impetuoso
24-04-10, 17:51
Hello All,
I've done this the wrong way around because when I was searching for info about long-term use of Escitalopram, I stumbled across one of the posts and felt compelled to reply.
I was diagnosed with clinical depression in my late 20's and have been on and off medication since then, but I believe I have suffered unknowingly from depression since I was around 7 years old, just after the break up of my parents. I have so many issues that many other members have, but I have always found it difficult to talk. I have visited psychiatrists and psychologists and, possibly due to personality issues, have found some of them irritating and shallow. I know all the terminology and have read many self help books but have found that at the end of the day, there's just me.
People see me as kind, caring, funny and empathetic, and I have too often - at the cost of my own well-being, spent too much time worrying about others. I am currently off work due to a particularly bad spell over the past 2 weeks but just know that I will have to get myself together.
I have suffered abuse of various kinds, from peers and older people and I was relentlessly bullied at high school because I was "different". I left before taking exams because of this (If only the head knew when he told me that running away from exams won't get me anywhere - he had no idea - half of his staff were bullies!). I was always one of those who were the last to be picked when the PE Teacher allowed the "Cocks" to pick their sides for footie. I was never taught to play football because my dad had left, I had no role model, and there was an assumption that all boys should know the rules - well I didn't.
I have gone through periods really low self esteem, self loathing, loneliness and misery. Strangely for me, writing this is calming me down a little - maybe because I know that I am only doing it through a "hole" in my protective "wall"
Anyhow, I truly wish the best for all of you, because I know what a nightmare the mind can be - thanks for listening.:unsure:
I've done this the wrong way around because when I was searching for info about long-term use of Escitalopram, I stumbled across one of the posts and felt compelled to reply.
I was diagnosed with clinical depression in my late 20's and have been on and off medication since then, but I believe I have suffered unknowingly from depression since I was around 7 years old, just after the break up of my parents. I have so many issues that many other members have, but I have always found it difficult to talk. I have visited psychiatrists and psychologists and, possibly due to personality issues, have found some of them irritating and shallow. I know all the terminology and have read many self help books but have found that at the end of the day, there's just me.
People see me as kind, caring, funny and empathetic, and I have too often - at the cost of my own well-being, spent too much time worrying about others. I am currently off work due to a particularly bad spell over the past 2 weeks but just know that I will have to get myself together.
I have suffered abuse of various kinds, from peers and older people and I was relentlessly bullied at high school because I was "different". I left before taking exams because of this (If only the head knew when he told me that running away from exams won't get me anywhere - he had no idea - half of his staff were bullies!). I was always one of those who were the last to be picked when the PE Teacher allowed the "Cocks" to pick their sides for footie. I was never taught to play football because my dad had left, I had no role model, and there was an assumption that all boys should know the rules - well I didn't.
I have gone through periods really low self esteem, self loathing, loneliness and misery. Strangely for me, writing this is calming me down a little - maybe because I know that I am only doing it through a "hole" in my protective "wall"
Anyhow, I truly wish the best for all of you, because I know what a nightmare the mind can be - thanks for listening.:unsure: