Feeling guilty

[stimpy]

[:I] I know this may sound a little odd - but lately I have been suffering an attack of concience, sometimes to the point where it has brought me to tears :(.
Brace yourselves I think this is going to be a long rant. - sorry. [:I]

I was cleaning out my pet rabbit and a random thought popped in to my head.
It occured to me that I've using washing powder, bath products, washing up liquid and taking medication that has (at sometime or another) been tested on animals.
Thousands of animals have suffered and still suffer, just so I can have pretty coloured hair, nails and lips, whiter whites and soft clothes, a clean floor and a nice smelling loo.

I felt so sad and guilty, I actually felt as if I had physically tortured the animals myself.
Now I'm not about to join the Animal Libration Front for 2 main reasons.
1 I don't think they allow agrophobic members and
2 I'm scared of blowing myself up with bombs while liberating mice.[:p]

I want to make a difference, but I know that the difference I make will be pointless.
I don't make the law, I can't change the law, and they wouldn't listen to me anyway!
I try when ever possible to buy things that aren't tested on animals (especially cosmetics, perfumes and shampoo etc.) But even so millions of people do buy things that are tested on animals.
So it is not like I am going to affect a companies profits - am I ?

Medical procedure and Medication, as long as the animals are well cared for, given medical attention and are not suffering to the extreme, well I can forgive that as it has saved millions of lives.
But the animals are not being cared for are they, they are beaten not given pain relief and are often just left to die.

Cosmetics, cleaning products and shampoo - well, I mean around 38,000 animals are used and killed in developing cosmetics every year.
Surely they must have tested billions of chemicals and products and if companies don't know what ingredients are safe, by now, then I guess they never will.
The only consolation is that many companies have stopped using animals for testing - Shame these haven't ...

Colgate Palmolive Limited, Crookes Healthcare Limited, Elida Fabergé Ltd, Jeyes Limited, Iams, Kimberly-Clark Ltd, Kodak Ltd, Proctor & Gamble Ltd, Sara Lee Household, Kleenex, S C Johnson Wax Ltd, Scholl Healthcare, Smithkline Beecham Ltd, Stafford-Miller UK Ltd, Sundrops Limited, Unilever, Universal Concepts Ltd and Warner Lambert (However these companies say they only test NEW products, and where health and safety law demands it.)

Sorry about that, it was a rant and a half wasn't it.
But you can see how these thoughts have infected my head.
I just feel so guilty, and sad about the whole thing.

I wonder if it's my inner need to prove that I am a good person?

Anyways thanks for listening, I'll give your head a rest.

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx

[:p] Panic Monster & Scatty Eccentric

[TheGodSplinter]

Hi...

Watch out for over-estimating this guilt!

When the exhaustion that anxiety causes begins to affect us in a way that we can notice, for ourselves, often...the first sign is that our conscience becomes an orphan that can suddenly find itself adopted by any good cause and the guilt that you are experiencing is a very early form of depression that *never* stays, but is still felt, resoundingly, in more than one area of your life. Some longer-term anxiety sufferers actually look upon this feeling as a great liberator and, in several senses, they're right about it.

This period of "guilt" is one which will pass and it may even alter your general trends of purchases and awarenesses, in respect of the very animals about which you now feel guilty.

In the meantime, in order to combat this feeling, in the event that it may get the better of you (it usually won't), there is only one cure, in the arena of general life...that is doing something good to compensate for what you think you did that was bad. This is a trick that works on the "self" even when we are fully aware that it is only a trick and is a very good weapon against this type of feeling ever reaching extremes. Some people have even built entire careers around the results of this feeling and they are tremendously successful at those careers.

I've been there, where you currently are...around 7 times, out of the last 22 years. The feeling can often get so intense that it is capable of reducing you to tears at the very sight/sound of the guilt subject. And, as I've said...I came out of it with a slightly altered way of life, such as becoming a vedgie...and that wasn't such a large change for me, really. In the end, it's a personal choice and it's one that most folks make the right one in, almost instinctively.

You can't change what happened to the animals in the past. You may wish to involve yourself in changing what is allowed to happen to those animals currently being experimented on. But, whatever you decide, your charity has to begin at home. Concentrate on getting well, for now, and compensating for humans' "inhumanity" to animals, a little later.

You may even have found quite a passion for your future years that will open up all kinds of therapeutic doors for you. If that turns out to be true, then I sincerely hope that you love the new facet of your personality that will emerge and that you are successful in whatever you decide to become a part of, later, as a result of this new feeling.

Take care.

Ian.

SOMETIMES, YOU MUST DO TO WANT-TO-DO!

