View Full Version : HELP its all come back and it wont stop!
I suffered with a very severe anxiety over two years ago, it took me a long time to be okay again, i still had awful days but it was copable and i began to live my life again.
Then suddenly out of the blue, i had a panic attack in the middlle of the night, i tryed to dismiss this and carry on as normal. Then the next night i woke up having the worse panic attack ive ever had, it went on for 2hours until i finally feel asleep. The next day it was as though i had re-wound two years, terrible anxiety, crying, loads of pa's everything has come back and wont stop. Yesterday i stayed in bed, this didnt help, still had pa's even though i was trying to feel safe. Today i got up and tryed to get on with stuff, its sooooo hard though as im feeling so terrible and never seem to feel a break form the symptoms.
My partner is trying desperately hard to help me, and we've just had to tell our young children mummy isnt very well at the moment and it makes her cry as she hates feeling poorly.
Im still on the same 60mg meds i was prescribed 2 years ago, i havent changed anything. Nothing has happened to make this suddenly happen again.
Ive come back on here as i know people understand (was once a big contributor LOL). Has this ever happened to anyone else? If so, how did you get over it? What can i do? Anyone please help, any advice please?
Im so depressed and so frightened, i cant eat, i feel sick, im scared of sleeping as i can wake up panicing.
The thought of making people worry and making them sad again is killing me.
Please someone just help me climb out of this.:weep:
X
Hey Popsy,
Sorry to hear you are having a bad time of it again...what meds do you take hun??
Sometimes you can go through a spell of the anxiety/panic attacks again and there isn't anything that you have done differently to cause it.
I suffer from depression and anxiety and it is the same for me, I can go along for ages absolutley fine and then I just wake up and the whole thing starts over again and sometimes I can think what may of triggered it but other times I just haven't done anything differently and it just happens.
I can so totally relate to everything you are saying...especially when you mention about not wanting people to worry etc as I am like that, I hate putting others through it when I become ill.
I think it is good that you got up today and tried to carry on normally as this often distracts the anxiety I know that works for me usually. You might find that it is just a little spell you are going through and that it will pass in a day or so...hopefully this is the case for you. Have you any diazepam to take along with your meds until you settle again? I find that is what I have to do sometimes.
Hope it passes for you hun.
Take care
Jo.xx
It is strange how it just comes back for no apparent reason...almost like the body has too much adrenaline or something.
I think it would be great if you had a few diazepam in the house. If you had one right away, it would stop the cycle kicking off. 2mg twice or 3 times a day for 3 days would probably do it.
OMG i have just cryed with the relief of receiving replies, thank you so much xxxxx
I have a few spare diazepam from 2 years ago, i have been taking about once a day, as i wasnt sure what else to do. They are 2mg ones, i will take your advise and start taking them regularly until i start to improve. I dont think i have enough for more than a couple of days, but will do what i can and see if i can get anymore from GP tomorrow.
Thank you, thank you again, you dont know what it means to hear that people have had the same thing happen to them especially after so long of doing okay.
I also have been drinking rather alot of alcohol in the evenings to relax me (before this relapse happened) and now ive stopped completely so im also wondering if im getting a bit of withdrawal - im ashamed to even type this. No more alcohol for me, if i can get through this im promising myself i need to take far more care of myself and this condition.
Thank you again xxxxxxxxxxxx
Hey Popsy ! Don't worry, you got over it before and you will get over it again. You are only caught in a cycle of fear at the moment, and as soon as you stop being afraid of the panic attacks they will lessen and become less intense. I know that those words 'accept them' come easy, but I think the sooner that you do the sooner the fear of them will melt. I have a very bad anxiety period over a decade ago, and have recently had a 'blip' for a few weeks, where panic attacks returned with avengence. I swear I was having them most of the night and day in waves for about 3 days. To be honest my main fear was that I was going to end up 'being like I was before', but that hasn't happened as I clearly learnt something from last time.
(There have been some new symptoms this time, but the kind people on this forum have helped alleviate fear over those.)
