Embarrassed when listing symptoms to doctor

[Onwards & Upwards]

Do you get embarrassed when listing your symptoms to the doctor?

I kinda feel that mentioning 3 symptoms is my limit. I worry that the doc might think I'm making stuff up and I just hear my self talking and see the doctor listening and it makes me feel uncomfortable, like I'm going on too long about things.

Anybody else feel this?

[wotcanisay]

yep witch often makes me worry more lol

[margaret jones]

Yes the same thing happened to me yesterday i had written down what i needed to ask for re tabs and was told by GP to get to the main thing in rather a abrupt manner , I asked for some blood tests CHOLES HEAMOGLOBIN LIVER ETC and wss told we dont do them as a general check up even though i have not had bloods taken for 18 mnths Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr we should not be made to feel like this i will not go to her again in poss but my GP on hol x try a different Gp maybe Take Care Maggie

[MightyPC]

The Drs do not like you going and telling them what you are worried about and what tests you want. I was told last week; I studied 8 years to get behind this desk and you look on the internet. If it was that easy you would be on this side of the desk.
When I mentioned my symptons he laughed and said they change everytime I see you. Next you will say that you are having a heart attack when you get a pain in your arm. I mentioned that In the last 6 years I had been to the dr 4 times, though since Jan I have probably been 40. Reason? because I still feel ill. He just looked at me and prescribed citalopram. I am lucky to have private medical with work and have boycotted my drs and gone straight through to specialists.

Whats the difference between god & a dr. God dosent think he is a dr.

[NeverRelaxed]

^ he really spoke to you like that?

disgusting.

[Onwards & Upwards]

The Drs do not like you going and telling them what you are worried about and what tests you want. I was told last week; I studied 8 years to get behind this desk and you look on the internet. If it was that easy you would be on this side of the desk.
When I mentioned my symptons he laughed and said they change everytime I see you. Next you will say that you are having a heart attack when you get a pain in your arm. I mentioned that In the last 6 years I had been to the dr 4 times, though since Jan I have probably been 40. Reason? because I still feel ill. He just looked at me and prescribed citalopram. I am lucky to have private medical with work and have boycotted my drs and gone straight through to specialists.

Whats the difference between god & a dr. God dosent think he is a dr.

He sounds like a knob!

[margaret jones]

Maybe he will suffer from anxiety sometime and need a sympathetic DR i hope he doesnt get one the rotter

[cattia]

I sometimes get too embarassed to tell the doctor everything as I feel like such a nutter, then when I leave I just worry about the thing I didn't mention and in the end I have to make another appointment. My doctor is quite good as I have explained my HA to him so he knows that I worry a lot about symptoms that he may think are nothing.

[lise864]

Yes, I get embarrassed too. I feel like an idiot so I don't mention everything I'm worried about, especially if they sound silly. For example at the moment I'm concerned that my stomach looks wonky (the right side sticks out more than the left), but I'm sure they'd just laugh if I told them that!

[marley]

This is a general rant and is as much directed at myself as any other person. I think I need to get it out, though...


The best way to avoid this embarrassment is to avoid Google. It must get tough for doctors when they know a patient has been checking the internet - how on earth can they separate the symptoms the patient is feeling, to the symptoms the patient is merely anxious about?

A scenario: A person has a swollen lymph node and Googles it. Finds out about lymphoma. Other symptoms of lymphoma can include itching and night sweats. Person remembers feeling itchy a few months ago. Has felt a bit hot at night (it's coming into summer, but person doesn't recall it getting too hot yet.)

Person freaks out at adding all these perceived symptoms together. Instead of going to the doctor to ask about the lymph node (the original reason for their Google 'research'), they go to the doctor with a bucket list of 'symptoms'. This is not good for the patient, and it has given them an extreme level of anxiety, and now the doctor has to wade through the information and diagnose. The doctor feels the lymph node and examines the patient and tells the patient that they have a flu. The patient feels momentarily reassured.

