i knew was too good to be true

[pink17]

Hiya,i have been on 8 dates with a guy,and really liked him,was starting to feel alot happier after starting with depression in nov,but i kept thinking this happiness wasnt going to last long because something always goes wrong,its like im not meant to be happy!Well its always me lately that seems to be texting him,i decided not to now and its up to him to text me,but he hasnt!So i knew the happiness wouldnt last long!I just wish i could be happy!Does anyone else feel like they are not meant to be ever happy?

[LucyR]

Hi, How did it go when you were with him, did he give any indications of just playing it along, and how was he after you left and went back to your place, how did he appear on the phone after your meetings?

[pink17]

Things seemed really good,we get on really well,and i thought after 8 dates he liked me!i just feel like everything has to go wrong!

[LucyR]

Hi, Perhaps he is ill? involved in an accident or has not been able to get in touch with you due to other reasons, how long is it since you have heard from him?

[LucyR]

If he is ok, perhaps he was not serious about a long term relationship if that is what you wanted? He may be scared of commitment or maybe he is the sort that likes to just play the field. I would see if he comes back to you and not contact him if he is ignoring you. If you never hear from him again, just put it down to experience and consider yourself better off for not getting further involved, and don't think immediately that you have found the one, I know it is very easy to do that but sometimes we just have to be patient.

[pink17]

it has only been since mon that we were last in contact lol!but i feel it was me makingmore of the effort to be in touch,im just going to wait for him to b in touch with me now,thank u for the advice x

[LucyR]

Hi, Ok if its just been since Monday then he may well be in touch again soon, like this weekend? Did he used to phone you every night?

[natalier]

No, if you think everything will go wrong it does. You will notice things that others might not have and only notice the negative. you went on a date, lots of people would see that as very positive!!! i also think im the one texting and got annoyed when I did not text and then he did nto either. he says he does not know what to say and likes it when i text. i been with him 2 years!!! So it does not mean they they dont like you. I trained him now to text more buit its still mostly me. dont worry, just text and if its nice it does not matter or there are plenty of fish in the sea x x x

[pink17]

Thanks guys!!i will try and be more positive!i think i have just got it into my head that something will go wrong and the happiness wont last,because i have had a bad time of it last couple of years so not had much happiness lately xx

[LucyR]

Hi, The person for you will most likely come when you least expect it and won't be the obvious, thats what I have found!!

[natalier]

same. My previous and only other relationshipfor horrible. he treated me so bad i thought girls were just toys. i finally got out, and didn;t exspect anything and then found the perfect guy so yeah it does happen x

[alias_kev]

Hiya. I remember your thread from early in this relationship a few weeks ago.

You've done really well I think ignoring your negative thoughts (until now) and having a good time on your dates (I hope). If the guy doesn't get in touch then I hope you can remember the good times you've had. And it won't have ended badly or in any kind of unkindness or anything. Compared to how you felt before and what you expected I think that's pretty good. You've also had some practice at getting out and so on.

If the guy does stay in touch then things are even better!

As someone else commented, some guys are very slow/shy in writing or even text and if he'd got used to you always making the first text in a conversation then he might be a bit stuck. Or he might think you've gone off of him. So I'd suggest waiting a few more days. If he'd not been in touch then send one message saying that you enjoyed your dates and would like to see him again but you are waiting to hear from him. Or something like that. That gives him a nudge without seeming too needy or stalkerish! If you know his address you could even send a letter rather than a text!?!?

Hope that male perspective helps.
Kevin.

[pink17]

Hi Guys,thanks for the advice,well the guy im dating texted me lastnight and we went out,so all that worrying for nothing!

[LucyR]

Hi, Thats good to hear, see they aint all bad!:yahoo:

[Anxious_gal]

Judge him by his actions not his words.
also do let a few days go by without testing him and don't always text him straight back.
You need to busy with your own life.
seriously sometimes a little no contact works wonders :-)

[alias_kev]

Hah! Well that's good news. :yesyes:

It shows how much our anxieties can easily interfere with the natural course of events.
Have fun.