Saw Myself In Friends Photos Today :-(

[looking4answers]

Sorry ,if im in the wrong forum .Im so depressed..We just moved..Some of you may have been following my pre move..I was so happy to be home ,I have a lot more energy. The surroundings are my home. A general feeling of well being and happiness swept over me for about two weeks..

Recently I have been working real hard to get things in order. We have been eating out before the move and during the move and now after the move since we are having the kitchen re done in the new house. Its weird..It seems like at times i can breathe better and im more relaxed but the last few days I have been getting little anxiety attacks and have just been generally feeling ill and breathless.

I thought under the circumstances coming down over a mile and one half above sea level for five years I did well.We have been eating a lot and eating out but I knew we had been very busy and burning a lot of calories.

A friend came over and made photos when we first got here. I really didn't think much about it.. I knew I had gained some weight but my face I thought seemed to be ok.. I thought. I have also been worried about a mole that is the same shape is was over 10 years ago but has grown three times its original size but still the same shape and a little puffy.. But it has the characteristics of a mole and nothing more but I still worry.

My depression. My friend brought over his camera so that I could see if I would like to buy the same type. He had the photos he took of us over three weeks ago and I looked at myself and wanted to die..There was an old ugly weathered round faced old man..I could not believe my eyes.. How terrible I looked..I thought I looked like I did years ago ..I lied to myself until i saw the photos of me ..I feel so depressed, I am sick to my stomach and feel like im going to throw up.I am so ashamed. My skin looks really bad, I have a triple chin and I have lost a lot of my hair. The bad thing was i was going around seeing people thinking I looked the same ,Now I just want to hide in a hole.

Im so depressed and don't know if losing weight will make me look better as last time I lost a lot of weight the flesh was just hanging off of me.. and I looked like walking death but now I can't even describe myself as I just look in shame and can't believe my friend took these photos of me.I should not have let him ,but he likes to make me look bad I think because he is a little jealous of me..I can't understand why but he is.. Im sick with depression and sadness that my body has aged so badly and don't know what to do about it.Im feeling really low right now and I have stopped worrying about the mole i was worried about because frankly I feel ,maybe its time to leave this world as bad as I look.. Im not suicidal because im too chicken but now I have lost the desire to care.. And I just wanted to be home and have fun and see old friends and family and now I don't want to see anyone not even strangers.

Im sorry about rambling im just so depressed and discussed ..Michael

[KK77]

Michael, you haven't been around for so long and I'm sorry you've come back feeling like this.

I've been going through a blip that seems to be lasting forever more. Some days I think my humour and resolve are the only things that get me through. But there are things that you can do to help yourself here and I think that exercise is one of them. You can tone yourself up by doing simple weights, swimming or even walking an hour each day. Pilates and yoga are excellent too. Look into it.

I hope you feel better soon. Don't give up. Just because you don't like the way you are now doesn't mean you can't improve and get better. Furthermore, I'm sure people won't think any less of you for being the way you are anyway... But do it for YOU.

[looking4answers]

Hi,Wish exercise was the answer..I have been so busy and been so active that i wasn't sure I would make it..I did.. and now im depressed about getting older and found new worries that make me ill. I have exercised more than you could ever know to no avail and although it helped while exercising ,It hasn't helped my looks or my worries.Now that im home I have to wonder if I came back here for a reason.Maybe I knew it was time to pass on. I wa so happy to be home and then I saw the photos and then I began really worrying about a mole.Im really scared it might be cancer and afraid to go to the doctor so im basically back to square one..

[Typer]

I can relate. Its strange how we just feel the same, then see a picture and think oh no, look at me. This happened to me at Christmas. I'll be 60 next month. I have always looked a lot younger and I guess, still dont look 60. But the heart palps and the worry and anx, fear and depression that has followed has taken its toll.

I stopped going out..so put on weight, I look drawn and worried.

This did happen to a friend when she got depressed. She now looks a million dollars. She started tai chi, did meditation, changed her diet, drank plenty of water 1.5 to 2lites a day (good for the skin and can make anyone look 10 years younger) and started long walks...she lost weight and said she feels good. She does look good.

Although you are happy to have moved, it does score as one of the highest stress factors in life. Could it be that you are adjusting but also, stuff is still going on and things have not settled yet?