A couple of days pass and the patient feels an itch. Oh God, they think. My lymphoma! It's spreading. So they get on the internet again. This time they find a support group for people with lymphoma. It talks about their process of diagnosis, and about how the doctor almost missed it (almost - the doctor didn't miss it... the patient doesn't see this). The patient flips out. I KNEW IT. I KNEW THE DOCTOR WAS WRONG. I'm going to another doctor.

Do you see where this story is going? (I can - it was my actual story...)

Put yourself in the position of the doctor. How arrogant are we, going into their office, telling them how to do their job after 'researching' from the internet (Google)?

If someone took the same approach with your chosen profession, and told you how to do your job after searching on the internet, you would probably not react as kindly as most doctors.

Imagine a system where the we can just walk into a doctor's office and ask for any tests we desire. It would be needless and chaotic. A doctor not only understands why a certain test is relevant, they understand the risks in subjecting a patient to the test.

It is not about a doctor being God, or playing God or thinking that they are God. That is our perception. The reality of medicine, is that if a doctor screws up or misses something, they will potentially be sued. Where is there any room for ego in that? We need to stop equating medicine to alchemy. A doctor is fallible - they are scientists; taking a hypothesis and using tests to prove or disprove it. This is how all science works, and medical science is no different.

Lastly, and for my own curiosity, why are you going to a doctor and demanding such specific blood tests? Did your normal doctor refer you for those blood tests, or suggest they may be necessary?

[anxious]

I have to say i totally agree with Marleys post. I actually find it more reassuring when a doctor seems 'uninterested' in my symptoms. They cant afford to do that unless they really think you are ok (other than the anxiety).

[Onwards & Upwards]

I don't actually go to the docs that often, I think my feelings of awkwardness are more to do with being self-effacing and I've never been one to moan when I feel poorly, so I kinda feel awkward talking about myself and my problems so I come out of the doctor's feeling that I haven't told him/her just how crap I'm feeling.

[MightyPC]

I can see where you are coming from Marley and speaking to friends in Australia they claim your health service is far better than our cash strapped NHS. There are stories daily in our media abouth drs being inexperienced and misdiagnosing and various issues with hospitals. I think this can sometimes add to a patients anxiety, especially when the dr can barely speak english.

My experience with my local GP and alot of others, not all of them, is they seem to be too busy are arrogant and are penny pinching working to budgets. If I were a dr and had a patient like myself turn up, noting that the person had only attended the pratice a handful of times in so many years then I would take the patient seriously. If all was clear, I would take the time and reassure them. I will not go into my problem as I do not want to bore people, though after having many tests which I deemed pointless, though I am not medical trained so I maybe being unfair, I was told that I would have to have a test to rule out cancer. I know with this country that we tend to eliminate and leave the big nasty tests until last, when often it tends to be too late. I do realise that these tests can be invasive and are not warranted for alot, probably, the majority of cases, however asking for a test which was ignored then carried out 3 months later, you can imagine how I felt. To my fortune, I was wrong and they were right, though I personally know of 3 cases that ended so tragically due to the patient not being taken seriously. My mrs swears by the NHS and thinks it`s a great service, unfortuantely my view is some what different. This was reiterated to me by a medical proffessor this week. An ex of mine was a nurse and some of the stories I heard made me shudder. However, on a positive I have just returned from seeing my nurse who I think is fantastic and takes time to listen and talk ( a bit of contradiction I know). She said to me " when I was training I asked how can you tell if a patient is really ill or faining" the reply she received was real illness does not hide itself.

So I think we all have to take something from that.

[blondie47]

Awesome Marley. I'm keeping your wise words in my head and my heart today as I go for a long awaited but dreaded CT scan.

I had a nurse in the hospital tell me once that Google was the bane of her existance. Since nurses are always the first line of communication, its their job to discern what to tell the doctor and what to throw away. They have to play detective as it is, then you add on the patient doing their own "research", and it becomes a very tough job to discern what symptoms the patient has as opposed to what they perceive they have.

