Keeping my mind off it.

[Redrainbow]

Well, i'm writing this post to keep my mind of things because the minute my mind starts wandering that's it, awful thoughts time again, I'm already feeling bad again. I had two not so bad days though so i was expecting this sort of day soon. Not so bad this morning, but this afternoon i'm fighting the thoughts again, and already feeling down. I'm not sure my meds are working so well, if they were i would not be like this now. They say it takes time to find the right meds for the person, but just how long will it take.

A couple of my new freinds on here have adviced me to go on facebook. Strange really because i'm so afraid of being around or near people and yet on the other hand i would love to have friends to talk to face to face. How do you win .
Oh well suppose i had better go and pick the kids up from school in a minute.:scared15:

[BexieB]

Hi Rainbow

I don't have social anxiety, but i too am not particularly comfortable with people i don't know. I'm sure you would be comfortable in the company of people you know and trust. I'm thinking of joining a depression support group and am comforted by the fact that everyone there is in the same boat. there can be no judgement in a setting like that.

Sorry to hear the meds aren't the best, i'm struuggling with my own at the moment. Mind you i've just taken two solapdenes and i'm flying. What are you on? Might have to change mine, 3 months on seroxat and still very up and down.

Wishing you the best of everything
Love and Hugs
Bexie

[Redrainbow]

Well was on citalopram, now on mitzapine 30mg and sleeping pills, The only thing i'm really sure of is i don't want to be like this much longer. This site and the nice people on it is really my only contact with the outside world.
Silly and pathetic really, as i'm a grown man of 37.

[claire m]

hi i think when you are alone the mind wonders and its like a vicious circle really.
try to find something to occupy the mind is a good start.
you are not silly and pathetic you are poorly .
sometimes the medication can take a while to work how long have you been on it?

[Redrainbow]

Been on my meds about 3 months now. The severe depression has kicked in well tonight, progressed from this afternoon really. I was not so bad when i woke up today, though didn't sleep to well last night, bad, bad nightmares. I don't think there can be to much mistake that this depression and anxiety really can be living hell. Maybe it's because it's the first time i have had it.
Had a couple of suicidal thoughts this afternoon, not to strong but they were there all the same, i think it's just my mind looking for a way out off the torture it's going through at the minute. I suppose the only hope you have is that tomorrow may be better, quickly replaced by the thought it may not be.

[claire m]

hey mate, dont think about tomorrow. just think about today:hugs:.

[Redrainbow]

I know what your saying, but i just don't want anymore days like today, i'm really not sure just how much more i can take. As i have said before this is like being on a rollercoaster that does not have many highs, only lows!
The day just went downhill from this afternoon onwards, god roll on bedtime!

[claire m]

thats what i think too. im going to have a bath and early night

[Redrainbow]

Yes i suppose there is something funny about the way we feel,
You know, Question, Oh what did you like best about today?
Oooohhh Let me think, Bedtime! That sums this depression up really doesn't it!