Im sick of not having anyone there to understand

[Neverbeensoscared]

I have liturally got one person who generally and honestly gives a shit and cares about me at the moment. To be fair i feel like im living in anxiety and panic alone. No one to understand and okay people aint guna.. but at least care? Like my Mum, she got pissed off with me a second a go because i went in to get a fag from her packet. Fags at the moment i find help me, bad very bad i know but i feel although they're bad they really help. I do try and not use this often, but she just caught me taking them out the room. What really pisses me off is that she smokes, has done even when her own kids have not wanted her too, she's never tried giving up and won't try. She canno't even have a go. I find even though ive been close to her recently i am really closing off from her because of the way she is treating me. I never wake her when i am having a panic attack. I dont want too, in the end people just think your faking it and shes obviously going that way. Ugh what a shit life. I really feel as though i am not worth much anymore. I feel like i should not be here anymore.

[jude uk]

There is no doubt you are a very tough time at the moment but remember this is what this site is here for. Its for posting how you feel and knowing that people listen and that so many have felt and feel the way you do too.

[Neverbeensoscared]

yeah i know, its just really hard not having the people around you understand how you feel. my mum jst cant and i understand that she doesn't have them, but it would be nice if she tried too. My dads been trying and i dont really even get on with him that great at the best of times. Its hard. :/ but thankyou :) i really love this site its a great way to escape at lonely parts of the night to be honest. i appreciate it.