glasses to make sure your partner is really in the bed.

2. While attempting Seniors Lovemaking, set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Twilight Lovemaking ... set the mood with lighting ... turn the lights OFF!

4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.

6. Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.

7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.

8. Make all the noise you want ... the neighbors are deaf too ... oh MY!

9. Woo hoo ... if it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

10. Don't even think about trying it twice.


OMG that's hilarious pmsl :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao: xxxx

bottleblond
29-01-10, 17:07
Mick...pack your polygrip ultra and Bic razor, i am coming to get you....

http://www.webteufel.com/cards/oma.jpg


sorry ladies but if you're not fast, you're last!!
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

xxxxx

mick_uk
29-01-10, 17:27
All this temptation :sofa:

mick_uk
29-01-10, 17:40
Me and my brother on my 15th birthday. We are both single, if anyone is interested


http://correctopinion.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/1280-inbred-brothers.jpg

bottleblond
29-01-10, 17:51
Pmsl we could go on a double date! :winks:

suzy-sue
29-01-10, 18:47
:roflmao:Didnt know you were in movies Mick .."THE HILLS HAVE EYES " springs to mind .:roflmao:Good to see you still have your unique sense of humour ..T/C luv Sue xx

Ronny
29-01-10, 21:04
Oh Ladies,how can i compete with you all,My Mick I don,t think I stand a chance..................Ronny crying boo hoo.

mick_uk
29-01-10, 21:09
I get the feeling you ladies are not taking this seriously :lac:

sunshine-lady
30-01-10, 01:35
which one is you in the photo mick?? I hope yu are the oe on the right as he is well fit xx

mick_uk
30-01-10, 08:54
Yep that's me on the right sunshine. You can tell I was the only one blessed with the looks.
I'm often mistaken for Brad Pitt. The other day I was taking the goat for a walk when this young girl called out "you're the pits"
Where would I be without my looks and charisma. :doh:

stace81
30-01-10, 12:05
OMG im really laughing Mick i love your humour xx

sunshine-lady
30-01-10, 21:07
Is this your goat Mick? :roflmao:

http://rationalwiki.com/wiki/images/thumb/9/98/MarriedGoat.jpeg/150px-MarriedGoat.jpeg

Ronny
30-01-10, 21:19
Mick, You and your Bro,were you both in the movie Deliverance.I keep hearing duelling banjo's And worried about my pet pig Peggy.:D

mick_uk
31-01-10, 09:51
Sunshine, that's a mighty pretty goat you have there :D
I keep my goat in the house with me. My brother said "What about the smell?"
I said, "The goats got used to it now "


Ronny,I do have a banjo :wacko:



Mick