monophobia and panic

[joanne1983]

I suffer from monophobia i think altho i never been to doctors over it as feel silly, its got to the stage where i panic and im nervous and aniexy all day if my partner goes out anywhere, he has even lost his job over it, im ok for short periods of time like when he goes to the shop or to walk the dog as i no he is only 5 mins away, this has gone on for over a year and every time we fall out and he goes to his mums i find myself ringing him after an hour or 2 for him to come back even tho i cant forgive him for whats hes done, its got to the stage now where he nows he can do asnything and i will always have him back because of the fear and terror and panic i feel alone and away from him, What can i do?? i dont want to be with him anymore but have to be with him i cant be without him mentally, PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!!

[lizzie29]

Hi

I have monophobia too, and my husband was always my "safe" person. I gradually put myself in situations where I was on my own, just for an hour at first, and then increased the time. I always made sure he had his phone and I kept busy to distract myself.
I was by no means sorted but was managing a bit better, but not overnight or anything without him. I then found out he'd done some terrible things (illegal things, he committed fraud) and I think he thought I'd always stick by him because of my fear (like you said about your partner). However, I found out that he'd told me loads of lies to me about himself over the years and he blamed me for what he'd done. He became really horrible and I knew there was no way to resolve it other than divorce. I always thought I could never cope without him, but I did, and I do. Yes, it wasn't easy, but with the support of friends and family it was a lot better than I expected. And to be honest, know that I'm the other side of it, I feel quite good that I achieved something I never thought possible (although I would obviously have rather not got divorced but anyway!)
You CAN do this, life is too short and you have to think about yourself. Your happiness is more important, and being with him could do your anxieties more harm than good in the long run.
Feel free to PM me and we can chat about this more if you wish. :) xxx

[mrdj]

i know exactly how you feel its got to be one of the worst feelings ever . its just the fear of been alone in the house that gets me if i know someone's in the house no matter where they are then im OK , but as soon as im alone that's when the fear kicks in , my daughter will be going away to start university on Saturday so that means a constant fear for me even though she spends most of her time studying in her bedroom at least i know im not alone but ive been dreading her leaving for university for months now the day is almost arrived my fear has got greater and im panicking like crazy DREADING IT

[suzy129]

i have agorophobia and monophobia and have to plan days in advance to make sure there is always someone at home i hate this feeling i feel like i am a child

[LauraJF]

I have monophobia too and I strongly dislike being alone for too many hours but I've found that the more I do it, the easier it gets. My parents used to go away a lot and my fiance is a golfer and he usually turns his phone off when he golfs. It was very difficult in the beginning. I would pace the house crying but after a while I started finding it easier to cope. He would call every few hours and I knew that at the end of the day he would be home and we could spend time together. It's a fear that is worth facing. The worst that will happen is you will feel panicky and exhausted and it is difficult but after a while it gets easier. If you want to we can email each other while you're on your own or you can always post in the forum. That can help you to feel less alone, you really won't be alone since there's so many people here. :hugs:


I suffer from monophobia i think altho i never been to doctors over it as feel silly, its got to the stage where i panic and im nervous and aniexy all day if my partner goes out anywhere, he has even lost his job over it, im ok for short periods of time like when he goes to the shop or to walk the dog as i no he is only 5 mins away, this has gone on for over a year and every time we fall out and he goes to his mums i find myself ringing him after an hour or 2 for him to come back even tho i cant forgive him for whats hes done, its got to the stage now where he nows he can do asnything and i will always have him back because of the fear and terror and panic i feel alone and away from him, What can i do?? i dont want to be with him anymore but have to be with him i cant be without him mentally, PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!!

[tracy7024]

I have monophobia really bad, I cant be on my own, I really feel for you, it is so horrible, the fear takes over :(