[charsey]

I never tell the doctor everything i worry about. I too feel that 3's generally my limit. But then i figure the ones i don't say obviously aren't that pressing and generally by my next visit i've completely forgotton about them. For example i had a tiny new mole appear on my foot when i was pregnant (this was two years ago) and not once in any of the visits have i mentioned this to anyone of the doctors i'v seen because in the back of my mind i know it's more than likely nothing. Although writing this i now feel like i'm tempting fate and will probably have to go get it checked out!!!

[mentaljail]

yep witch often makes me worry more lol

Believe or not this topic is kind of humorous. I can't remember the last time I saw a doctor. I should probably see a head shrink soon though. But as I read the post and like 2 replies, I started to play this out in my head and it made me kind of giggle. It mostly made me giggle cuz I just imagined being that person and getting annoyed at the long list of symptoms. It's not you doctor, it's me. Why do I have all these freaking symptoms!! Why can't I have a 3 symptom limit?!! I'm sick of talking!! NO MORE SYMPTOMS!! :)

I get annoyed with my own voice, especially when I'm having small talk with people I dont know. Sometimes when I try to tell a funny story I kill the story cuz half way through it I'm done telling it. lol.

[mojopin]

when i came back from living abroad ( 5 years) i didnt have depression or anxiety but have done in the past...and when after 1 year things started to go downhill again...i went to see a doctor i remember as a child..he put me on beta blockers and they made me worse and i was a wreck when i went back and he said " whats wrong with you - dont waste your money on councilling its a complete waste of time and money and only goes over past things that you think were important" after i left that day i felt like doing myself in...

[mojopin]

i totally understand though about feeling embarrassed about talking about symptoms doctors have to handle people with anxiety etc very carefully because it sets off all sorts of worries and fears and you think you have everything...infact i thought i had dvt last week i dont....ive just finished wearing a holter monitor for a week because i thought there was something wrong with my heart ( waking up with tachycardias) ARGH some doctors suck balls bigtime and should not even be working with people with mental illness /conditions because of their lack of empathy and patience.

[deb141]

At my GP practice you are only allowed to discuss two things maximum, there is a poster on the wall in reception reminding you. I made the mistake of asking about a 3rd problem in my appointment (which by the way had not even lasted 5 mins) when i was told to hurry up and explain or make another appointment !. I wont see that doctor any more, i also feel like a naughty child whenever i visit the gp (i am 35), in my experience there has only been a few doctors that have a good bedside manner.

[blondie47]

At my GP practice you are only allowed to discuss two things maximum, there is a poster on the wall in reception reminding you. I made the mistake of asking about a 3rd problem in my appointment (which by the way had not even lasted 5 mins) when i was told to hurry up and explain or make another appointment !. I wont see that doctor any more, i also feel like a naughty child whenever i visit the gp (i am 35), in my experience there has only been a few doctors that have a good bedside manner.

What the heck? I'd be finding a new doctor. I know NHS exists in the UK, do you just have to go to whatever doctor they send you to?

I guess I should count my blessings, we still do not have NHS in the US. If I don't like a doctor, I just find a new one. Its truthfully taken me years to find doctors who are compassionate and understand my anxiety. One of them, my gynocologist is a good 10/15 years older than me and I just know the day is going to come soon where he tells me he is retiring I dread that day!

[Onwards & Upwards]

Believe or not this topic is kind of humorous. I can't remember the last time I saw a doctor. I should probably see a head shrink soon though. But as I read the post and like 2 replies, I started to play this out in my head and it made me kind of giggle. It mostly made me giggle cuz I just imagined being that person and getting annoyed at the long list of symptoms. It's not you doctor, it's me. Why do I have all these freaking symptoms!! Why can't I have a 3 symptom limit?!! I'm sick of talking!! NO MORE SYMPTOMS!! :)

I get annoyed with my own voice, especially when I'm having small talk with people I dont know. Sometimes when I try to tell a funny story I kill the story cuz half way through it I'm done telling it. lol.

Ha ha! That's made me giggle! :D

[mentaljail]

:)