Update and a little bit of Anx

[mentaljail]

Just to update on all my previous post, I have talked to my mom and I am feeling a lot better and not so ignored, however, it was almost a week ago that I talked to her and this is the problem with people like us; I have to fight off the feeling that they're ignoring me again, but I am doing doing it cuz I now the only reason I care so much is cuz I have no support system in place, ie., friends. So all is well with my Mom.

Today I had to leave my house to pay some bills and the idea of having to leave gave me anxiety, but not nearly as bad as it use to be. Before my mom and brother came down to Phoenix, Az, U.S.A., I could not function outside of my dads house, that was a year ago. I couldnt go to stores, convient stores, malls, or out front. When my mom and bro got down here I gathered up the strength to go into places like stores cuz I didn't want my brother to see me as weak and after a year of doing that, I can now go to the store or a public place and only get a little anx. There are places I still have problems with namely bars. Before my mom left I did go into a bar with her, but she had to do all the ordering and I didn't sit at the bar and someone tried to talk to me and I was irritated cuz I wasn't hearing anything he was saying. I just wanted him to stop talking, lol. But yea, thanks to mainly my moms company in the past year, I have a lot less anx in stores; I guess that's why I got so emo when they, they were kind of my world.

Now I'm looking forward to making a good life for myself and finding a good group of friends, this is my goal. Cheers :)

[Veronica H]

:bighug1:more power to you anxiety buddy. I am finding great comfort from 'Happiness' (A guide to developing life's most important skill) by Matthieu Ricard. Published by Atlantic Books ISBN 978-1-84354-558-3. He is a Buddhist monk, was a scientist in cellular genetics and is also a philosopher, photographer, translator and works on humanitarian projects in Tibet. He is a magical human being. Here is a link to one of his talks.

http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/matthieu_ricard_on_the_habits_of_happiness.html

I am glad that you are moving forward and you have your buddies here who really get this illness. You are not alone.

Veronicax

[RosieXXX]

Hello Chris,

Your post does sound more positive; it is great to hear you have managed to get out to the store etc. It must be hard now you are on your own, but it does seem like you are beginning to gain in confidence, and I am certain you will be able to build on it. It is also good to hear all is well with your Mum, so at least you are not left worrying, and I am sure you will be speaking with her again soon. It is difficult to switch off when you suffer with anxiety, and the same old thoughts have a habit of reappearing, but I am sure if you can occupy youself as much as possible, and focus on the the goals you want to achieve, this will become less of a problem.

It is wonderful you have found this site, because you will be able to gather a lot of strength and support and also help others with your own experiences.:hugs: