puting on the mask at work

[skyblue]

hi everyone

i wonder how many of us put on the mask before we leave the house,and keep it on all day and wonder why we feel so exhusted,.
i was wondering what you all may think on this, my employer knows to some degree that i suffer from anx/depression and we had a small chat about it,,

i dont like to go on about it but some days at work are a real struggle,especially is im having a bad day,and simple tasks are hard,,do you think we should say IM HAVING A CRAP DAY...just being here,or should we struggle on,not wanting to make a fuss,or draw attention to ourselves,or seen as the company moaner who is always in a low mood,,, the mask gets tighter and tighter, you have to force yourself to stop clock watching,that is going backwards,.

would be interested to know if im not alone....

love to all
skyxx:flowers:

[cherrychick]

I am doing that now...only good thing is that I'm the last person here..so I'm on my own and can actually accept and enjoy to some degree this foul mood that I'm in....

It is hard work putting on the mask...I like to call it putting up my walls - I pretend to be bubbly and happy but inside I'm dead...

[skylar]

I'm doing that now too. I work in a restaurant and I have to keep moving and smiling while inside these thoughts are rushing through my head, then it gets worse because what if I can't escape work if I need to? If it turns into a full blown panic attack and I can't get away and I pass out infront of everyone (which has never actually happened) It just adds to my anxiety and I am considering having to quit, is there hope for managing this day to day? I don't know how I got here

[cherrychick]

I had to take 6 weeks off work sick (and I'd only just started my job in November last year)

I have this contant fear of letting people down...probably because I have done so in the past...I really want to keep this job...it might be the only way I can beat my social anxiety...but it's really hard work...

Kate - I panic about panicing and worry about having a panic attack - especially when I am working alone...:scared15:

[cymraig_chris]

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[JT69]

Hi I hav done this on and off for the past 11 years of my life. I cannot stand the thought of those around me knowing how I am feeling?? I sometimes wonder how I manage it though, as inside you are really feeling it but from the outside you look normal. Unfortunately for me I have been out of work 4 months now and so in the end had to admit what I was suffering from but only to those I really wanted or had to. I just hope when I return I can go back to how I was and no one will think any different. Jo.

[smudger]

Jo, Ive thought about the impact of people knowing in a work situation. Sometimes I have regretted telling people because I don't want to be 'labelled' as weak! Now I am improving that feeling is subsiding. I had time off work with pneumonia a few years ago and there seems to less stigma in that than having depression. Daft isn't it? But you know what? What counts is how you are now and what you do now in terms of when you go back to work. If you start with a happy positive confident demeanor, thats how people will see you whether they know about your illness or not. If you accept that you have had an illness and now you are fixed just as if you broke a leg and needed to have that mended then things will fall into place and you can continue without shame, without guilt, without embarrassment from where you left off. Its such an education suffering any illness and coming out of it at the other end don't you think? We now have a wealth of knowledge about an illness which is more prevalent in society than the Government currently acknowledge. We now have power because we can recognize the signs and we know what needs to be done. We are empowered. Sorry, I'm rambling again!

[Caz 47]

yes i agree when you have depression or anxiety problems there is always a mask and i have worn mine for a very long time everyone imagines i am cheerful and bubbly because i dont share how i feel and sometimes if you do folks will avoid you im afraid people donot want to be around you when you are depressed unless you have a very very good friend who understands and over the years i have found they are very few and far between its like if you tell them you are depressed or have panic attacks they think they will catch it too ... this is only my opinion and what has happened to me you folks may have been lucky .. my husband is very good but bless him i find even his patience wears thin after a while of me getting uptight and panicky this i can understand as i feel folks think like breeds like and when you get depressed it brings the other person down ....im also of the opinion that most of us wear a mask whatever things we have to deal with it is a shame and i find this forum so good because you dont have to wear a mask because everyone understands in one way or another how you feel ....

Sorry for the long reply .... Carole ...