Should I Feel Lonely?

[SHYGIRLAJB]

Hello Everyone,

Sorry its me again.I live at home with my loving parents, and my man. Should I still feel lonely??? I just have a lot going on at the moment I feel so alone for some reason, yeah I suppose I don't have any realy friends, to talk to and things. I have lost one of my online friends, cos I opened my mouth like normal and said awful things I guess. Now they are not speaking to me whats so ever.

I just don't know really. I am so low and depressed at the moment its unreal.

http://talk-depression.org.uk.invisionzone.com/public/style_emoticons/default/sad.gif

[sb001f8994]

Hi,
Join the club! I know loneliness very well. Im agoraphobic and find it very difficult to make friends so the few I have I cherrish. My auntie once told me you can have all the friends and family in the world and still be the loneliest person and I guess thats true. You dont have to be alone to feel alone. Sometimes I think we issolate ourselves and put up invisable boundries and without realising it can actually cause our own loneliness. There's nothing I can suggest to beat this feeling except fill your time with your family, your man and be as happy as you can be with the people that mean most to you.
Take care,

[PoppyC]

Hi
I agree with what your auntie said to you, Carol. My mum used to say a similar thing - You can be in a room full of people and feel lonely.
I agree with Carol too, about filling your time, because that does help.
I have a lovely boyfriend and son, plus other people, and people at work, but I still feel alone and lonely sometimes amongst them - like something is missing. It doesn't now but it used to make me feel depressed or maybe being depressed made me feel that way - not sure.
Part of my anxiety/agoraphobia makes me want not to be social and want to be on my own, but there is another part of me that doesn't want that. I used to be so different.
I think maybe the reason why we withdraw when we have anxiety, depression, agoraphobia, social anxiety and all the rest, is that we need time out to recover, away from people, in a way. That is my thinking anyway.
At least we all have each other here on this site who we can relate to, and for that I am really greatful, because imagine years ago, before the internet, how people with what we all have, managed, especially agoraphobia, who did not have others to turn to, who understood. It must have been very lonely for them.:weep:

[SHYGIRLAJB]

Hi,

Thanks for your replies.

Hmmm not sure what to say. I am going to be away for at least a week, long story, well trying to look after my mans dad, who has terminal cancer, not good. he is very ill at the moment and we don't know if we are coming or going at the moment. With different, things saying he has this problem he has that problem.

It don't help with the problems im having either. Im just arghhhh.

I don't know. :(.

[PoppyC]

Hi again
It cannot be easy for you at all.
Sending you hugs of support. You will find a way to get through this. It just happens somehow without you realising. You will find you are a lot stronger than what you realise.
I am also so sorry for your partner and his father.That awful disease - I just wish there were a cure for it.
My thoughts are with you all at this difficult time.
:hugs:

[SHYGIRLAJB]

Hi, Everyone.

I know this is sort of a very old post. Well that person whom I said who wasn't friends anymore. I didn't ever know why he choose not to speak to me and that. About a couple of weeks ago, he sort of wanted to be friends on the social networking site. Foolish me, thought oh yeah just will add him. It just feels like the same old thing de ja vous and getting very very upset. I text this person they said who is this and I said who I was and asked them a question they didn't answer. Tried to chat to them on the chat on the social network site they choose to log off.

Why is he still doing it to me again. WHY!!!!! It feels like whatever happening all over again. :weep:

I thought its been about a year since we last chatted either via text or whatever. I thought why not just accept the add.

Anita.

[EmMaxwell]

Someone once said to me "depression is feeling homesick, even when you're at home" and I thought it hit the nail on the head - and this thread brought that thought back to me.

Don't beat yourself up for 'saying the wrong thing', though. One thing I've always believed is always telling someone the truth. If they can't handle that, it is THEIR fault. (Of course, sometimes a bit of tact is in order!)

Don't feel like being lonely isn't normal. We all feel it. All the lonely people are together. So, really, shouldn't feel lonely. If only it was that easy.

[cherry84]

this feels very familiar but still upsetting.
if this friend is upsetting you so much it may not be worth fighting for. I know lonliness is painful but its more painful trying to make a connection and it falling apart.
I'm not saying resign to lonliness but i'm sure we've all tried to hold onto people who aren't good for us for fear of being lonely but there are plenty of decent people out there who do and will care.

... i need to find these people too though
xxx

[SHYGIRLAJB]

Hi

Many thanks for your replies. Well this person has never told me why he didn't want to talk to me and ignored me. hmmm.

Perhaps I should just delete them off my friends list now, as its really upsetting. Well for starters why should I keep them on, a, try and send them a message to find out how they are and what they have been upto, etc. Doesn't answer even though they have been on the site. Tried to chat to them on the social networking site, they either log off or don't answer.

I suppose the only answer is to delete. but hmmm. Just feel so sad cos when they were down and things and had no one to talk to, I was sort of there. I listened to all of the things etc, but when this person seemed to make new friends out goes me, probably and don't want to know.

Oh I don't know im sorry just feel really upset about the whole thing. :weep:


Anita.

[PoppyC]

Hi
I wouldnt waste a moment of my time on someone who is making it perfectly obvious that they don't want to keep in contact with you. I can understand how hurt you must feel, and how you have been there for this other person in the past, but it really cannot be helping how you already feel. Try and put this ex friend in the past and start making new friends, even if online.
As for loneliness, I think a lot of people with anxiety and depression feel this a lot. A lot of people write about loneliness on this site, I have noticed.
I know I can feel lonely even when I am surrounded by people that I know. It is a feeling just deep inside me at times. I think it must be due to anxiety.

[SHYGIRLAJB]

Hi,

Well I couldn't really cope with it anymore so I just deleted them. They were just ignoring me. They could have been messing with my head on purpose or whatever. I no need to try and not think about it. I still wonder what I have done wrong though.

Oh well, need to try and make new friends. Easier said than done though. I don't think me and people quite gel together. I sort of joined an English class to try and make new friends, but don't think that is happening oh well.

Sorry.

Anita.