Being Alone

[littlemissshy]

Hi, Hope you can help.
My parents are now both in their 70's and my dad has health problems I'm really close to both my parents and i see them nearly every day. I have SA and i only have one close friend who lives in another part of the country so i see her about three times a year,so it just hit me the other day that once my parents are gone i'll have no one apart from one friend to turn to for advice and help.
I know i rely on my parents too much and that i should be with people my own age but i'm now in my late thirties and my SA is just the same,i live alone and if i don't see my parents i basically don't go out. I'm now really scared that it won't be long before i'm really on my own, normally i love being alone but i always know that my parents are there to visit.
I just can't see how i'm going to cope really alone.
Any advice please?

[lollypop!]

oh dear... I can see where you are coming from here. Are you an only child? I am. I think the only way out of this is overcoming SA to some degree that you can make some new friends. I know this may seem impossible right now but I do understand because I have always had to fight that tendency myself. It is not easy but you CAN do it. A bit at a time. Just make a little goal each day that extends you a bit. Now is the time to prepare for the future.

[littlemissshy]

oh dear... I can see where you are coming from here. Are you an only child? I am. I think the only way out of this is overcoming SA to some degree that you can make some new friends. I know this may seem impossible right now but I do understand because I have always had to fight that tendency myself. It is not easy but you CAN do it. A bit at a time. Just make a little goal each day that extends you a bit. Now is the time to prepare for the future.

Yes you're right i am an only child and i do need to make myself get out there but i hope to take your advice and try a little at a time. It's really hard,but thank you for your help:)

[leony]

is there a leisure centre near u if so perhaps u could try something like yoga try and find a class with few people in it on a quiet morning no kids around and just a few mums going or an art class if there is 1

[littlemissshy]

is there a leisure centre near u if so perhaps u could try something like yoga try and find a class with few people in it on a quiet morning no kids around and just a few mums going or an art class if there is 1

Yes I actually saw a dance class I would like to try but chickened out at the last minute. I'm hoping I get up the nerve somehow to join the class even though it's already started.:blush:

[PUGLETMUM]

:)hi, im not an only child but i have had lots of trouble with my 2 sisters over the years, so i cant readily call on one of them and the one that i am currently getting on well with live in the south while i live in the north, so i am feeling very isolated too- and i have an only child. i had suffered from agoraphobia (briefly), health anxiety and social phobia before my mum got sick and died by the time i was 20 - im not saying this to scare you - but you are right, your mum and dad arent going to be alive for ever, but you can use this knowledge positively. i really really feel for you, because i feel like im the person this actually happened to and i know how hard it is when you depend on somebody or other ppl so much - but please do something about it now, even if thats just making friends on here first - its a start,and ppl who understand are prob easier to deal with at first -also you may come to see that others dont actually notice how you are feeling. do you work?, emma :)

[magpie girl]

hi you have already made the first step by joining this forum:):)Try going to one of the meet ups of the NMPmembers in your area,that way you are around people who suffer and feel the same way you do.Set yourself goals but realistic ones that you know with a little determanation you can achieve.:hugs:Join the chatroom on here and make friends and find out who lives near you,maybe you could all meet for coffee.xxxx