what am i????

[mummy4]

I really hate labels but I think if I knew exactly what 'I' was then it would help me be able to move on a little more if that makes sense?!

Right here goes........

I have suffered from anxiety since I was 17 (am now almost 27).

I have had good days and very very bad days.

Currently I am almost 'scared' to go into a supermarket and 90% of the time I will order my shopping on line. I avoid actually going into a shop even a newsagents. The school run is another major problem for me. I hate it with a passion and I don't mean in a chore sense I mean because I do not walk to stop or talk to anyone and sometimes I don't even take them or pick them up, my husband does.
Family parties are another thing I hate. I have a party to go to this Sat and I am dreading it already.

When I am 'forced' (by myself) to go into these situations I get a very scared and nervous feeling and the thing I get most which frightens the hell out of me is dizziness and almost like a drunk kind of feeling. Really does scare me and then of course I worry more.

I have been on and off anti ds, currently on cipralex 5mg (supposed to be a day but I take them every other night) and have been on these constant for 4 years. I have tried CBT and have read so many books.

Really am sick of this now. I just want to live life as a 'normal' person :weep:

Please someone help/advise me xx

[Idstain]

Hi :)

If you are serious about recovery then I highly recommend meditation. I have no doubt in my mind that it is (outside of physiological problems like a thyroid issue) a 100% cure of anxiety. I made a thread on it a few days ago in this section showing the results behind it all. It takes time and persistance but it is so beneficial I can barely put it in to words.

There are alot of ways to describe it but essentially you come to realise that there's a 'you' behind your thoughts (very similar claire weekes advise). The more you practice the more your mind quietens and even when the anxious thoughts do come up you see them for what they are and just let them be.

I really cannot recommend it enough

[mummy4]

anyone else :(

[mandie]

Hi Mummy4

I can relate to alot of wot u have said. im scared to go into supermarkets nearly all of the time. i force myself to go.

I hate waiting in the playground for my daughter.

i feel scared and anxious so much of the time.

My worse symptom that scares me the most is the dizzy and head rushes feeling, feeling not here that i get when im anxious. so nearly always!!

I have been on and off of meds for 5 years, i hate taking them. i have tried cbt last year and it was ok.

The problem is the anx and panic is still wiv me and i just dont no wot to do next

my dr is refering me for more cbt, im willing to give it a try again

I read claire weekes recommended by so many people, but it just did nothing for me

I wish i had an answer for u, but im in the same boat

:hugs: love mandie xx

[Dave777]

Hi Mummy4,

I have similar problems to you, I hate Supermarkets :lac:

It may help to know you are not alone.
We do the best we can.

Dave:flowers:

[mummy4]

mandie,

i feel for you as you sound similar to myself. i think its great you 'force' yourself to do everyday things as sometimes i really cant manage to do them things :( xx

dave, thanks and yes it means lots to know i am not alone xx

[mandie]

I think the reason i force myself is probably as a single parent, i dont have the partner to do the things for me.

Also i no you have to face your fears or it will gradually get worse.

I no its hard but i will do anything to try and get myself to how i used to be. Of course there are days when i dont want to do anything or just feel to anxious and panicky

love mandie x

[mummy4]

i feel for you mandie must be really hard being a single parent (((hugs))) xx

[Hayles p]

Hi i was just reading a post that you wrote and you said about thyroid problems and anxiety, just wondered what you meant by that.
I have an under active thyroid and suffer with anxiety, is it possible these 2 things are linked or am i way off.
thanks

[mummy4]

hi hayles,

i have a blood test on wed (dreading it) for a full blood count ..... including test for thyroid problems. the reason gp suggested this was because i struggle a lot with being able to lose weight and also i had a 2 week long period which made me see the gp in the first place.

x

[Bill]

A Normal human being!:hugs:

Ok, a few words to think about....

I am almost 'scared'
I avoid
I hate it
I do not
I don't
I hate
I am dreading

At present your anxiety and fear is ruling your life which is of course why you're sick of it. This shows in the words I've selected above. Every day is an effort because every morning you're "dreading" the thought of getting up. You "hate" each day because you know your fear will create symptoms that "scare" you so much that you "don't" want to experience them and so you want to "avoid" them.