The panic attacks didn't kill you two years ago, and they won't this time. It'll take a while to use up all that adrenaline in your system so try and be physically active when panicking, however hard that feels.
Take care
OMG i have just cryed with the relief of receiving replies, thank you so much xxxxx
I have a few spare diazepam from 2 years ago, i have been taking about once a day, as i wasnt sure what else to do. They are 2mg ones, i will take your advise and start taking them regularly until i start to improve. I dont think i have enough for more than a couple of days, but will do what i can and see if i can get anymore from GP tomorrow.
Thank you, thank you again, you dont know what it means to hear that people have had the same thing happen to them especially after so long of doing okay.
I also have been drinking rather alot of alcohol in the evenings to relax me (before this relapse happened) and now ive stopped completely so im also wondering if im getting a bit of withdrawal - im ashamed to even type this. No more alcohol for me, if i can get through this im promising myself i need to take far more care of myself and this condition.
Thank you again xxxxxxxxxxxx
Hey Popsy,
Dont be ashamed of printing anything...you have nothing to be ashamed of. Glad you have some diazepam....they will help you and you will get over this...it is just a blip, you have got over it before so will do so again!!!
Take care hun
Jo.xx
hi popsy
sorry to hear you are feeling bad right now but it won't last forever. it sounds very much as though you have been on the meds but not perhaps found ways of relaxing and addressing lifestyle factors that contribute to stress/anxiety levels in general - hence using the alcohol to unwind - hence the panic when you have stopped. i know it feels as though life is ending but all you are suffering from is an overflow of adrenalin - i am just starting to come out of a setback - exactly how you describe and it can be done naturally - i have not upped my meds (am down to 10mg ssri) or taken anything else apart from the odd beta blocker - just accepted the fear/panic - tried to carry on - i've cried/ranted etc but i've realised that for my body/mind to calm down i need to just let it be there and not do anything to add to it - you think there will never be a minutes peace from the symptoms but if you can truly accept - after a few days you will start to see tiny improvements that you can then build on.
i have realised that this happens to me every 2-3 years and if i am honest it is because every time it does happen - i go on a new ssri and start to feel great and think - i can do anything i like because i am on meds - forgetting we all need down time/we all need to find ways to address every day worries etc instead of letting them all build up. this time i really am facing the fear and going down the natural route - tackling my fear of fear at its source and working out how i can keep my stress levels down day to day. you WILL be fine - just give yourself time and patience - the hardest thing for me was that i wanted it to be over with IMMEDIATELY - i spent a lot of days wondering whether i should rush back to the doctors etc until i truly started to accept it and work through it and now i am starting to see chinks of light of what i thought was a very dark tunnel - you will do soon too xx
ps - not there is anything wrong with taking meds but wanted to post to reassure you and others that the cure mainly lies within yourself - it really is the fear of fear we need to overcome xx
hello popsy, i have got no advise for you, only to say i have just read your post and thought it may have been something i wrote, i am going through exactly the same thing at the mo, really fuzzy head with mine at the mo, constant panic throughout the day, and been doing really well lately so so unhappy that its alll happening again, not that i was anywhere near completly better i was coping, now i just feel like i did 2 and a half years ago, phoned gp and asked for more counciling/cbt which he has arranged, but i dont feel like i have enough fight left in me to do it again!
:hugs:hears a hug just to let you know your not alone.
pm me anytime
xx
hi tinkerbel - don't fight it - float through - i used to think that if i gave in - the worst would happen although i wasn't sure what the worst was lol! you will not crack up/loose the will to live by giving up - exactly the opposite because you will stop adding adrenalin to adrenalin x
Popsy, hope you feel better today
Joannap what great advise. So, you have achieved the floating through technique.
With the hart palps, I achieve this only sometimes, depending how scary they are. I always think if I don't fight it, I'll die. I am working on this still.
