cant cope

[Lozzie]

Hi all, can i just say im so pleased that the site is up and running again, i have missed it so much!!
At the moment I feel like iv gone 1 step forward and 5 steps back:(
For those of you who dont know me i suffer from anxiety,panic attacks and agrophobia.
I managed to go out 1 weekend a few weeks ago now and didnt have 1 single panic attack, i was so pleased with myself but now........

Im back where I started.
I haven't finished my christmas shopping and still have loads of stuff to get, i tried going out earlier but ended up feeling sick with worry and came back home.
My partner is going out with his friends in few days for his works do, this has made me very anxious as I'm really worried he is going to meet another girl and end up dumping me for her. I know you might think I sound crazy but I genuinely feel that he will meet a nice girl and realise that im holding him back, we dont go out much bcos of my anxiety and even wen we do its either not for very long or I end up having panic attacks and feel like iv ruined it all.
I'm scared even as im writing this that he maybe thinking bout leaving me, he could be with someone "normal" who is able to go out any place any time without all this worry.
I dont know what to do
xlaurax

[trac67]

Hi Laura,

Try not to let the christmas rush get you down, christmas is an anxious time for everyone, so just do it all at your own pace.

Remember your boyfriend is with you because he loves YOU, and everything about you, just because you suffer with anxiety, panics etc, doesnt make it any different, remember how pleased he was for you that you went out the other weekend, I remember you telling me he couldnt stop talking about it, so that goes to show how proud he is of you. Just remember he may be going out, but it is you he will be going home to at the end of the evening.

Take care
Trac XXX

'Live your life with arms wide open, today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten'

[alexis]

Hi Laura, I feel pretty much the same today, but we havent gone back , we are treading water and that is OK.
I havent done any shopping for my close family and I tried today but returned home virtually empty handed, the crowds were horrendous, the more I think about it the more anxious I get, thus sending my mind into overdrive about everything else which is happening at the moment, which is what I think you are doing too.
You are "normal" you just have anxiety etc too.
Take care.

love from Alexisxx

If I help one person today it was worth getting up.

[Pennie]

Hi Laura,

Those Christmas crowds are horrible. I don't think anyone likes them, anxiety or not. I worry about my husband getting fed up of me the way I am and feel I'm letting him down, but I know he loves me really and wants to help me get better. Trac's right, your boyfriend loves you for you and is proud of you too.

Take care

Pennie

Fear is static that prevents me from hearing myself. ~Samuel Butler

[Lozzie]

Hi all xx thanks for the replies xx its nice to have some support on here. Well I managed to go out and do some christmas shopping, it was bedlam but i managed it:D
I still panicked but i managed to try and distract myself from the horrible feelings and thoughts that were going through my head.
laurax

[Yvonne]

Hi All
Laura, if your man was going to dump you he probably would have by now. He probably worries that he can't help you more.

My husband gets fed up with it all. He handles me with kyd gloves most of the time. He loves me for me (so does your man) and my husband remembers what I used to be like and he never ever gives up hope that I will soon be back to my old normal self. Actually, I know I will one day - and so will you.

I think those of you who even ventured to go into a busy town are wonderful. There is no way I would go on my own at the moment into crowded shops. I am just going to the local small stores where the queues are bearable. So you should all congratulate yourselves for trying.

Love to all
Yvonne

Y Goble

[Meg]

Laura

*i managed to try and distract myself from the horrible feelings and thoughts that were going through my head.*

Well done for going out and getting the necessarys done. That was a big achievement in being able to control what went through your head .. remember this next time too.



Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

[Lozzie]

Thankyou every1 for ur comments xx its nice to think you have all taken the time out to read my thread xx
Well today has been a better day. It didnt start too well, i woke up with a headache and it all went abit downhill from there. why is it that when we plan things they never go the way we plan them??
Anyway eventually I braved Bluewater (shopping centre) to do rest of my christmas shopping and I didnt have a panic attack, was little anxious but the distraction thing worked!!
And I am going again to Bluewater to prove to myself that I can do this (3 trips to shopping centre in 1 week is HUGE progress) especially as it is very busy time of year.
I still have grocery shopping to do yet and that will be another challenge.

But im going to take a deep breath and get on with it, otherwise I will never do it.

And also im going to start the new year on a positive note.

Hope every1 is ok xx
And every1 has a very MERRY christmas xx
Laurax

[suz163]

hi laura,

I hope you don't mind but i have added you to my msn messenger as i know exactly what you are going through as i am going through the same. If you want to chat, I'm here!

Best wishes,

Suzy

[Meg]

Good for you Laura for going to Bluewater !!

Good step forwards



Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

[Karen]

Well done Laura.

Bluewater at this time of year would be a challenge for anyone. You're doing really well.

Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

[feege]

Hi laura

How fantastic to manage 3 trips in one week! I hope next year I will get to make some progress although for me that seems a long way away! It is fantastic that you pushed yourself to do it again and again - that is the way forward to health and confidence!

We are all rooting for you and you are inspiring us along the way!

When one of us progresses it helps us all I think xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

fee
xx

[Lozzie]

thanks for all ur kind words and support xx
im glad to think i may be helping people and inspiring them by what im telling you all xx if anyone is experiencing similar problems or relate to anything i have said please feel free to get in contact with me xx i will gladly offer my support and advice where needed xx
and i hope everyone on here has a very merry christmas and a happy new year, i will keep coming on here during the christmas period to check if every1 is ok xx
xlaurax