[stimpy]

Thanks Ian

I understand myself a little bit more now.
I guess "you can't change the past" applies to this subject too.

Like you say, If I'm thinking about little animals instead of myself, it must mean I'm getting better.

I can't change the world, so I guess a small effort is better than nothing, for the time being - anyway.

Thanks for your great words of wisdom.


Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx

[:p] Panic Monster & Scatty Eccentric

[Lottie32]

Dear Liz

There is only so much any one person can do. Content yourself with ensuring that YOU lead as blame free life as you are able, and lead your friends by your example.

I can no longer watch the news or read anything distressing as I get upset at others cruelty, and frustrated that I can't do much about the injustices.

So I still eat meat, but try and eat free range, organic etc where ever possible, and buy as many things that haven't been tested on animals as possible.

The problem with animal testing is that it is everywhere. I don't mean to tip you over the edge here, but I work for a chemical company. We sell chemicals to the textile industry. We do not test on animals, as we only blend and supply, but the things we use HAVE been tested on animals. That means technically, wearing clothes also contributes to the animal testing problem. Conversely, animal testing ensure that we don't make ourselves ill by contaminating our bodies with "clothes that can kill" !!!!

If you want to do something useful, can I suggest that instead of the Animal Liberation Front, you join one of the organisations that campaigns for the ethical treatment of animals.

I went right off the ALF when I went to an agric show last year. There was bird man there, who flew birds of prey. He also had had a very successful breeding programme, raising rare and endangered birds, and releasing them into the wild. When we saw him he only had a few birds with him. This was because the ALF had released some mink from a mink farm into the wild. These mink had attacked and killed the majority of his birds (if he had kept them in cages, not large pens, this wouldn't have happened). They had also killed two very rare birds, that after 10 years of trying, he had just managed to successfully breed. The youngsters all died too. Needless to say, he was distraut, and terribly diheartened. He loved his birds, and was an avid believer in trying to reduce the number of endangered animals.

Whilst the ALF meant well, their action was badly thought out.

Campaigning for the ethical treatment of animals, in my opinion, is a better option. Whilst people want to buy soaps, detergents, make up, cleaning products etc. etc. there will always have to be testing. So why not make sure that the animals that are used have the best possible lives, and that needless tests are banned.

I hope I haven't depressed you even more Liz! These sort of issues really get to me too, and I'm afraid my way of coping with it at the moment is to act like an ostrich! Sometimes you have to make yourself top priority.

Charlie

[Meg]

Hi,

All through my working life as a nurse and also since working with anxiety striken people it is a fact that we take life and health - ours and our loved ones - almost, but not quite for granted.

It is only when faced with severe critical illness within the family or having your life transformed by anxiety that we change our entire perspective. I've seen paople from all walks of life and of every age be touched and change overnight from what they'd always portrayed and seemed to stand for.

We come face to face with our own mortality or sanity. Each of these we assumed would be with us forever and it is until the day it isn't.

We have very little time to come to terms with the sudden change but a lifetime to reflect on it.

It is this reason why so many people who subsequently have a change of lifestyle or career choose to move into something a little less selfish than what they did previously and move into something a bit more holistic and generous , be it just giving of your time more freely.

This translates into being much more aware and sensitive to the plight and sufferings of all around you especially when you've been so focussed on yourself recently - so I think you're being totally normal Liz and recovering well.

I don't think you should look at it in any way, other than another step forward in your self development so congratulations. Many more people than ourselves could do with it !

It is said that we're moving from time of the solar plexus (survival) chakra at present to the time of the heart chakra which is one of the many reasons that there is a huge increase of emotional related issues in the last decade or so.
Take that as you will !!

As regards the animal thing - I agree with Charlie. I worked for a pharma company and within the clinical trial department. I know what went on and the ALF regularly came in bus loads and really harrassed the staff, ruined peoples cars with pots of paint , took digi pics of us when leaving work under police escort , spat at us and worse and then stuck these pics up on the internet. Noone was spared but the poor people worst hit were contractors who didn't even get a choice of where they worked that day - they got sent wherever the contracts were so always had a terrible time. So an ethical treatment company seems far preferable to the bunch of louts that seem to be the ground force of ALF.

If you really want to avoid products which have ever been tested on animals and are totally free of any addidtives or carciogenics then do research Neways. I looked at loads of companys and settled for them . I use all their personal care products and a few other things but totally swear by their vit and mineral supplement 'Maximols' and their deodorant which doesn't have either antiperspirant or aluminum properties. If you want further information just let me know.

Meanwhile if you do your bit and we do our bit - it does make a difference and a big one at that.









Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...