Dont I know this! Had my first panic/anxiety attack about 8 years ago and had two in between then, drink stops my negative feelings and can pull my out of it. I went to the the doctor and he said a glass of wine is ok if thats all it is. I dont take any meds as it doesn't happen that often but I had one on my honey moon a week ago and it put out the first 3 days. Imagine how I felt with my wife next to me practically not being able to breathe or go out or look at our wedding cards etc, I never had it worse. I drank 2 glasses of wine and it ebbed away to a point I could breathe and talk and then although we packed up to come home we went onto a new place and gambled it would help, it did and I managed to put on a front so she had some kind of honeymoon I have had a really hard time the last week (my honeymoon) and the disappointment hurts.
hi typer
something i have to practice on a daily basis at the moment. this time last week i was ringing my mum in tears because panic was so bad - a week later - i can feel it there but in the background - no panic/no tears - just goes to show how you can heal naturally. i am sure i have a few months of this to go yet before i start to feel tons better but when i have taken anti depressants in the past it has taken many months to feel really well too. i am just so sick of going through this every few years and changing meds etc that i am determined to get well this time. i am only on 10mg ssri and plan to come off that too. i have also resolved to think more positively and live my life in a way where i limit my own stress (i tend to be perfectionist and poor time keeper - so thats 2 areas i can work on already!). i am thoroughly convinced by all that i have read re anxiety that it can be overcome without medication. yes - i am probably going to be someone who always has this tendancy but that;s fine if i know how to deal with it.
if gp's thoroughly explained what has happening to us - i am sure most of us would not have to go down the meds route at all - its just that most gp's/counsellors have never been through it themselves and only have limited knowledge of anxiety conditions. it is quite liberating understanding that even though i still feel bad - my recovery can be own my hands and that i am starting to make progress - hope this inspires others x
Sam, so sorry...you put on a brave front for the person you love, you did your best and your best is good enough. Hugs to you
Joannap
It is inspiring. I do agree, if only people/doctors took the time to explain what is happening. Better still, if only people/doctors would not treat people with anxiety as though they should be ashamed of it. (not all docs)
jothenurse
06-04-10, 15:45
What med are you on that you are taking 60 mgs of?
Freeasabird
09-04-10, 12:00
Hi popsy i am too just going through the same . I had post natal depression five years ago two babies only months apart and teenagers led me to become very ill. Agra phobia panic the whole thing. Thought i was going mad somehow i kept the babies safe and came through. Then this year progressive apathy and depression. I can just about get out me house walk to shops and back. I have no family it is so lonely and i am stuck out in the countryside. Lately i been feeling different maybe i am gettin bit better i just do not know. The dear of being unsafe is all consuming i know. But its true to say when you talk about your fears it helps. I only got internet on my phone so its my way of gettin help. You made it through last time you will again. I recovered to be a community worker and cycled miles. If we can just talk ourselves through we will be better improved versions od ourselves cause we will know more about ourselves. Try find the positive. Mine at the moment is i am losin weight. All the panic means less desire to snack i guess. X
Am in the same situation as you are right now. Telling the kids mummy is feeling unwell so we can't go out kills me. I'm just trying not to rush it at the moment an going easy on myself. The pressure of having to be normal just all gets to much for me sometimes and at the moment I just can't do it. Have no idea how to stop it all I just want some peace, if only for a moment.
shorty1969
24-04-10, 17:50
Think we all have wee relapses from time to time , just when we think we are doing great it rears its ugly head again :mad:... during the past nine years of this ive had it come back realy bad about three or four times ,and is still as frightening as the first time it happened , as it happens ive bein having a tough time with past couple of weeks , running to the doctor begging for help again , tired all the time , feel that i have no fight in me to beat it again (but i will )... I understand where every one is coming from not wanting to worry our family that we are struggling , i didnt tell mine i was having a hard time of it again up until a few days ago , Im kinda glad i did ! Think we worry to much !! lol,, worrying about people worrying about us..
Give it time poppsy , youl be fine :)
your not alone pal ....x
Sorry to hear you are suffering. I took paxil for 2 years but now I use natural means to control my anxiety and panic attacks.
I would recommend taking Valerian Root tea at night, and take some capsules during the day. Get a B-12 supplement and extra magnesium, these will help keep you calm.
Do try to get off of man made drugs if you can ! Good luck and you are not alone !
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.