what if i don't want to get better?!

[joannap]

having a bit of a bad replapse at moment of anxiety - do not want to rush back to docs for more meds/swap meds (am down to 10mg citalopram) - having constant anxiety all day with bad panics too - trying to loose my fear of anxiety/panic but then thought what if i don't want to get better? is this just a scary thought? its almost as if i hate it but am so used to it being there now! has anyone else had the same?:ohmy:

[ElizabethJane]

Yes I think that is true sometimes. we get so comfortable with being ill that we do not have the confidence to take the next step in feeling better. Sometimes it is easier to take stock for a while until you feel able to go on. There is nothing wrong with that. It is better the devil you know...I am sure that you do want to be well but at the moment you do not see a way out of your prison.

[Antipodes]

Anxiety is soo awful and I am sorry you're experiencing this in such a distressful way.

I was wondering why your GP has prescribed an anti-depressant for your anxiety symptoms? Usually they prescribe an anti-anxiety med for relief of anxiety symptoms. Perhaps you are also suffering mood depression too? Perhaps you might see your GP and ask for a medication review so you are confident he is treating you holistically and not ad hoc.

I hope it all gets better soon.

[Gregor]

i think probably it is a scary thought that you might actually be getting better. I've been with anxiety for about 7 years now and, whilst i've been through various degrees of wellness in that time, never have i ever considered i could be back to 'normal' again. I think that's down to been scared of the unknown. I can't even remember what it's like to live a normal life. My wife has never even known the 'real' me (as we met during my anxiety period).

I don't think for one second that you don't want to get better - i know no-one would choose this way of life. However, getting better can be a frightening prospect. I really don't know what to suggest, sorry! but always do make sure you are receiving the correct treatment and not a standard governmental procedure!