[looking4answers]

Hi All,

Well lol I still don't look better but I have lost 8lbs .I have accepted that im older and sometimes you just can't fight mother nature.I suppose if I loose some weight my face will look a little better and at the very least it will be better for my health.The mole I was worried about turned out to be seborrheic kerratosis.Its not the only one I have but never have noticed the others on my scalp before I got this one.These are non cancerous skin growths. They really don't know what causes them other than being out in the sun etc.. but not cancerous.

On the up side I haven't heard my heart in my ears like I used to in about 5 months since we have been here. I guess it was something to do with the altitude .OOps I meant I haven't heard it most of the time but occasionally for a moment or two if my ears are stopped up. So far so good.I guess you just have to accept life as it comes at you and make the best of everything. Thanks for your comments and just wanted to say im somewhat feeling better now and thanks for caring.

[Nigel]

Hi Michael,

Try not to let a few little photos spoil what sounds like a happy move for you. It’s funny how we never seem to feel any different ourselves while our bodies...
Hmm... mature... :winks:

I still think of myself the same as when I was around 20, and it is a bit of a shock looking back at old photos. But the same goes for everyone. Ever noticed it with a friend you haven’t seen in years, or even seeing somebody famous on TV who hasn’t been on for ages?

And photos don’t always do a person justice, especially if taken by an amateur. Different angles, different lighting – it all makes a big difference. I recently went on holiday with Sister and her kids and they kept taking photos :angry:
Some of them I thought I looked horrible in!

The important thing is how you feel inside.

Good news about the mole :yesyes:

Take care,
Nigel

[looking4answers]

Thanks Nigel,Well you are absolutely correct. Lately the friends I thought about putting off because of the way I looked have in fact pushed.. well asked to come by and visit. I told them ok..what the heck .. as it turns out. WOW I was surprised at too how much
they aged too even though they are slimmer than I am .. wow again.Sometimes slim is worse than a little extra weight as far as wrinkles go .

Also Funny thing you mentioned famous people .In the last few weeks I have been doing a little more television watching with newer movies.. you know 2008,2009, and some 2010 and you are absolutely correct.I was more than a little shocked at some
actors and actresses that are my age and their looks well to put it nicely ,the years
have not been kind lol.. I know im bad.. but at least it makes me not feel like the only
one...And well as for the photos .. lol I look back at photos taken a few years ago that I thought were horrible and think..Hmm not bad lol.. Isn't aging fun??????? Thanks again for your kind words.. It is much more important about the way you feel
about yourself inside.Thanks again Nigel

[hoppipolla]

Hehe yeah man I know what you mean about aging - I am not "old" yet (only mid 20s) but I'm still worried about it lol

Also, I am getting a few health issues that it feels like I wouldn't get while younger, and having some hair issues (I am now VERY knowledgeable about guys hair loss, to the point that I think I understand mine in a good amount of detail and know several ways to probably quite successfully treat it! :) ).

Hm.. as for health.. this is a pot shot but as I understand, weight gaining and things as men get older is proooobably caused by 2 things, which are hormonal shifts and lowering metabolism. You may find that combining something like Ashwagandha or Ginseng (or anything that is good for "sexual" health - increases testosterone, etc) with pomegranate juice daily (lowers bad estrogen, probably increases SHBG, lowers insulin resistance, inhibits aromatase) coupled with a diet focused on veggies and basic foods (reduced grains and dairy) and exercise, may help to kick the bodies balance back into line :)

You can also even get supplements that increase mitochondrial energy and stuff, which may help to speed up metabolism. Iodine and selenium may possibly help too by enhancing the thyroid.

As a footnote, this forum rules IMO, but then I am an unusual case! ^^ - http://www.imminst.org/forum/

I am also on another forum to do with hair and health for guys, called Immortal Hair :)

ok erm.. *will shut up now* lol ^^

[Nigel]

Hi Michael,

“Funny thing you mentioned famous people .In the last few weeks I have been doing a little more television watching with newer movies.. you know 2008,2009, and some 2010 and you are absolutely correct. I was more than a little shocked at some actors and actresses that are my age and their looks well to put it nicely, the years have not been kind lol.”

I know. There have been several documentaries on TV over here recently about Jimi Hendrix as it’s the 40th anniversary. Not surprisingly, he looked the same as ever – probably much the same as how you and I like to think of ourselves. But some of the other rock legends interviewed look really old now. Certainly a case of ‘growing old disgracefully’ :winks:

Take care,
Nigel