Uncontrolable fears

[bensmummy]

HI all,

a few nights ago i experiance sleep panic where just as ur falling asleep u feel astho ur holding ur breah and gasp for air an i havnt slept properly since.
each time i close my eyes i have an anxiety attack and i now fear falling asleep,
i havnt been on medication for 2yrs and was doing really well at handling my anxiety myself but 3 days ago i cracked and reached for the magic pills that make it all go away and so now i feel defeated like my life will never change, this is the 3rd time in 6 years iv been on meds and they work great 4 me till i come off them so i would like to no has anybody been on meds more than once but eventually got there and never needed them again?
thanx 4 reading x

[guitarpants]

Classic all or nothing thinking. I suffer from this big-time. If you are on a diet, and you have a donut, it doesn't mean your diet has failed and you should the other 11 and give up (got that from a book).

Yes, medication is a crutch, and not a solution. You will improve, even if you had a setback. Just keep your eye on the prize. Sometimes you go up and down so much that you don't see that the entire time you are still climbing the mountain. Don't give up and don't lose hope, your mind and body want to heal, and they will if you let it.

If I ever feel panicky or anxious at night, I will still take a xanax before bed. They do help, and it's better than dealing with the feelings. Anything that gives your mind a rest is good. You'll keep improving, don't worry.

For a long time I would improve, and then I'd think "why am I not 100% better yet". And I'd stress, and get even worse than I was before. Now when I look back on the past few months I realize my improvement has been DRAMATIC although I not nowhere near out of the woods yet. But I realize that since I'm been making slow, steady improvement, that one day everything will be normal again.