These words will stop after you've dealt with the following...


When I am 'forced' (by myself)
I get a very scared and nervous feeling
frightens the hell out of me is dizziness
Really does scare me
I worry more.

The above words describe your daily cycle that drives your attitude towards each day hence the negative words I've copied first.

You force yourself to try and overcome your fear but each time you attempt to, you feel nervous which then creates dizziness which then frightens you which then makes you worry about getting up eaxh day.

Firstly, Don't "force" yourself. There are 2 different ways to approach fear.....

The first way is to force yourself into a situation that terrifies you but you're already terrified before you start hence "forcing" yourself into attempting something you're "dreading", "don't" want to do, "hate" and rather "avoid" because it "scares" you.

The second way is to force yourself into a situation that terrifies you without "thinking" about being afraid by learning how to keep relaxed by constantly reminding yourself you have nothing in reality to fear because the feelings won't harm you and with time and practise the words then become "enjoy", "do" want to, "love" and rather "face" because it "doesn't scare" you.

Once you learn how to do that you Will....live life as a 'normal' person...but whether or not you do overcome your fear, you'll Always "Really" be a Normal person who just suffers from anxiety.:hugs:

[magic girl]

when im normal i don't think twice about going to supermarkets,school run,family parties,holiday and on day trips i even volunteered to go swimming with my sons class at school which involved a bus journey but since my relapse at christmas i have struggled with all of the above.i will only go shopping with my mum or hubby,i can no longer go swimming with my sons class,holidays are a no go and my sons school have been very supportive by letting me pick my son up 15 minuets early from the school office but i still shake,feel dizzy and sick and have that horrible feeling of unreality when i try and do any of the above but i make myself as im not going to let it beat me.i find medication really helpful and since my meds where increased i have felt a lot better and i think when the weather improves and we head into spring and summer we will all feel a lot better as its been a long long winter this year so please dont give up hope its your life so don't let anxiety and panic rule your in charge not them.
i hope you start to feel better soon and when you do manage to do something difficult treat your self as a reward you will get through this and we are all here to help you:hugs::hugs:

[mummy4]

Bill thank you so so much for your post, you have really made sense, i always love reading your posts, you are an inspiration :)

magic girl, thank you so much too and its really good to know im not alone xx

[pjb]

hi mummy
I really really feel you. I'm a bit agoraphobic too and avoid social situations. I've been going through this for 4 years and realized by avoiding things, I have done nothing but escalade the attacks and anxiety.
I just read something a few days ago in a chakra book I've had forever but never read and I think this could really help you as you said you hate labels.
so,,, basically you need to stop giving labels to things. The more labels you give, the more unnecessary power you're giving to those things that don't even deserve it.
So if you're feeling any sensation, simply say "I am angry" and that's it.. not that you're angry because of this and this and that,,, but just that you're angry. end of story. with that, you can transmute that negative energy and push it towards something else, changing it into positive energy or taking that energy and running around the block or putting it towards something else. And of course, you can do the same with feeling anxious. "I feel anxious" and that's it. Take a deep breath, and let it all out. Don't give external things the power over you of feeling anxious.
It's really empowering and you should be feeling a detachment of that negative energy.
I hope that makes sense. Let me know how it goes. This worked for me the first time I tried it. and I feel like you can try it with any emotion or feeling.
I read it in a short article in the book for Chakra for Beginners by David Pond.

[munkeyinblack]

I dunno if this will help or not but i noticed when you postd you started by asking who you were, and then you listed al the bad things that were happening at the moment ?

Perhaps try another approach and look at the other side

Who are you ?
You are a wife
You are a mother
You are being so brave by posting on here and facing your fears, asking for help and looking for answers

I dont know you at all, yet there three huge positives ! Panic and anx do not define you but the fight they give you helps make you stronger and helps define you in a good way because you will be a stronger happier person when you beat this.

pm any time
Munkey
x