building up self esteem & confidence - what helped you?

[mummygarcia]

my councillor has given me "homework" to start working on my self esteem and confidence .. easier said than done
we have discovered that i have a deep fear of failure, and because of this i tend to just plod along, stagnating almost .. ive given up too soon, too easily, not even been willing to take the challenge (coz of stuff that happened as a child, no doubt) then i end up feeling a failure anyway and really beating myself up about it - id never really thought about it before but i actually dont like myself very much, although i know im a good person (i am mixed up arent i, lol) and i certainly dont like my own company
in the last year, i have lost several friends and relatives who really made me feel valued and loved and so i guess in their company i felt kind of ok, without them around to buoy me up i guess im feeling really down about things and about myself
anyway, just wondered if there were any books out there that have helped with your self confidence, or anything that you tried that really gave a boost to your confidence or self esteem
im quite creative, so im thinking about trying a jewellery making workshop, not sure if this is the sort of thing she had in mind

[Maj]

Hello,

Please don't say you don't like yourself. I'm sure you are a really nice caring, sensitive person. What's not to like? Yes, it seems all about building up your self-esteem. I think just doing things for yourself will help you with this. Sometimes we are so busy helping others and making their lives easier that we forget about ourselves. Do the things you like doing and treat yourself now and again. Just being good to yourself will bring it's own benefits. I too suffer from low self esteem sometimes but I can't say I don't like myself. We are what we are. If you want to do that jewellery workshop then go ahead and enjoy it. Do something for you and start liking yourself. You deserve it. I'm sure there are hundreds of books out there but I'd just sit and write down all the good points you have and I'm sure you'll surprise yourself.
Myra:hugs:

[chickpea]

You sound a lot like me - it's tough at times, isn't it?
Paul McKenna's Confidence book and CD are good - they really changed the way I felt about myself.
Anything that makes you value yourself is good - so make sure you treat yourself every single day. It can be a small thing - a magazine over a coffee, or a large thing like new clothes, a holiday, beauty treatments etc. You need to believe you're worth it and deserve it.:D

The jewellry making course sounds like a perfect idea - an instant treat that you'll enjoy and get something out of - a new skill.
Do it!:hugs: