I got into uni today

[lior]

I got into Goldsmiths today. I'm transferring into the second year from another course.

It was a tough interview. But I still succeeded. Why do I still feel dissatisfied? I'm not used to being so challenged. I crave it because I don't have it often. And here, I had a challenge, but I didn't enjoy it, and I haven't got any pleasure from 'winning' either.

Am I going to be eternally dissatisfied? Maybe it's the anti depressants making me numb. What do you think?

[hallam11]

Hello Lior!

Firstly well done! That was a big step and you got through it so well done!

Secondly I really know how you are feeling, I went out on Monday and Tuesday and kind of faced the world, went for an interview and felt like yourself afterward. I felt weak and dissatisfied! I too like yourself am wondering whether it is my meds making me numb because usually in a situation I would be used to feeling a certain way and it just doesn't effect me! I feel like a zombie alot of the time, sorry I don't know your background so i don't know whether you have depression but I do and I feel it is probably to do with that. I feel it may be my way of protecting myself from something that would effect me. Maybe its that, maybe it is the meds that effect a part of the brain that controls our reactions/feelings I dunno but perhaps.

xxxx

[lior]

Yes, I'm depressed, I'm on citalopram. But I like to think I'm recovering.

I don't feel happy but I'm not crying - it's just numbed sadness. I feel down and I'm not being as productive today as I want to be. I just have to remind myself that it's a blip, and I'll be fine in a few days.

Too bad my therapy appointment is a whole week away.

I think you might be right, the drugs probably numb the part of the brain that deals with reactions to big things. Or big reactions. So I've had a non-reaction and it's confused me.

Anyway. Did you get the job? xx

[gypsywomen]

well done :D

[hallam11]

Ah I see, yes I can have days where I will not be able to stop crying and other days where I just don't feel anything at all!!!

Haha like yourself my therapy appointment is also over a week away! But it does seem very possible that some times we will over react, and some times we wont react at all!

Hmm it was for a crummmy job at a call centre which only have 20 hours going, it would take one bus and two trains to get there so I told them to hold on to my name until they have full time positions. I really dont want the job though, I have a job interview on May 18th for an events graduate program which I REALLY want! So we'll see?!!!
xxxx