How do I get my boyfriend to understand?

[jenjen210]

Hey,

I'm currently in a relapse with panic attacks and it's really getting me down. I've tried telling my boyfriend but he just cant understand what it is. He says he does understand and he is trying but what he says really doesnt help, he always says things like "its fine", "youve did it before y cant u do it again", "uve never been like tht when ur with me"

Ive tried giving him booklets etc to help him understand but i know he is getting frustrated with me and its making me very upset. What will i do!?!?!

[fairyclairy]

Hey,
I know exactly how you're feeling!
I too am having a relapse with panic etc and gone really bad again.. i try telling my bf but he just doesnt get it.. he thinks that cos iv got over it once, its easy to get over it again and its easy to jus stop panicking! (if only it was that simple!)

Hang in there and keep being open with him and havin coversations about it.. he'l soon realise that u cud do with his help and he'l soon realise that u cant jus 'pull yourself together'

xx

[cymraig_chris]

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[cymraig_chris]

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[tasia]

After being married to my husband for nearly 18 years and suffering with, self harming, panic and anxiety attacks and depersonalisation.. he is still totally useless at understanding how im feeling, and never does anything to help me..so over the years ive got tough and go through the motions by myself...sometimes you just have to rely on helping yourself, my friends are more of a comfort to me at times. Hope maybe he will one day understand how awful panic attacks truly are...good luck.

[rhea]

its relly hard getting sum1 to understand who hasnt experianced panic attacks n anxiety, as they hav no idea wat its lyk, i had da same problem wi my fella as i suddenly got panic attacks n anxiety n i totally changed n it was hard for him to understand me which i cant blame him for but at da same tym was really frustrateing for me, i write down all my feelings literally everything about wa happend to me en i had a panic attak n da way i feel every day, also i got lots of stuff of the internet n i sat him down n showed it all to him n he did start to understand, but really i think if sum1 hasnt experianced it then they will never fukky truly understand xx

[jenjen210]

Hey,

Thanks for all of your comments. I agree with you all, I think if someone hasn't ever experienced a panic attack you will never know how terrifying it is. I think he's starting to understand how much it bothers me but not quite WHY and I just wish he would understand why this is happening.

I suppose some of it is possibly me too because I don't really like to speak about it. I try but I find it quite difficult and to be honest quite embarassing cos im scared he will think its stupid

[cat25]

Get him to take a look at this site-maybe he'll understand better when he realises its a real condition that thousands of people suffer from.

[cat25]

Take him to an oceanarium, ask the keepers to refrain from feeding the tiger-sharks for a few weeks, give him some swimming trunks made of raw meat and tell him to swim round the shark tank for as long as it takes for him pull himself together. Tell him he'll be fine and not to worry.:shades:

:roflmao:

[AthlonGod2k10]

Hi there,

well if it makes u feel any better my ex has just walked out on me because she cant handle me haveing this anxiety so count yourself lucky that i got a boyfriend but really if he dont wanna understand what anxiety is and what it does he really isit worth it :) x

[beskiboo]

I joined just to reply to this! I was recently diagnosed with a panic disorder, and it really came between me and my boyfriend. He was worried, but at the same time tried to rationalise it all, telling me there was nothing to be worried or axious about.

What really helped me was to sit down and explain exactly how all of the symptoms feel, like explaining how for me it's not related to anything, I'll just suddenly feel so afraid of nothing, and how it feels when I can't breathe. After putting it in a way he understood a bit better he was much more use haha, and doesn't tell me not to worry anymore!

[26 lee]

i truly believe after having panic attack for 10 years that unless you have them you cant understand how terrifying they are. and as much as they read about them talk about them they just don't get it. you have to try and get them to think of there biggest fear and get them to really concentrate on it and they still will be a million mills away from the way you feel..

[jenjen210]

Hey guys!

Sorry I totaly forgot about this post and just saw all the replies! My bad!

Beskiboo: How nice of u to join just to reply! Since posting this I have been more honest with him and open about it, something I have never been before, I used to keep it all inside because I thought it was embarassing and ppl would think Im crazy. anyway he is more understanding now, I think hes beginning to understand that Im having problems and it means I need to get better.

Athlongod: I'm so sorry about ur gf. She really wasnt worth it if she didnt understand and u are bound to find some1 better!

Thanks every1 for ur support :) I will keep u updated on the goings on! I'm feeling pretty low at the moment and I think thats what is affecting our relationship the most, I guess I need to pick myself up and try to be positive!

xx